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Was it really love?


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Ok so how can you tell if someone does really love you? but they are so messed up in the head that they cant communicate it and end up messing you arround? im not looking to make excuses for my ex i just want to know if it either was real? if if im still in love with a person that never really existed!

 

Ill try and keep it short:

 

We met online, i had just found out i was pregnant, within a week we were so smitten head over heels in love. He supported me through a misscarrage, and ain becoming homless we found a flat together.

2 days before we were due to move in he cancelled on me and split up saying he wasnt ready, and then came crawling back to say it was cos i never beliveed i was good enough for him?

1 month later me having found myself a home we split again he cancelled on all family plans over xmas, and basically shut off, All over xmas we argued, he was so so nasty. The suddenly he wanted to see me and new year we got back together.

2 Months later out of the blue he left me, turns out he had been cheating on me...he flipped and never have i seen himbe so nasty. i tried so hard for 2 months to get over him, and was getting there when i bumped into him in town... suddenly he was grovelling he spent a month begging me back, i was weak and although in little ways he kept letting me down i gave in, things were wonderful, he wanted to move in , propose... but he still hide me from his mates and family! Suddenly out of the blue he splits with me.. blaming a drug habit, and within one week has a new gf! he still spent a week telling me he loved me and then suddenly says he hates me and wants to call the police cos im a stalker! I deleted his number and havent spoken to him in 5 days!

 

god when i right it out like this.......it was all words wasnt it... i think he does have feelings but cos im such an easy target he knows im there till something better comes allong he likes the challange.....

 

god what has happened to me! i never get walked all over!

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amaysngrace

You met him at a bad time in your life. That's all. Don't beat yourself up worse than the hits you've already taken.

 

Personally I think that your life being a mess is what drew him to you in the first place. I always attract the biggest losers when I am going through a rough patch.

 

If he was a keeper you'd have met him when you were flying high and on top of your game.

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funkybassplayer

Lose this jerk now! take time out for yourself, be single for a bit, and then when you have confidence, then its right to go for it. Until then, you have to try and stay in n/c otherwise any tiny thing from him will mess you up, he knows it too. Then grieve for the loss (which you will) and move on. You will see him in a different light not long from now, but while you feel vunerable, you are open to his attack. You may have been or still are in love, but i love snakes, but would'nt want one in my house!

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he still spent a week telling me he loved me and then suddenly says he hates me and wants to call the police cos im a stalker!

 

Wait..is your ex my ex as well?!

 

You know, I've spent months wondering whether my ex really loved me or if it was just all words, especially knowing how changeable he is.

 

Personally in the case of my ex, I think he thought he loved me but it's not what 'normal' people woould call love, it was more of a manipulative, controlling kind of thing.

 

You'll probably never find out if your ex really loved you but the best thing to do is move on and forget him - he'll onyl keep messing with you.

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Your right guys he does know he has this hold, cos te moment i try and back off he chases me, or uts his oar in, but if i come to him he freaks!

I have done 5 days N/C all the while he is falling for his new gf! (who is young and they done se each other all the time!) he works like that nevr se him and he wants you but then if i was busy i would be made to feel guilty! so i gave in and then it ultimatly pushed him away!

last night he IM'd me just tobasically shove pics of him and his mrs under my nose... i dint rise to it and turned my comp off, But ouch!!!!!!!!!

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