Nikko Posted January 24, 2003 Share Posted January 24, 2003 My husband and I have been married for 6 years. We have a 5 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. My husband is a Taurus and he is stubborn as a bull. He is very tight with money and has played semi-professional ball for over 4 years before the trade was made that ended his career. Since then, my husband has been jumping from jobs and angry because he cannot make the kind of money he is used to making. To make a long story short, this past July he got fired from a pretty decent job making salary pay. Since then he has not worked, has not tried to look for a job, and is comfortable receiving $120 unemployment income. since then we moved in with my mother to save money and I have been carrying the load of paying bills etc... the whole time. I've told him many times how I should not be expected to carry the load and for him to stop being so lazy and get a job. I don't believe it is getting through to him. How can I get him to be more responsible without causing hard feeling between the two of us? That is the only problem so far in our marriage. He is a good person, but he is frustratingly trifling? Any suggestions welcomed. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 24, 2003 Share Posted January 24, 2003 Your husband is immobilized by severe depression from the rejection and failures he has experienced. Get him help with this condition in the form of counselling and/or medication. That should get him motivated to move on. I don't sense that he is being lazy...a series of life-altering events can be very painful and even debilitating. Men often define themselves by what they do and the amount of money they make. A man's self image can go right down the tubes when events unfold as they have in your husband's life. Don't leave him quite yet. I know you've been understanding but now is a time when he needs help. Don't nag him quite so much...partner with him to get him back on his feet. Help get him over this paralyzing depression and crippling low esteem and to find new work that will be exciting and profitable for him. If he won't get help, then by all means you have to look out for yourself and your children. Link to post Share on other sites
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