TurtlePower Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 For those unaware of my situation please reference this: This problem involves a lot of people, so bear with me if it gets a little confusing. It involves myself (20 something yr old male), my best friend (Lets call her Chrissy), her fiance and my friend (Lets call him Larry), and a mutual friend for all us, (Lets call her, you guessed it, Janet). Ok, about three years ago, Chrissy and Larry had a friends with benefits thing going on, they werent officially dating, just you know....Ultimately Larry wanted to break this off and he did, much to the chagrin of Chrissy. She wanted more than friends with benefits and she was heartbroken. She cried on my shoulder and really became dependent on me for the next few months or so. I actually thought she was falling for me too, but i decided not to pursue this as she was just like I mentioned dependent on me. Larry preceded to get with Janet and dated for about a month. Once again, Larry decides to end this, and vows to close friends that he is not interested in either Chrissy or Janet. However, fast forward a month or two later.... Chrissy gets PREGNANT!! With you guessed it, Larry. Damage control is under way. Conspiracy theorists mentioned that Chrissy trapped Larry into the relationship by getting pregnant. I defend her as she is my best friend and i dont like seeing her name dragged through the mud. Janet is surprised obviously. Larry and Chrissy proceed to tell everyone that they are very much in love. The rolling of the eyes follows by everyone and anyone. Ok so far? Lets fast forward to recent times... Larry and Chrissy now engaged, their kid is about 18 mos old, they have arguments on a monthly basis on how he feels that Chrissy and I are going behind his back and having an affair. He is super insecure and flips at the littlest things such as lunch being made for me by her, or assumes shes dolling herself up for my benefit. Not true. He goes as so much to accuse me and her of having an affair ALOT. Now, Chrissy and I dont get much time together anymore, mostly due to her not wanting to anger Larry. Lame excuses that she never used before are a constant now. One of her reasonings is this, "Larry is an old fashioned kind of guy, he feels that if you are with someone, you shouldnt hang around with other girls, if you are with a girl, that is the one girl you should be around. No one else." She is saying this because indeed I do have a girlfriend, but I still try to make time with my friends, obviously she didnt get that memo. But I digress... Yesterday, Janet comes up to me saying that she needs to talk right away about something. We finally get a chance to talk and she mentions, "Larry has been sending me texts left and right, constantly calling me, he wants to have sex with me." I didnt really believe it until she showed me her phone with all the recent calls and txt messages he had sent. The question I am facing, you, the jury is this: Is it my or Janet's place to tell Chrissy all of this? She most likely wont believe us anyway and if we do tell her, how should I or we go about it? Lately, my life has been a constant soap opera and I needed to vent, thus me using a Queen song has my title. I just feel Larry has some nerve to do this, especially after he's accused me of the very same thing he is doing now. Even though the closest Chrissy and I have ever gotten was her resting her head on my shoulder, the occasional hug here or there, and as I mentioned the utter dependence on me a few years ago. Any help is much appreciated. Ok, an update for everyone. A few weeks ago, Chrissy and Larry had another HUGE argument, ultimately resulting in them breaking up........................................................................................................ for five hours. During the interim, I of course console her as she was in hysterics. "He never loved me." "I don't need to be treated this way." "I don't know where to go or do." "I just don't care anymore." Are a few of things she said to me that day. But now, they are back together and I am beginning to think its battered wife syndrome, but thats a whole nother story for another time. My main beef is now, both Larry and Chrissy are ganging up on Janet. They despise her. Well, i should rephrase, Larry has a problem with Janet (Jealousy issues at work, being considered for a promotion, not him, etc.) So, basically Chrissy can no longer formulate her own opinion on anything. If Larry hates someone, so does she. If larry is negative all the time, so is she. If only Chrissy knew what Larry was really doing.... And now today at work, janet and i are outside talking, larry and chrissy join, larry is fuming about something that janet didnt do. Anyway, both janet and I get up and move to give them some privacy and to avoid a huge blowup. I go home and head on out to Chrissy's for dinner. Went fine until she brings up Janets name. To make an already long story short, Chrissy tells me the disdain she has for janet and how "Eventually you're going to have to choose sides." What kind of people are these?!?!?! What do I do???? I shouldnt have to choose sides just because I get along with everyone and they don't. Lame quote ahead: "Why cant we all get along?" I thank everyone for reading all of this. Link to post Share on other sites
Displaced Yankee Posted July 22, 2007 Share Posted July 22, 2007 Step away from the Drama!!! This situation is not worth the mental enery it took to read about it, much less live it. Next Chrissy and Larry break up, let her lick her own wounds. If anyone brings up the whole love relationship tangle, my response would be "Got no dog in that fight, best if I keep out of it" Displaced Yankee Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted July 22, 2007 Share Posted July 22, 2007 Janet needs to lose her phone on Crissy's desk Link to post Share on other sites
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