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I have came to find that I have a problem with expressing myself. Now dont get me wrong, I can express my love just fine. Its my anger and dislikes and hates that I cannot express. It dont matter if its a lover, friend, someone at work, or what it is. I just cannot do it.

I have been the type to try to make everyone happy and if it comes down to where I go as far to sacrfice myself. Makeing other people happy aint a bad thing, its just I go way too far with it. I cannot hurt anyone. If someone says something I dont like, I cant just tell them, look thats bull... I just clam up and dont say anything.

Right now I have this lady living with me that manages to piss me off alot. She has noticed the way I am and just took controll over me and everything around me. I can't just tell her to go get bent because I need her help to take care of my grandmother when I'm at work. This lady has no right to and no reason to do what she dose to me, yet I let her. I don't wana hear her rude and hateful remarks about everything anymore. I don't want her keeping me from doing what I wana do anymore. My love life is actually suffering because this lady just wants to control me. She wants me to be with her to be honest and its not gona happen. She is keeping me from the woman I love for herself. Its selfish and full of jelousy. I'm haveing problems with my girl friend right now because we cant be as close as I wana be, I keep paceing and retraceing everything. I cant have my GF where I want her because this lady wont have that. She told me the other day when I was talking to her, some how or another we got onto the subject but either way, she flat out told me that if I asked her to move out she was gona beat my ass before she left. What the hell? I dunno what to even mention next, but I need help. maybe a head doc...

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