Be honest.

[bish]

Depending on the relationship, depending on how good that other person is looking, depending on so many things- EVERYONE has the capacity to cheat.

 

Anyone who denies that is simply fooling themselves.

 

Wrong. Speak for yourself if you are that weak.

 

I have never cheated, never will. On business I had the opportunity in the bar at a hotel. Was having a good conversation with a woman who sat next to me while I was watching the elections on the tube.

 

She was very attractive and asked me if I wanted to go to her room for a nightcap. Its like she didn't care I had a wedding ring on, and I figured she saw it, but I flashed it to her anyway and said, sorry.

[Flyin in Clouds]

I've never cheated on my girlfriends or wife. I have had girlfirends cheat on me.

[BlueEyedGirl]

Wrong. Speak for yourself if you are that weak.

 

I have never cheated, never will. On business I had the opportunity in the bar at a hotel. Was having a good conversation with a woman who sat next to me while I was watching the elections on the tube.

 

There is no such thing as never. So you had a chance with some random woman and didn't take it. It doesn't mean that if the right person and the right moment came along you would say no.

 

I beleive that humans are very suspectable to cheating. Men are definetly more likely to cheat than women (say what you like but it's the truth). There are exceptions of course, but men tend to be more blinded by their sexual instincts than women. Simple biology. You could all talk about morals and strength of character, but the reality is, given the right moment moment and the right person everyone has a capability to cheat.

 

Women need few problems in their primary relationship but men don't even need that. If you can't accept that, then it's better to stay away from relationships all together.

[bish]

I dont feel good that I have cheated and will not cheat ever agian. I have found the balls to be honest about my needs and to cut a bad relationship. I also noticed that I have only cheated in unhealthy relationships.

 

Ya....its always some excuse isn't it?

[bish]

There is no such thing as never. So you had a chance with some random woman and didn't take it. It doesn't mean that if the right person and the right moment came along you would say no.

 

I beleive that humans are very suspectable to cheating. .

 

Only the sub-humans.

[jj2007]

There is no such thing as never.

 

I have NEVER cheated and NEVER will.It's called self control and repect for the person you are in a relationship with. When I was in bad relationships in the past I got out. There are NEVER ANY EXCUSES for cheating either.

[Trialbyfire]

Each person is wired differently. Some cheat, some don't.

 

Personally, I believe cheating has nothing to do with sex and everything to do with self-esteem or the need to have your ego-stroked. Justify cheating any way you want but really, it's about the need for external validation of desireability.

 

As expressed earlier, I have never and will never cheat.

[Sal Paradise]

I have NEVER cheated and NEVER will.It's called self control and repect for the person you are in a relationship with. When I was in bad relationships in the past I got out. There are NEVER ANY EXCUSES for cheating either.

 

Don't you love how some of those without self control can't seem to grasp the concept that not everyone suffers from their short coming? They like to paint themselves as victims of circumstance and that it could happen to anyone.

 

If you offered equally depressed individuals illegal drugs some would take them and others would turn them down. Those who turned them down have self control and realize the damage that drugs could wreck on their lives and those around them. Those who gave in to temptation were looking for a quick fix to numb the pain. No one would ever tell those who turned the drugs down "in the right circumstances you would of taken those drugs". They would just accept that they have self control that the users lacked.

[BlueEyedGirl]

Don't you love how some of those without self control can't seem to grasp the concept that not everyone suffers from their short coming? They like to paint themselves as victims of circumstance and that it could happen to anyone.

 

If you offered equally depressed individuals illegal drugs some would take them and others would turn them down. Those who turned them down have self control and realize the damage that drugs could wreck on their lives and those around them. Those who gave in to temptation were looking for a quick fix to numb the pain. No one would ever tell those who turned the drugs down "in the right circumstances you would of taken those drugs". They would just accept that they have self control that the users lacked.

 

Ah but it's not that simple. You can not say that people with self control don't cheat and those without it do. A person can have an incredible amount of self control, say losing 100lbs and keeping them off and still cheat. Personally I think it's a lot harder to lose 100lbs than to say no to the cute person that wants you. When I have cheated in the past, it was never due to lack of self control. I was always fully aware of everything, all the consequnces and decided to go for it, even though I could have easily said no have I wanted to.

 

To me, strongly desiring another person when you are in a long term commited relationship is already cheating. You can fool yourself that you have self control not to go through with it, but you have already cheated. Repressing ones desires is neither healthy nor will lead to you being a happy balanced person.

 

As for two depressed people given illicit drugs and one saying no and another saying yes: think about this for a second. Lets say I said yes to taking the drugs and you said no. You have self control not to take them because: "drugs are bad, drugs wreck lives" and similar. I on the other hand know myself well enough to say: this the darkest place I have ever been in and I need help, ANY help. I'm depsarate at this stage to just get through the day. I take the drugs and temporalily feel better. You on the other hand are still incredibly depressed unable to go on and commit suicide. Few weeks later I'm still taking drugs and feeling happy and decide that darkest days are behind me and I now have the strength to deal with the drug issue. I get myself off drugs (you actually don't develop long term depandance by using something for few weeks). I'm now doing ok, neither overly happy or depressed and you are six feet under.

 

Bottom line is, drugs are bad and affairs are bad is a load of BS. They both have their benefits when used correctly and far outweigh always doing "the right thing" by the stupid rules society imposes on us.

[Sal Paradise]

Bottom line is, drugs are bad and affairs are bad is a load of BS. They both have their benefits when used correctly and far outweigh always doing "the right thing" by the stupid rules society imposes on us.

 

There is no correct way to break someone's heart or destroy their life.

 

Society isn't preventing you from having sex with whomever you want. If thats what you want stay single or find someone willing to be in an open relationship. Don't blame it on society, most people don't want their SO screwing other someone outside the marriage (or relationship). Nor is it the persons fault for expecting that.

 

The blame and responsibility falls on the individual who decides to cheat. They have the choice of staying single, not getting involved with people who feel differently or they could try staying faithful. And if they can't do any of that they could get a divorce or they could break up with the person before they destroy them. Its that simple really.

 

Cheating is never justified.

[SueBee3490]

I have never cheated in any relationship/marriage I've been in and never will. I can say that with certainty. I've also had opportunities in the past as quite a few other posters on here. I never acted on them.

 

In fact, when I was going through the worst hell in my first marriage, my ex was gambling away his paychecks, we had 3 small kids to support. We had our phone shut off, our electricity shut off, the landlord was threatening to evict us for not paying rent, and all the while he's coming home drunk and telling me I'm not desirable, blah blah blah. I was just trying to work to feed my kids and keep a somewhat "roof" over their heads. I always kept my kids and myself clean and I was good looking - not drop dead gorgeous but I've been complimented on my looks. I could have went looking for a man to validate that I am still desirable but that was the FURTHEST thing from my mind. I didn't even think about getting involved with any other men, my main thought was getting my 3 kids out of the hell we all were living in!

 

So i don't agree with anyone who says we all would cheat if given the opportunity. I wouldn't because not only would I realize I'm living in a mess of a relationship or marriage that I'm willing to cheat, but I sure wouldn't drag some other poor soul into the mess too.