un romantic wife again

[sanjay5410]

Been married for nine years now. We have sex about two times a week, still? But I feel she is just performing duty sex and is not involved in sex,she just wants to finish it off as soon as possible.

She does not like romantic ideas i mean no kissing or hugging cuddling. She finds this very kiddish and when i tell her to improve she says get mature.

She doesn't like oral sex neither on me neither on her wont let me kiss her with wet lips no licking so we have sex the normal missionary positoin thats it?

she says she is there for me and she doesn't have to show this?

 

I have bought her tons of lingerie but she doesnt wear them cause she says she is not comfortable in them. She just wears those old fashion full lenght gowns.

 

For her romance is out of the window? And because of this Ii get angry over small matters and we fight like cats and dogs with volume on the highest level,we bring old problems in-laws problem and all other stuff?

 

So i would request all especially ladies to help me out as how to understand my wife better and improve intimacy and sex life?

 

I love her and dont want to lose her? I even asked her if she was having an affair which she said she wasn't and this didn't go down well with her so help me out

 

Well this has started may be for about three years now,basically my wife doesn't show any affection or intimacy she says she doesn't have to show it cause she is always there for me,on the other hand i would like her to show me some feelings,

I tell her if she can vent her anger displeasure and other things why cant she show her love to me?

 

One thing I know that we have been fighting and the only issue we start fighting is sex and the rest follows?

I have given this a lot of thinking, my urge for sex is topmost if allowed would like to have sex daily. One more thing that i have analyzed is that because of lack of quality sex my urge for sex has increased more

 

We sleep together, and its always me who hugs her and try to initiate sex. She doesnt reciprocate so I do this on daily basis, Just with the thought that i would get lucky one day.

 

May be i am doing too much or trying hard?

 

She has been saying she will change but till now she hasn't and this hurts me? I feel as how much should I change. I gave up smoking for her started a lot of other things as per her pleasure and in return all I asked was some physical intimacy

But she insisits that mental intimacy is more important cause than physical intimacy will follow but i feel physical intimacy is important and than mental intimacy will follow?

 

so what should be the solution?