Why do women get so upset at their men who watch porn???

[rainfall]

Just curious as to why?

You know I can really can't understand how someone can become addicted to porn, but the quality of pornography in the past 5 years has gotten rediculous. Some of todays porn stars are significantly hotter and more real than hollywood film stars or pop stars. Most of the top selling actresses have real breasts, are trend-setting. Digital technologies have revolutionized the art (and I really do conscider it art). It's cheap to make too. If your man likes porn, you should concider making porn of you for him to watch. Solo, or with him. Whatever your willing to do, he'd treasure it undoubtably.

 

Because they are cheap and disgusting. Why should I respect someone who sleeps with men for money? They obviously have no repsect for themselves to live that way.

I have made porn for my man but it is just for him. It is not for 10000 of random people.

I really don't care how hot a porn chick is. If she spreads her legs for money she is not deserving of my respect.

[lonelybird]

I would like to ask all porn watcher a question.

 

*Do you agree your wife or your daughter to be a porn star? If not, why, reasons.

 

*If you don't like the idea that your own sister and daughter to be a porn star, and be watched and as a sitimuli as getting off by miliions men, then what make difference that other women do so, and you watch porn and get off? what difference is between other women and your own daughter and sisters, I mean to be a porn star?

 

How do you want others to treat your own daughter and sisters, you should treat other's daughter and sister the same. what go around what come around

[shadowofman]

Wife.......huge yes. I ask her everyso often. We plan on making our own for a membership website as soon as I get the rest of the equipment I need.

Daughter......no problem. (Though I'm never having children, got snipped when I was 25)

Mother.....I really don't care.

If I was a female, I would be a porn star and a prostitute (picky mind you). That is why I want my wife to be one. I have more respect for porn stars and prostitutes than I do for the women that marry for money or the Girls that Go Wild for tee shirts. (I don't disrespect them though). How can you call the cheap? They are expensive!

[lonelybird]

Wife.......huge yes. I ask her everyso often. We plan on making our own for a membership website as soon as I get the rest of the equipment I need.

Daughter......no problem. (Though I'm never having children, got snipped when I was 25)

Mother.....I really don't care.

You are impossible

[directx]

You are impossible

 

All is possible through God and Jesus Christ, right?

Looks like he has more faith than you...

[Hyperpen12000]

I think I did misinterpret what you said and I'm sorry. I know no one wants to actually be with someone leading the life of a porn star, but women don't view it as black and white as men do. Let me say that I not only tolerate porn, but I watch it myself. For me the issue isn't "you watch porn...gross". The issue is "you say it's not important, but it is". Obviously porn is important to guys, and granted 99% of men have control over their urges but women sacrifice a lot in a relationship, things men never realize and when you can't at least hear a girl out it makes them question their value in your eyes. I'm trying to be fair here, so yes men make sacrifices too, it seems this one is just too much for them. If you went out with a girl that liked to smoke but said it wasn't a big deal and you didn't like that you would want her to quit or at least a compromise. But instead she goes on about it being her body and you should just get over it...Or even worse lie to you about it, you can't say you wouldn't feel betrayed. Yes a lot of the problems come from insecurities, but if my bf were insecure about something I would do my best to bring him up, not tell him to "get over it".

 

Yes and that what I was saying with that statement’ I don’t believe he meant women who commit these acts are to be looked at as demeaning, but to give your female spouse some self-esteem and comfort to the issue by saying so.”

 

 

If I'm in a relationship to where my partner was smoking, which causes lung cancer, I would immediately leave. It's not the issue that porn is important, it's the issue of my partner telling me to get rid of something I enjoy viewing for her own morals. If I stopped watching everything she thought was morally wrong, I wouldn't have a life. I a lot of people love to have sex and watching it being preformed (especially guys). You have to look at it as black & white because guys don't think like some women do. We do enjoy watching things but wouldn't want to be apart of.

 

 

 

Explicit sex or violence in music T.V and movies is wrong, yet we still enjoy it! If you grew up enjoying things that people found immoral and someone came into you're life trying to prevent it, you would feel dictated! You're putting porn on too high of a pedestal. And by doing so, you're thinking he is too, but in his mind, it's an control issue.

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Daughter in law actually left because of my Son enjoyed porn.

Not a problem with me. She actually thought he fantasized actually wanting to have sex with that actress.

I like watching more than my husband, but I would never want to be with that person thats in the film. It's the act one enjoys. The performance.

Now days the porns have no plot. Years ago the was a story. But they're all gang bangs now.

 

She caught him once in the bathroom masterbating to a picture and had an all out fit. Jealous? Yep BIG TIME.

