maoz Posted June 7, 2007 Share Posted June 7, 2007 Hello, Well - lets face it : the lust mechanism only works as long as one does'nt know the object of lust all that well. The young guy at work - what do I really know about him and his problems? I'm sure that if I got to know him better I'de see things I Link to post Share on other sites
Author maoz Posted June 7, 2007 Author Share Posted June 7, 2007 The message was posted before I finished the sentence, for some reason. Anyway - that's how it works, its all about us and what goes on in our minds and soal, and what we project onto the other person from within ourselves. The hormones and chemical argument is true too, to some extent. I think that approaching my co-worker was a mature thing to do. The heat was in the air, I am a highly sensitive person so I had to get it out of my system otherwise I would go nuts. I think women are somehow judged more severely for having lustful urges than men. When you think about it - what really happened? there was attraction and flirting, I told him I am attracted to him, he told me he is flattered but that's as far as it goes, he still works here, I still work here, I'm married, maybe he will marry too one day and I'II come to his wedding ! Link to post Share on other sites
JackJack Posted June 7, 2007 Share Posted June 7, 2007 There is nothing really wrong with being attracted to someone or seeing other things in other people we like, or even flirting a little. The problem is, or can be, for SOME people if there someone who is not all that happy in their current situation, then they are probably more vulnerable, for something to possibly really happen, than say, someone who is happy in the situation they are in. Now, I'm not excusing anyone from being free, of something happening like an affair etc, but when you have someone who is not happy really, vulnerable because they are not getting what they want, then flirting, attraction, etc, makes the temptation a little harder to resist. Therefore it makes all those things easily turn into a reality. The best thing to probably do, is no longer worry about this co worker and focus more on getting your marriage back on track. Its good if you feel what you said to him finally got your feelins out in the open, so now you are able to move on from all of that. Link to post Share on other sites
Aloros Posted June 8, 2007 Share Posted June 8, 2007 I would disagree. Sometimes it does work this way, that finding out more about a person kills the lust. Sometimes you find out something completely unattractive. But what if, the more you find out about a person, the more you find you have in common with them? I feel, in this case, the lust only increases. It's such a gamble to take. What if things had gone the other way? Who knows, though...maybe for you it was more the fantasy of things that was running your lust, and you knew you had to eliminate that element in order to subdue your lust for him. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoebe Posted June 9, 2007 Share Posted June 9, 2007 But what if, the more you find out about a person, the more you find you have in common with them? I feel, in this case, the lust only increases. Or the lust turns into love? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts