Just Dont Know...

[MELLOW808]

I'm 26. I live in Las Vegas. It's a pretty fun town. Its kind of hard to find real people out here. I have a lot of family that live here. That always helps. I guess I'm writing here today to talk about true friends. I have a group of friends that I like to hang out with. I met them all at my old job. Probably the best people I've met while I have lived in Las Vegas. I didn't really make close friends while going to college. Anyways, my recent situation with an ex-girlfriend has me asking who my true friends are...

 

My ex-girlfriend used to work at the same place as I did. She started hanging out with my group of friends through me. We broke up, I took it really hard. We were broken up eight months, and she decided to hook up with a guy I used to work with. Anyways, my friends all went out one night. I was invited and my ex-girlfriend and her new boyfriend was there too. I made it awkward. I shook the guys hand aggressively. My ex-girlfriend tried to hug me and I just shook her hand. I talked with a friend outside. She was encouraging me. Saying, "You're too good for her"...."You're a great guy". I was really depressed. I feel better talking about it with everyone I know. I mean everyone I know. Now, I'm questioning if these friends of mine are really my friends.

 

I have always had that insecurity about myself. I need acceptance. I need to feel loved and liked. I don't know if my friends are really my friends. I feel like my ex-girlfriend and her boyfriend replaced me in my circle of friends. Or, that the situation I am in affects me hanging out with my friends. Are these my friends? I know I have true friends from back home. I guess my depression has a lot to do with it. I am just babbling aimlessly. I guess I long for good friendship.

[beautifulearth83]

I hear you mellow. I could see that being hard in vegas. Everything is blinky and moving, when you just wanna stand in a moment and have a good conversation. But I do believe it's true what has been said that it's not always where you are and who you're around that matters. It sounds like you're an optimistic guy and that you'll learn to make the best of it.

 

It's possible that a lot of what you're questioning with these friends is preconceived because you feel you've been betrayed a bit by the girl etc. I wouldn't spend too much time trying to get everybody to take your side and feel bad for you. Approach it all as that mellow guy you know you are and that the friends that fell in love with you know you are. Show that you can learn to accept how you and your ex-girl's hearts have wandered to different directions and see them as equals, as fellow people. Your friends will see you as an even more stand-up guy and understanding person...the kind of friends that people want. But don't get walked on either. Also, it's quite possible she's a dumb whore that is complicating things lol. But you see what I mean. It's never as bad as it seems. But my friendships and future friendships are something that i'm heavily working on too. So you're not alone. I hope that we all connect better.

 

Good luck