 

That's what a lot of people don't understand, It's the performance. Watching from the "outside in" is intriguing, especially if you love sex!. The people who have it under control don't want to be with the actor or actress on the video. Some people just need to stop being the thought police.

 

 

I would like to ask all porn watcher a question.

 

*Do you agree your wife or your daughter to be a porn star? If not, why, reasons.

 

*If you don't like the idea that your own sister and daughter to be a porn star, and be watched and as a sitimuli as getting off by miliions men, then what make difference that other women do so, and you watch porn and get off? what difference is between other women and your own daughter and sisters, I mean to be a porn star?

 

How do you want others to treat your own daughter and sisters, you should treat other's daughter and sister the same. what go around what come around

 

*Do you agree with your Wife and Daughter starving or not having a place to sleep? If not, why don't you help the deprivation in some communities. *Do you believe that children shouldn't be without parents? If so, why don't you adopt 5 or 6 children into your home?

 

*Do you believe that your wife and daughter shouldn't be incited to commit violent acts? If so, open up a place where boys and girls can receive positives support so they can be likely to not commit those acts.

 

When it comes down to it, those women and MEN choose to be Adult film starts. We have no control over that! They know what kind of accommodation comes with that choice of lifestyle. We accept the reality but don't commend it to our own. I know that sounds hypocritical but so does everything else we do.

 

I guess what goes around comes around even for people who turn away from the poor and innocent children who still should be given a chance.

[doiask42much]

Just curious as to why?

You know I can really can't understand how someone can become addicted to porn, but the quality of pornography in the past 5 years has gotten rediculous. Some of todays porn stars are significantly hotter and more real than hollywood film stars or pop stars. Most of the top selling actresses have real breasts, are trend-setting.

 

I really don't think that being with more than 20 men (unless they were all at the same time ) makes one a slut. I'm sure there is some number at which it's too many, but 20 ain't it.

 

I, too, find the women in porn somewhat disgusting and have no respect for them, but that doesn't mean I find it wholly unappealing. One can be drawn to/aroused by things they do not admire or even find repugnant. Like you said, degradation, though seemingly a bad thing, can be arousing for some.

 

Which porn stars are you talking about that are hotter than hollywood film stars or pop stars? Please don't say Jenna Jameson. She NASTY. I've rarely/never? seen any porn stars that I thought were the total package in terms of facial beauty and perfectly proportioned bodies that were natural. No one I'd look at and be like, wow, I wish I could trade bodies. Some are actually downright gross, but maybe I've been watching bargain basement porn, as I said earlier.

 

In a way I view them as entertainers whose bodies are sacrificed for my viewing pleasure, much the way gladiators were in Roman times. It's callous and awful, but that's the truth. Many of the porn "stars" out there aren't stars, have no security, and do this stuff to fund a drug habit. (JJ had a big time meth problem.) It's easy for men to not consider the realities of porn simply because they enjoy the product. Sure, some women are contract and in control of what they do, but the vast majority are not.

[doiask42much]

And yes, I agree with rainfall, porn is a lazy way to make money instead of getting an education and/or a real job. Why should we respect lazy wh*res, no matter what they look like? I wouldn't respect a man if he did that either. In fact, I'd probably look upon him even more harshly than I would a woman.

[Hyperpen12000]

I really don't think that being with more than 20 men (unless they were all at the same time ) makes one a slut. I'm sure there is some number at which it's too many, but 20 ain't it.

 

I, too, find the women in porn somewhat disgusting and have no respect for them, but that doesn't mean I find it wholly unappealing. One can be drawn to/aroused by things they do not admire or even find repugnant. Like you said, degradation, though seemingly a bad thing, can be arousing for some.

 

Which porn stars are you talking about that are hotter than hollywood film stars or pop stars? Please don't say Jenna Jameson. She NASTY. I've rarely/never? seen any porn stars that I thought were the total package in terms of facial beauty and perfectly proportioned bodies that were natural. No one I'd look at and be like, wow, I wish I could trade bodies. Some are actually downright gross, but maybe I've been watching bargain basement porn, as I said earlier.

 

In a way I view them as entertainers whose bodies are sacrificed for my viewing pleasure, much the way gladiators were in Roman times. It's callous and awful, but that's the truth. Many of the porn "stars" out there aren't stars, have no security, and do this stuff to fund a drug habit. (JJ had a big time meth problem.) It's easy for men to not consider the realities of porn simply because they enjoy the product. Sure, some women are contract and in control of what they do, but the vast majority are not.

20 penises or vaginas that you've had in intercourse or orally is not a slut? Wow. I guess we all have are definition of sluts and whores. Guess you have to hit 50 or 100 mark to be consider one nowadays.

