He contacted me (follow up to Enough!)

[McFadden]

funkybassplayer, you are right, no one was accusatory in this thread at all. I actually meant to post that part in another thread, but I'm an idiot. I'll edit that out.

 

dr strangelove, sorry if the situation is starting to get boring but its not really for entertainment anyway. I think it it does make sense for me not to reply while he has a girlfriend, that is just setting myself up to be gravy on the side or something. My ex is only interested right now because he can't get me to talk to him and he thinks I don't want anything to do with him. If I tell him I love him and want a second chance, he will get bored again. So I keep the chase going until he gets serious enough about it go get rid of his girlfriend. Then even if he does I have to permenantly keep him thinking theres a chase going on.

[funkybassplayer]

dont mean to sound hard, but if he will only get with you as he cant have you, then even if he does get back with you it will only be cos he won the chase, and then will get bored, and if you love him, then your gonna get hurt again! even more i guess than now, maybe drop him and the other one, and find some1 who wants you for the right reason. move on and start again................but then, what do i know!!

[frd150]

Yeah McFadden......

 

Chipotle is like crack. Sitting here eating it now.

 

Vegie bowl All rice, Fajita veggies. Mild, Medium,and corn salsa. You wont even miss the meat. Make sure you get chips.

[McFadden]

Yeah, I used to like the steak burritos with sour cream, cheese and guac. I used to eat those every day. Then I noticed that I was getting fat on my midsection and I slowly started switching over to the bowls. That was around the time I was with my ex and he had the audacity to make comments about me gaining weight after we got together. And then now he is with a girl who is twice the size of me. She's like 5"3 140lbs, and you can tell she doesn't work out. I'm not even kidding.

 

What an a-hole. Its completely true that there is no point in having anything to do with him because he always gets bored with people. He always said he wants to get married and have a family and I think, whats he going to do when he gets married and his wife is pregnant and stuff then all of the sudden it isn't new and he's sick of her.

 

I read through the thread and I realized that I got too defensive in this thread and another thread that I made. It turns out what happened is one person rubbed me the wrong way in another thread, so I lashed out. Sorry!

[frd150]

Oh don't get me wrong i still get the steak and chicken but since the break up i have lost around 20 lbs. I figure i need to eat veggie at least 3 out of the five times a week that i eat there. I guess it's better that being addicted to alchohol and drugs. Yup, now it's the gym and then next door to chipotle.

 

Back on the subject......

 

Funny you should mention your weight issue. If you look at back at my posts(if your board) You will find that my ex had a hormone problem and her weight varied. She is around 5'4" and about a year ago she got up to 145. She is lucky in that she carries alot of muscle due to the gymnastics she used to do. Honestly i never really noticed or cared. She does not understand that my love was/is without condition. One arm,one leg with a kickstand and 200 lbs. I loved her no matter what.Love is blind. I guess as you get older the things you look for in someone just change or at least the order of importance. She was the ONE i knew it so i started to work harder and longer so that i could buy the ring and then a bigger home for us. STUPID me while i was doing all of this she mis interpreted and thought i was growing distant. No fighting no insults no cheating i was devoted and My explanation was not good enough.

 

 

I will not bore you with the details up until now since you can go back and read. I am now in a somewhat similar situation. About a month ago she and i had a status talk instigated by me. In this conversation she told me that she wanted to be on her own and that she could not marry me...Ah ok.So like you i got a life, got busy and went straight into no contact. It only took four days and then she started to call for no particular reason. I would only answer after a few attempts because i still truly love this girl in spite of what she did to me and. I figure that if she is making all of these attempts then somthing might be wrong and she needs me. Nope she just wants to talk. This has been on going. What is this leading up to??

 

 

So you see i under stand the confusion that you in now. The vets here at LS have given me some solid advice which i am trying my best to follow. It is very hard at times.What i have done is take a bit from everyone and use it to benifit my situation. Some people can shake the sickness faster then others and i am not one of them, at least this time. Thats why i come back here.

 

 

Your right in that your posts are not for our entertainment so post all you want it is our choice wether or not to respond. Its a good way to get it out.

 

 

I am concerned for you as others are. He has a girlfriend, enough said and you are hearing it over and over again here. This new guy you are seeing, does he not show relationship potential? I dunno.

[McFadden]

I know it was not that tasteful for me to throw the weight issue into it especially because 5"3 140 some lbs is not extremely overweight. The only reason I bring it up it is that while I was with my ex he would make weight related comments to me and when I was eating junk food he would actually try to take it away, complaining that I was going to gain weight. I am over 5"8 and I was never over 145lbs with 12-15% body fat which is athletic as far as I know.

 

Now, he is 'dating' a girl who is obviously overweight and has a beer belly, looks like she doesn't care about her appearance. (I said 'dating' because she lives in another state and never sees him). It bothers me that he thinks thats ok for her but never would have put up with that from me. I know people will say "you shouldn't care" ect, but I think that would irk most people.

 

With the new guy, the problem is he is almost 27 but he is really immature to the point where he is more immature than me. He is clear about the fact that his lifestyle is going to continue to be the way it is forever and he's not going to want to be in a traditional relationship, and I may want to be at some point. He isn't trying to get in the way of me meeting other people though, so I don't see any reason to break it off when we have a good thing going.

 

I also listen to a lot of the advice on LS (case in point I have been in NC for 5 months, and I had never heard of NC before LS) but I combine that in with the advice I get from people in real life, because the advice from many LSers all tends to have kind of a theme to it. Not that LS is not right but if you go different places people will come to different consensuses. I comprehend he has a girlfriend, but she will be out of the picture at some point, I don't know why it is mandatory that the door on the whole thing remains shut forever. He is making a mistake by pursuing other people while he has a gf but it happens, its not like I haven't done such a thing.

 

I am bored right now so I am probably going to go back and stalk frd150's threads in hopes that Chipotle is mentioned in them.

[McFadden]

Yeah I was reading those other posts. I liked that one time when Caliguy said not to let them see you sweat and suffer, ect.

 

A lot of random shyt involving my ex and other people went down today and tonight, and it wasn't anything I instigated. I thought about not posting it because people are tired of the situation. But I just feel like writing it down, and if no one wants to read it they don't have to. I'm going to make a different thread.