Sex Question

[Moai]

Religious people in the Judeo/Christian/Islamic tradition are taught that sex itself is sinful. Of late, that is relaxing some, but it is still there.

 

I would say that "religious" people don't universally think that sex is bad. Hindus have a great relationship/sex manual called the "Kama Sutra" that addresses just about every issue imaginable. How the first wife should treat the second, etc.

 

Sexual mores are determined by culture. There is one culture where one woman has many husbands, and they are happy and peaceful. They think that it is bad luck for one woman to have more than three children by one man. Her first husband selects all her others. For them, one sexual partner for life is a silly, unholy idea. That doesn't mean that we should emulate them, but it does suggest that sexual morals are to a major extent learned, not innate. There is no "plan" or "law" about sex.

 

There are cultures where one man has many wives. And there are cultures where one man is expected to have only one wife and be faithful to her. But that is more about marriage, I suppose, than sex itself.

 

Here is a link where a sect claims that polygamy is biblical, for example:

 

http://www.biblicalpolygamy.com/

 

Here's another:

 

http://www.truthbearer.org/

 

As in everything, the Bible can be made to support just about any position.

 

But back to the point. In my experience, and I stress it is only my experience, the most religious people I know are the most uptight about sex. I think that it comes from the idea that sex is of the flesh, and the flesh is sinful, and therefore can lead you astray, is bad, yadda yadda yadda.

 

I think some of it has to do with men wanting to be sure who the father of their children is, to put it bluntly.

 

I read about a tribe in Africa where the men had no problem with other men sleeping with their wives, but if you had a meal with them it was worth killing over--literally. Sharing a meal means more than sex. Again, morality is determined by culture.

 

From a biological perspective, human females are the only organism on the planet that has an organ specifically for pleasure. It is clear that women enjoying sexual behavior is a good thing as far as survival is concerned. The more a woman wants/ enjoys sex, the more offspring she will have, and the more members of your tribe can go and get food and fight off the enemy, etc.

 

Chimpanzees mercilessly destroy the "unfaithful" by the way. It is not just a human thing, all apes have it. They best to death (and consume) those who break their moral codes. Morality seems to evolve with the group.

 

It seems also that most people who say you can't be happy enjoying a free sexual lifestyle don't enjoy that freedom themselves, nor have they ever tried it. The fact is sex takes up 6% of your life (but almost 100% of your thoughts!) so it is no big deal. Don't do anything you don't want to and if it makes you feel bad don't do it again, and you're aces. It just sucks that people who are wigged out about sex demand everyone else be, too.

[ZachsGirl026]

Not to be rude, but how does "Why do some religious people think sex is dirty?" specify that it is talking about sex within a marriage? Or just Christianity for that matter? Besides I was giving my opinion on the subject, I don't think that's wrong. I am a Christian, but I sin. I'm sure you do too. None of us are perfect and I personally believe that God is forgiving and understanding. He knows we're not perfect and I don't think in the big scheme of things that sex in a committed long-term relationship is number one on his list of unforgivable sins. Just my opinion.

[lonelybird]

Not to be rude, but how does "Why do some religious people think sex is dirty?" specify that it is talking about sex within a marriage? Or just Christianity for that matter? Besides I was giving my opinion on the subject, I don't think that's wrong. I am a Christian, but I sin. I'm sure you do too. None of us are perfect and I personally believe that God is forgiving and understanding. He knows we're not perfect and I don't think in the big scheme of things that sex in a committed long-term relationship is number one on his list of unforgivable sins. Just my opinion.

the bold part, if you go to heaven, you have to pay attention to what EXACTLY God says, not what we think

 

Lord said "if you love me, you will obey my commandment"

[shadowofman]

Ahhhh.... lonelybird...you are too funny!

I want to concure with most of moai's comment but I refute a few things.

Chimpanzees mercilessly destroy the "unfaithful" by the way. It is not just a human thing, all apes have it. They best to death (and consume) those who break their moral codes. Morality seems to evolve with the group.

False! Chimanzees are completely promiscuous and experience sex with every member of their tribe, often females take on males one after the other, all day. Of course this is only when the female is ovulating. Gorillas are not as tolerant and would most likely wound any rival males. Orangs are solitary and only mate on rare encounters for the purposes of procreation. Humans tend to pair bond, but are ultimately promiscuous naturally. A minority of cultures teach that sex is dirty, it just so happens that the Abrahamic Three are dominating the planet through very nafarious means. First the crusades, now Islamic extremists. Pull out your good books people, then burn your holy ones.