 

I wouldn't want to sleep with 20 women, let alone 10. You can gain experience with just 1 person.

[Love is Tragic]

Im a frequent porn-watcher, so i personally dont have any issues with it, lol.. I could see being upset if it was taking over your life, or your significant others life, but other than that, its cool by me. I actually watch much more porn than my husband does anyway(maybe hes on this forum somewhere bitching about my watching too much, haha). Hell, watch it together, makes it fun!

[cn283]

Hyperpen12000,

 

It's not just a black and white issue. I brought up smoking as a comparison. If she is smoking no where near you, and she thinks she has it under control and doesn't feel you have the right to tell her to stop doing something she enjoys...she's giving you the same argument for porn. That was my point. Why should she quit for your morals? At the same time if you meant that much to her, I'm sure she would at least attempt to quit, or be like a guy and hide it...Most of the time it's not just about a woman trying to control your every move, (although on this forum you see a lot of it) it's about a woman feeling second class to something even you have little respect for. If you would rather get off watching someone you could care less about than spending time with someone you claim to care about, of course a woman is going to freak out! Yeah, a lot of it could be insecurities and I hear a lot of women knocking porn stars just because of their living. That's their choice and if they make good money from faking an orgasm for guys she could care less about...more power to her. I mean hell, it's not even really about the porn, it's about common decency and respect in a relationship.

 

Oh and did I forget to mention honesty, communication and compromise is good for relationships too? They are.

[lonelybird]

In heaven there are no place for adulterers. "when you look at woman with lust in your heart, you already committed adultery", in heaven's definition

 

Heartly repent, sin no more, you can get chance

 

Hell is not a place for fun:eek:. Yes, hell does exist, many people who died and returned saw the hell. We have souls as human being, after our physical body died, our soul go to a place, or heaven or hell.

 

Feed your physical desires, your physical desires grow; but your spiritual side dwindle.

[Hyperpen12000]

Hyperpen12000,

 

It's not just a black and white issue. I brought up smoking as a comparison. If she is smoking no where near you, and she thinks she has it under control and doesn't feel you have the right to tell her to stop doing something she enjoys...she's giving you the same argument for porn. That was my point. Why should she quit for your morals? At the same time if you meant that much to her, I'm sure she would at least attempt to quit, or be like a guy and hide it...Most of the time it's not just about a woman trying to control your every move, (although on this forum you see a lot of it) it's about a woman feeling second class to something even you have little respect for. If you would rather get off watching someone you could care less about than spending time with someone you claim to care about, of course a woman is going to freak out! Yeah, a lot of it could be insecurities and I hear a lot of women knocking porn stars just because of their living. That's their choice and if they make good money from faking an orgasm for guys she could care less about...more power to her. I mean hell, it's not even really about the porn, it's about common decency and respect in a relationship.

 

Oh and did I forget to mention honesty, communication and compromise is good for relationships too? They are.

 

Insecurity freaks a woman out. Like someone said on this forum, if you're getting deprived sex by your GF/wife and you want to stimulate you're, why should you restraint yourself twice as much when that was your way of stimulating yourself when you wasn't in a relastionship? Some guys need a visual and porn gets the job done. Some guys don't masturbate. They just enjoy the the porn for entertainment. If it's not for religious reasons, why stop watching something you enjoy? Out of respect you say?? What if you don't want your BF/husband watching UFC fighting because it's too violent? Does he suppose to stop out of respect for the relationship? What if he's watching a sitcom and he admires a female actress from it.... Out of respect again? If your BF/Husband is not letting it interfere with your sex life or quality time, then the issue is with you. Forcing your mate to take away something he/she really enjoys and has under control (which isn't going to inflict significant harm) is a bit selfish.

 

Doing it for you out of common decency and respect is saying I want you to stop enjoying what I disapprove of. If he does cut down and hide the porn out of respect for you, I'm sure down the line you'll still want him to eliminate it completely. Self-consciously you know he still watches it and will want him to quit.

 

 

In heaven there are no place for adulterers. "when you look at woman with lust in your heart, you already committed adultery", in heaven's definition

 

Heartly repent, sin no more, you can get chance

 

Hell is not a place for fun:eek:. Yes, hell does exist, many people who died and returned saw the hell. We have souls as human being, after our physical body died, our soul go to a place, or heaven or hell.

 

Feed your physical desires, your physical desires grow; but your spiritual side dwindle.

 

If you're quitting for religious reason then it's understandable. We have to give up all carnal pleasures for the LORD. Giving up Pork, unhealthy foods, hearing, speaking, and seeing no evil. No sin is greater than another. Only GOD can judge.

