noxnoctisangela Posted July 4, 2007 Share Posted July 4, 2007 I am still in love with a guy who is 800 miles away and has a gf.... the thing is he says he has feelings for me to but is rather confused right now. I know i should prob give up on him and move on but i cant. Every time i think about not having him around or being able to talk to him there is a huge hole in my heart. I have been trying to just be friends with him but its so hard and we get into fights b/c my bitterness comes out. I know i should prob not call him or talk to him again but i hate losing him from my life... i know i don't need him i can take care of myself but i want him to be there...is there anyway i can heal my heart and still have him as a friend? Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 I'm sorry you are hurting...did he just move far away, or has it always been this way? Has he always had this girlfriend? How exactly can you be used to having him around if he lives 800 miles away?..I guess you two just communiate often? It's probably best to at least minimize contact..you might think you cant live without him, but of course you can. Plus, less contact would probably make him like he has more space to think. But 800 miles...if you two did start a relationship, do you really think it would work? Link to post Share on other sites
This_Too_Shall_Pass Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 I am still in love with a guy who is 800 miles away and has a gf.... I can understand the first part, but not the second. That's a no-no, right there. I have been trying to just be friends with him but its so hard and we get into fights b/c my bitterness comes out. I know i should prob not call him or talk to him again but i hate losing him from my life... i know i don't need him i can take care of myself but i want him to be there...is there anyway i can heal my heart and still have him as a friend? No, N-angela, this question is for YOU to answer. Can you still be friends with him? Can you not be bitter when you talk to him? If both of you can remain unaffected, or at least successfully suppress your bitterness, then talk to him. But you know that's not going to happen. So just leave it. I don't want to sound cliched, but some people just go away from your life. You can't bring them back. Link to post Share on other sites
JulieJ Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 I But you know that's not going to happen. So just leave it. I don't want to sound cliched, but some people just go away from your life. You can't bring them back. I agree with this. Sometimes it is just best to let someone go. It doesn't mean that you can't find your way back to each other once you have both moved on, but sometimes you need to give yourself that distance in order to do so. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted July 6, 2007 Share Posted July 6, 2007 N-angela, I think you should let this guy go out of your life. He has a gf for a start, and he lives 800miles away. What sort of R will you have? I think as long as you are in love with him, it will be impossible to be "friends" and I don't think his GF will be particularly happy about it. For you to be "friends" you will need to get rid of the bitterness and resentment you harbour towards him for not wanting to be with you, and that is going to be very difficult. It would be easier to just let it go, and let the bitterness dissipate naturally as a result of having no contact with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noxnoctisangela Posted July 8, 2007 Author Share Posted July 8, 2007 now i am just really angry... i want to throw it back in his face that he made a mistake but i know thats not possible... i'm trying not to talk to him anymore and its really hard no matter how much i have convinced myself he is an idiot. I just dont understand how you can go from wanting to live together one day and then going back to your ex another...his excuses was that he didnt want to do a long distance relationship b/c in the past girls have cheated on him and because we havent know each other for very long to do that type of relationship...though ironically enough his "gf" keeps dumping him when she thinks she has a chance with another guy and when it doesnt work out all of a sudden she is going back to him saying "i missed you i made a mistake" If you really love someone why would you keep dumping them? Link to post Share on other sites
I love hot men. Posted July 8, 2007 Share Posted July 8, 2007 You have to ask yourself the same thing, if he really loved you, why would he let you go for his ex so easily and treat you so badly? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noxnoctisangela Posted July 8, 2007 Author Share Posted July 8, 2007 b/c he is a stupid 22 year old boy that doesnt know what its like to be in a real relationship... Link to post Share on other sites
This_Too_Shall_Pass Posted July 8, 2007 Share Posted July 8, 2007 b/c he is a stupid 22 year old boy that doesnt know what its like to be in a real relationship... You have your answer, there. I understand you're upset, but you know what he's incapable of. Move on, you'll find someone better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noxnoctisangela Posted July 9, 2007 Author Share Posted July 9, 2007 GOD...i know i shouldnt talk to him but damn it he starts talking to me first!!!! Its like we are both obsessed with each other in some sick form...its like we are not happy unless we are making each other miserable...both accusing each other of starting drama, playing games, lying.... why cant we stop? Link to post Share on other sites
This_Too_Shall_Pass Posted July 9, 2007 Share Posted July 9, 2007 GOD...i know i shouldnt talk to him but damn it he starts talking to me first!!!! Its like we are both obsessed with each other in some sick form...its like we are not happy unless we are making each other miserable...both accusing each other of starting drama, playing games, lying.... why cant we stop? Because it's become a habit. If it's making you both miserable, there's really no point. But then, sometimes the drama needs to be played out. After some time, your fighting fervor will die down, and things will be more peaceful. Link to post Share on other sites
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