dazed&confused Posted January 23, 2003 Share Posted January 23, 2003 I have been friends with for quite a while. We met in school, I have since graduated and moved to another state, he will graduate this year and plans to move to the state I now live in. While at school, we hung out on a daily basis with a group of friends. During vacation breaks, we get together and attend sporting events, movies, or go to dinner. We have gone on vacation together several times. He has introduced me to family and friends - all of whom told me that he speaks of me often. His friends now invite me to do things with them, even when he is away at school. After we had known each other about a year, he started acting different. Our relationship became quite flirtatious, and often our coversations get very dirty. He has tried several times to make a move, but never follows through. He'll cuddle, hug, pull me down to sit in his lap, and hold hands. After we had kissed for the first time, he told me that he thought it was a "bad idea." Later we had "the talk" - and he thought it would be better to keep things the way they were, and remain friends. Our friendship became very strained, going weeks without talking to each other. We both got involved with other people. Those relationships have ended for both of us, and our friendship seems to be on the mend. We have had two more discussions regarding our relationship, both of which he initiated. The first time he told me that it's too hard to initiate a romantic relationship with a girl he's known for so long out of fear of rejection - even when he knows the girl has feelings for him. The second time he apologized repeatedly for the problems in our friendship and said that he never wants to do anything that would hurt me. Both of these conversations took place after he had once again tried to make a move, and pulled himself back. I would appreciate any advice on this situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 23, 2003 Share Posted January 23, 2003 Sounds to me like he values his friendship with you and doesn't want to screw it up. What he doesn't understand is that if he doesn't upgrade the friendship and have a romance with you, the friendship will eventually end anyway because you will one day marry a man, have a family and won't have time for his butt. So tell him if he's interested in a lifelong friendship with you, let him make his move now....or the clock on the friendship will be ticking down. Link to post Share on other sites
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