[cn283]

Wow, you totally didn't get what I said...

 

Well, lets try this again. I'm not telling my boyfriend to stop masturbating or watch porn. I'm asking him to at least consider me when he does it so I'm not left high and dry. It may be hard to believe because of stereotypes, but women like sex too! Sure there are those "people" out there, but women are just as sexual and horny as guys. You keep bringing up violent movies...if I were against them (which I'm not) what does that have to do with my sex life? This isn't about stripping a man of the things he's loves in life, its about the normal give and take of a relationship. If my porn use was getting in the way of his sex life or affecting his self esteem, I would listen and try to change for the better of the relationship. And that goes for any problem! Why is this so hard of a concept? It transcends porn, it goes for problems in general. Not a power trip!

[doiask42much]

20 penises or vaginas that you've had in intercourse or orally is not a slut? Wow. I guess we all have are definition of sluts and whores. Guess you have to hit 50 or 100 mark to be consider one nowadays.

 

I wouldn't want to sleep with 20 women, let alone 10. You can gain experience with just 1 person.

 

Wow? What's wow is your hypocrisy. Porn actresses have been with way more than 20 and you enjoy watching them add to that tally. But a person who isn't even paid to do that and has been with 21 guys, wow, watch out. STUPID.

[shadowofman]

There is no proof that a soul exists. Nor ghosts, fairies, spiritual planes of existance where said ghosts and fairies may exist, or even sins. So I will not waste this thread with a debate on that issue.

A celebrety that endorses a product like Pepsi is a lazy whore by that definition. I don't see any rational reason to have disrespect for adult film stars. How is it not a real job in any definition of the word. Even drug dealer is a real job and a hell of alot harder than most people care to think. Just because you have an inspired moral objection to it doesn't make it easy, lazy. Robbery, yes; porn acting, no way! They don't compare.

Jenna Jameson is way old news (and has a sacrificed body no doubt).

Taylor Rayne, Jenna Oso, Teagan Presley, Belladonna, Kari Sable, I could go on and on. I'd trade my body for Taylor's.

[Hyperpen12000]

Wow, you totally didn't get what I said...

 

Well, lets try this again. I'm not telling my boyfriend to stop masturbating or watch porn. I'm asking him to at least consider me when he does it so I'm not left high and dry. It may be hard to believe because of stereotypes, but women like sex too! Sure there are those "people" out there, but women are just as sexual and horny as guys. You keep bringing up violent movies...if I were against them (which I'm not) what does that have to do with my sex life? This isn't about stripping a man of the things he's loves in life, its about the normal give and take of a relationship. If my porn use was getting in the way of his sex life or affecting his self esteem, I would listen and try to change for the better of the relationship. And that goes for any problem! Why is this so hard of a concept? It transcends porn, it goes for problems in general. Not a power trip!

 

Wow! and you didn't get what I said.

 

If your BF/Husband is not letting it interfere with your sex life or quality time, what's the problem? I first post states that! Forcing your mate to take away something he/she really enjoys and has under control is wrong.

 

If you let your self-esteem always determine if someone loves you and cares about you, you need to work on yourself. NO one can make you feel good about yourself but you. That's why it's called SELF-esteem not RELINING-ON-OTHERS-TO-MAKE-ME-FEEL-GOOD-ABOUT-MYSELF-esteem. If he's not letting it interfere with the relationship. If he's hiding it and keeping it out of your view because you disagree with it, that's understandable! I do understand that part of what you're saying.

 

(Speaking in general) To ask him to get ride of it all together is a blow to his interest and enjoyment. He starts to think, "what else can I not do or view because I have to do it out of respect for her?" He'll automatically feel that you're depriving him of what he finds enjoyable which is a sign of control. but I know you're not saying that....

[Hyperpen12000]

Wow? What's wow is your hypocrisy. Porn actresses have been with way more than 20 and you enjoy watching them add to that tally. But a person who isn't even paid to do that and has been with 21 guys, wow, watch out. STUPID.

 

Was that a Derogatory comment towards me? The Stupid part? Those porn starts are whores too. You can take the word "whore" what ever way you want to; vulgar or a lifestyle. To think I'm saying otherwise is to put words in my mouth. I respect professional whores or volunteer ones. You love to have sex.... AND?..... You're still a human being!!! Some people on here will call that being an animal but I don't.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And 20 partners are more than enough for a male or female.

[doiask42much]

sorry for the stupid part. strike it from the record! heh.