I believe that these few religions us excuses like "sin of the flesh" and whatnot, but the ulimate goal is for a man to control his woman. Most of the history of these cultures is riddled with women being executed for adultery will men are barely if at all punished. I believe and see evidence that it's ultimate purpose is male supremacy. The peace of mind that it's my baby she is carrying. Religions, like languages, evolve over time. It all depends on the zeitgeist, which direction religious teachings will take. Paul's ramblings were doomed to fail, because it goes against our nature to the core.

[Love Hurts]

wrong page

[disgracian]

False! Chimanzees are completely promiscuous and experience sex with every member of their tribe, often females take on males one after the other, all day.

That doesn't invalidate what Maoi said at all, unless you have this bizarre idea that there is an absolute standard of morality and that we (humans) have it.

 

Cheers,

D.

[Love Hurts]

Why do some religious people think sex is dirty?

Adulterers used to be stoned to death. On this side if the cross they are free to divorce- and -fornication is still a sin.

[sandybelle]

Why do some religious people think sex is dirty?

 

The answer is simple: they're just being PRACTICAL! Better said our

predecesors who came with "sex is dirty" idea were practical.

 

Just think about it ... houndreds of years ago there was no birth control to prevent against unwanted pregnancies nor medications (like antibiotics) to cure STDs. At that time it was very risky to have sex with more than one partner.

 

"Sex is dirty" was invented and stayed with humanity for centuries as a way of self preservation. However times have changes and so should we.

[a4a]

For producing babies, and husband and wife should become one

 

So if you have a married couple that know they cannot reproduce because of infertility issues..... they are having sex simply for the pleasure.... is this now a sin?

[Moai]

Ahhhh.... lonelybird...you are too funny!

I want to concure with most of moai's comment but I refute a few things.

 

False! Chimanzees are completely promiscuous and experience sex with every member of their tribe, often females take on males one after the other, all day.

 

I beg to differ. You are referring to Bonobos. I have seen footage of chimps beating to death and consuming a female who approached the mate of another.

 

Bonobos, on the other hand, have sex with each other almost constantly, in every combination imaginable--including amongst members of the same sex. I think the only taboo they have is son-mother incest. That's off the top of my head, though. It's funny, but Bonobos use sex as a confict resolution tool as well, and sre non-violent. Chimps are incredibly dangerous, both to other social groups and to each other--and to us.

 

As a side note, rape is common in the ape world (except for Bonobos, of course). Orangutans have raped human females.

 

Of course this is only when the female is ovulating.

Bonobos have sex regardless of whether the female is ovulating or not.

 

Gorillas are not as tolerant and would most likely wound any rival males. Orangs are solitary and only mate on rare encounters for the purposes of procreation. Humans tend to pair bond, but are ultimately promiscuous naturally. A minority of cultures teach that sex is dirty, it just so happens that the Abrahamic Three are dominating the planet through very nafarious means. First the crusades, now Islamic extremists. Pull out your good books people, then burn your holy ones.

Very true, although I think one mate for life is a good idea. The happiest people I know have beenmarried 50+ years, but they didn't get married for the reasons people seem to now. I've never been married so I don't really know. And, that is also the dominant idea of my culture. I am sure if I lived in Dubai or something the idea of one wife would be stupid and against all nature.

 

I believe that these few religions us excuses like "sin of the flesh" and whatnot, but the ulimate goal is for a man to control his woman. Most of the history of these cultures is riddled with women being executed for adultery will men are barely if at all punished. I believe and see evidence that it's ultimate purpose is male supremacy. The peace of mind that it's my baby she is carrying. Religions, like languages, evolve over time. It all depends on the zeitgeist, which direction religious teachings will take. Paul's ramblings were doomed to fail, because it goes against our nature to the core.

The denia of sexuality is a human trait only, true, but I think it goes beyond religion and is a destructive meme all by itself. It just uses religion as a host in many cases. Danial Dennett gace a great lecture about this at TED recently. http://www.ted.com has it if you are interested.