I know this is shady... but desperate times call for desperate measures.

[zilverenvlinder]

I need to get into his My Space account.

 

I know, I know. Sneaky. Low. But if I'm going to plan to marry this man, I have to know what's going on.

 

Just today, I was going downstairs to pee and he didn't see me... he was on the computer. He was on his My Space messages and I startled him, and he quickly exited out. He didn't exit out fast enough, however, for me to see the picture icons of all of his messagees... women.

 

If anyone has experience using one of these "password hacking" services, I would like to know which ones actually work. I've found a few of them on Google and want to know which ones are real and if any are scams.

 

I know I'm going to get criticized and flamed, but I'm at my wit's end. I'm not a paranoid person, either, and I'm really not jealous, but I cannot handle the fact that I would be marrying someone next year who constantly flirts/hooks up with other women. I want to marry someone who is respectful to me and respectful of my wishes.

 

What should I do? I can't talk to him about it... deny, deny. Another option I had was creating a fake account, but that would take time in order for it to LOOK real and I'm not sure I have the balls to go through with that.

 

Any help is appreciated highly.

 

Thank you.

[dbtmarley]

If the two of you are living together and have plans to marry why not ask him for it? Or better yet ask him to remove the account period. Myspace is such a problem in relationships in my opinion. What does he need it for? To keep in contact with friends? He can use the phone for that..

 

Tell him to ditch the myspace account. It is so not necessary.

[underpants]

Just confront him. You don't have to be all mean and dramatic (although I know it can be difficult to have composure when emotions are involved).

 

Sit him down and tell him that you are concerned about the issue of trust in this relationship. Be honest and direct with him, try to remain calm and let him talk and communicate.

 

Just tell him you are concerned about this myspace thing and would like to see, right now, what he may or may not be doing. If he cannot show you this (in that moment) then that gives you cause to be suspect.

 

If he gets defensive, says you are over sensitive, or just crazy for asking. Well, then take that as the flag that it is, he probably is hiding something. Whether, that means he is actually cheating, or on the pathway there of, you will have your answers and I would suggest getting out before marrying him.

 

You could spy on him, but that is just a bad road. Also, if he is leading some double life, or learning to....He could just as easily have several accounts in several places and well, in a relationship that is just unneccessary drama, and a recipe for disaster.

 

I hope he rises to the challenge and shows you. Even if there is something on there unsavory, he should be honest with you and respectful.

 

I hope it goes well.

 

Regards,

Unders

[Suede O'Nim]

Tell him what you saw and ask him to log into his myspace mail with you at his side so he can put your mind at ease. If he says you don't trust him tell him that you feel bad about it, but you just want to deal with it now and not dwell on it. If he throws a fit then you know he's hiding something. Assume the worst. He's flirting online and maybe keeping his options open. In your head, if he's doing the worst thing you can imagine, do you want to keep him? If not, then when he throws a fit, say it's over and leave. If you want to keep him then you insist that he show you and don't take no for an answer. Everything in the world stops for this one issue. No work. No dinner. No sleep. Make sure you have his keys before the conversation. Everything becomes this one issue. Rip the band-aid off. Get it dealt with immediately. If you can get past it, get past it now, not later. If you can't, then you're on the road to grieving which is the step immediately prior to healing. He has to know that if he tries to do something and you have the slightest inkling, then you will immediately deal with it. Either he will be open or he'll be afraid to do what he's not supposed to or he'll do it anyway and you'll go through this again in the future. Just don't put it off.

[RubyDeluxe]

Just put a keylogger on his machine . That's what I did. I make sure my man isn't lying to me

[insanelyjelous]

Hi

 

I understand what your going through my fiance has a myspace account as well as hi5, friends reunited and now facebook, I don't understand why he feels the need to put himself out there to every tom dick and harry or in his case sharon tracy and sam (lol), I have downloaded installed perfect keylogger on our computer, you have to pay 9.99 I think to get the version that is invisible, but it's definately worth it.

It captures every password and website he visits as well as taking screenshots, believe me I have learned a lot about him in the last 5 months more than I knew in the whole 10+ years I've known him although he hasn't cheated as far as I know.

I know people will say why am I with him if I don't trust him but I say I will never trust any person 100%. I watched my dad cheat on my mum countless times as I was growing up and I vowed that no man would ever do that to me and get away with it.

So do what you have to do!

[a4a]

If the two of you are living together and have plans to marry why not ask him for it? Or better yet ask him to remove the account period. Myspace is such a problem in relationships in my opinion. What does he need it for? To keep in contact with friends? He can use the phone for that..

 

Tell him to ditch the myspace account. It is so not necessary.

 

Agree.

 

If you are planning to marry this person neither of you should have a thing to hide from the other.

 

You both should be wide open books.

[Trialbyfire]

Why marry someone you don't trust? All he has to do is delete all the messages before giving you access. Nothing is proven.

[Lizzie60]

I want to marry someone who is respectful to me and respectful of my wishes.

What should I do? I can't talk to him about it... deny, deny.

 

Why bother? You're wasting your time and your energy... just dump him...simple.

 

If he's cheating before the marriage, how can you expect him 'not to' after the marriage...you're fooling yourself.

 

You already know he's sneaking around...he's lying about it... he's not respectful...

 

What else do you need to know? This guy is not trustful...

 

RUN, it's still time!

 

Wow... I'm shaking my head .. how can you even think about making a fake account... If you catch him... then what? Geeezzz.... you already know what you need to know.

[RubyDeluxe]

Hi

 

I understand what your going through my fiance has a myspace account as well as hi5, friends reunited and now facebook, I don't understand why he feels the need to put himself out there to every tom dick and harry or in his case sharon tracy and sam (lol), I have downloaded installed perfect keylogger on our computer, you have to pay 9.99 I think to get the version that is invisible, but it's definately worth it.

It captures every password and website he visits as well as taking screenshots, believe me I have learned a lot about him in the last 5 months more than I knew in the whole 10+ years I've known him although he hasn't cheated as far as I know.

I know people will say why am I with him if I don't trust him but I say I will never trust any person 100%. I watched my dad cheat on my mum countless times as I was growing up and I vowed that no man would ever do that to me and get away with it.

So do what you have to do!

 

ditto :)

[LoveLace]

Why marry someone you don't trust? All he has to do is delete all the messages before giving you access. Nothing is proven.

 

 

All the more reason why ya might as well just be honest about what you saw, and confront him about it. You have every right to do this if you are going marry him.