 

i guess i think it's up to the person themselves to determine how many is enough. for some it could be five, for others it might take more. i, too, judge people. not trying to say i don't. i just don't start judging till the numbers get crazy. 20-something isn't crazy, unless you're 20 years old. i don't think it's abnormal to rack up a few over the course of a lifetime.

 

some people are lucky to find "the one" right away. a lot of us are not so lucky and settle for whatever in the meantime.

[doiask42much]

 

And 20 partners are more than enough for a male or female.

 

I guess I think that's like telling fat people that one helping of food is enough and that they shouldn't be eating fries. That may well be true, but it's still their body and up to them to decide, even at the expense of their own well-being.

[Carbine]

I love this quote! I think people often discount that women can be very visual too. I myself am, just as much as any man, I'd say.

Haha I didn't actually mean this to be funny, it's just that I find the whole 'visual creatures' thing so utterly ridiculous that I'm compelled to ask questions like that. I mean, if there was actually some legitimate scientific evidence to support the claim that men are visual creatures, it wouldn't be such a laughable argument.

 

Bottom line is, we all choose what to be sensitive to.

What you're saying is that women like myself chose to be sensitive to stimuli in the environment which damage our self esteem? I don't see how that works. If this were the case, then we'd simply be able to 'get over it' and there wouldn't be any need for threads like this. Wrestling is completely different to porn. Sensitivity to wrestling is to do with sensitivity to violence, sensitivity to porn is to to do with sensitivity to infidelity. Two very different things.

[doiask42much]

 

 

What you're saying is that women like myself chose to be sensitive to stimuli in the environment which damage our self esteem? I don't see how that works. If this were the case, then we'd simply be able to 'get over it' and there wouldn't be any need for threads like this. Wrestling is completely different to porn. Sensitivity to wrestling is to do with sensitivity to violence, sensitivity to porn is to to do with sensitivity to infidelity. Two very different things.

 

wow, you make so many excellent points! when i first read hyperpen's comment about UFC, i was like huh, true, but now that i read your counterargument, i realize it's not true. gosh, i'm so easily swayed!

 

but yes, how we react to things is not a choice; it's a defense mechanism based on some kind of past trauma. if you had been violently abused, you'd probably have a visceral negative reaction to wrestling or other violent content.

[doiask42much]

and to say we choose to react how we do totally discounts what caused the reaction, a sensitivity to infidelity, as you said. though i have no proof of anyone cheating on me personally (other than one person i didn't care about and had already done the same to), i have witnessed other people cheating as i was growing up (my father, my uncle, et al.) so i do have SOME sensitivity to it, though not as much as some.

[Hyperpen12000]

What you're saying is that women like myself chose to be sensitive to stimuli in the environment which damage our self esteem? I don't see how that works. If this were the case, then we'd simply be able to 'get over it' and there wouldn't be any need for threads like this. Wrestling is completely different to porn. Sensitivity to wrestling is to do with sensitivity to violence, sensitivity to porn is to to do with sensitivity to infidelity. Two very different things.

 

I don't know what the heck you are talking about the in first few sentences.

 

Wrestling and Porn are two different things but it's equivalent when it comes to sensitivity. If you're open to it, you wouldn't exclaim about how wrong it is.

 

Though this forum was about why women have a problem with porn, a lot of guys and women are trying to give other women a better understanding to why guys enjoy porn (who have it under control). We're trying to give you a man's perspective but you're oblivious to it, transfiguring it into something animalistic, disrespectful, uncontrollable, and degrading towards women. If it's degrading then sex itself is too because there are guys in porn too.

 

You should have a problem if your mate is obsessed with lesbian porn. That may signify he is into it for the women and not the enjoyment of heterosexual sex.

 

When a guy hears, "I don't want you watching porn, looking at other women" or "I don't want you watching sex while you're in a relationship with me". We profoundly think of insecurity and control. Like I said before, it's called SELF-esteem not RELINING-ON-OTHERS-TO-MAKE-ME-FEEL-GOOD-ABOUT-MYSELF-esteem.

 

It's okay to watch violence because it doesn't challenge your insecurity as a woman but it's not okay to watch sex because it does. You're desensitizing violence over sex! If a guy, who has it under control, always has to cater to your needs, then the relationship is all about you.

[Hyperpen12000]

I don't see the problem with "getting off" by watching someone else have sex (if you have it under control). That's what most people watch porn for. The enjoyment of watching someone else have sex; included with fantasized scenarios.

 

Most of you who disagree in likelihood have a problem with your BF/husband getting off to another womens vagina, which is understandable. If that's the case, take pictures of your own vagina so when you're not in the mood, he has a visual of your vagina right there. Compromise!