J-Lo Butt

[JamesM]

These are the exceptions, not the rule. The average woman cannot fight off a man. And it's pretty hard to rape a man if he's not aroused, whether she's his boss or not.

 

There are so many situations in life that do not involve sex and rape where a woman is perceived as or truly is more "powerful" tan a man. Obviously, any situation where a woman has authority over a man is one. But even many workplaces contains situations where a woman is perceived more knowledgable or powerful than a man.

 

As an example, in the retail gardening shop, a woman is most always looked at as the most knowledgeable and hence most authoritative. I am continually "discriminated against" in this way. And it is very noticeable to my fellow workers...who are women. Funny thing is...and they will tell you...I have the most experience and knowledge. And that is not to say that they are dumb...far from it.

 

This is just one of many. However, you are right. I know of a lady who owns a business, and she relates to me that the male employee with her is more often assumed to be the owner than she is.

 

The "funny" thing is that in today's workplace, men are more afraid of offending women than women are afraid of offending men (bosses excluded).

[JamesM]

Also, any male practitioner of tae kwon do at a comparable level could likely whoop her ass. Sorry, but that's just how it goes.

 

That is questionable. She was about 150# and standing at 5'10". She has red hair and cold blue eyes. But the thing that makes her powerful is her confidence. I could see that she was not afraid. I would agree that she is the exception, but knowing that she has won many competitions...very few men would be willing to take a shot at her. So, yes, some men could overtake her, but far from any man of a comparable level could.

 

Back to topic..the point being here is that women are not as powerless in the workplace as they think. Even StayClose was afraid of saying the wrong thing, because he recognized the power that she had.

[doiask42much]

It's not power so much as protection, but this legal protection came about because a few bad apples spoiled the bunch. I get that you and he are both decent guys, but you have to realize lots of guys are not, and that in the workplace they have to err on the side of caution, even if it is tedious. You were just questioning why and I told you why. Not that I think it's right; it just is what it is.

 

Outside the workplace though, anything goes, I think. If you don't mind being slapped in the face. Heh. Kidding.

 

Many situations don't involve sex or rape, you're right, but the topic here was about complimenting the attractiveness of her butt, which is very much sexual in nature and not related to owning a business or knowledge of horticulture or tae kwon do.

[doiask42much]

Also, because women are given protection, that in and of itself suggests they don't inherently have power. If they did, there'd be no need for legal protection.

[I love hot men.]

Two things...

 

1) Like everyone else (including women), I have ideas about the most aesthetically pleasing shapes of body parts on the opposite sex.

 

2) Among the Many Things That Fascinated Me are how cultures tells us what our bodies as supposed to look like desspite the fact that people come in all shapes & sizes, and how many women's standards of what makes them attractive differs from what many men find attractive in women.

 

Writing this thread and reading the responses has involved about 10 times more thought about this woman's butt that I ever gave it before. It is not my life's passion. Until she made that comment yesterday, it was only the occasional "My, she looks good in those pants." as she walked away.

 

You are a funny guy! This thread is making me chuckle. Thanks for the laugh, you should have no problem finding a woman. Women love guys with senses of humor.

[The Velvet Vixen]

Because on a five foot two frame it looks disproportionate? A lot of people also refer to this as "ghetto booty," and some people just don't want a "ghetto" look, especially if they are going to wear couture or designer stuff....I do not consider that woman attractive in appearance or demeanor....

It just doesn't hang right if you have a lot of junk in your trunk.

I think your post would have been less...controversial if you'd simply said the look doesn't appeal to you. I'd imagine that some people would take offense when you write that a woman with a round, larger butt has a "ghetto" look, isn't attractive, has excess fat (do you really think that Jennifer Lopez or say, Gabrielle Union have excess fat? That don't work out regularly? Really?), and don't look good in designer clothing (if that's true, that's clearly a problem with the clothing not being designed to fit a diverse set of natural body types; it clearly doesn't mean the women are "wrong" for being born that way...right?). What you've written basically translates to say that the majority of black women and a very high percentage of hispanic women (these types of butts are relatively rare in other types of women, although the buttocks of any skater or ballet dancer comes very close to the same look) are ghetto, have excess fat, and can't be attractive due to their naturally round, larger buttocks. These types of butts are caused by genetics and are the norm in these types of women--and no amount of yoga, exercise or weight loss will take it away.

 

I personally think that a larger (though not massive), round butt is most attractive, although the woman should exercise and keep it in proper shape so that it doesn't sag and get stretch marks. A round, larger butt, IMO, lends a more curvy appearance most often associated with womanhood, especially since rounder butts are usually accompanied by more shapely hips. I don't like the appearance of the flat ones, less if they are what is called "heart-shaped," least if have that wide, flat look (the wide, flat ones are, btw, the ones that are actually caused by excess weight, old age, or a combination of the two factors).

[Trialbyfire]

I really don't feel it's appropriate to comment on your coworker's anatomy unless you two are really close. I'd say leave it alone. She thinks a certain way about her butt and one comment from a coworker isn't going to change that, sadly.

I agree. I would never say that I like the extra large bump in the front of a man's pants.

 

"I think that proportionally, the substantial bump in your pants is far more attractive than the average man's bump. Oh, and btw, you really should be proud of the curve of your posterior. It does draw the eye."

[McFadden]

I am so sick of this big butt craze. It seems like a lot of men suddenly like it because its trendy now. Proportional is always the best. A butt is only good if its firm and well toned. In that case I don't think the size matters as much.

[directx]

I didnt know there was a big butt craze. About time

[StayClose]

Rightly or wrongly, I think women strive to emulate celebrities and assume these women are ideal because they essentially make their living from their looks and have millions of adoring fans of both genders. And a lot of men have no idea what looks good (look at the way a lot of them can't dress themselves!), so I don't really trust a man to tell me what looks good unless he is exceedingly handsome and well groomed. I know what I want my body to look like. It sounds like your coworker does too. Your point of view one way or the other is not going to have any impact, unless you're someone she actually likes "that way," which I would hope is not the case.

 

Ironically, during the same conversation she complimented both me and the other man who was with us at the time on dressing in a manner that made us look good. I realize that my point of view probably will not have impact, but I hate to see women judge themselves negatively, especially when I think they are hot!

 

Again, rightly or wrongly, it's assumed that a classy guy wants a classy-looking girl, and the "ghetto booty" has traditionally not been seen as classy. Maybe that will change in time. I think what it mostly boils down to is she wants to be porportionate for her height and health/fitness level and is somewhat self-conscious that she isn't, or doesn't feel she is, which, from your earlier comments, appears to be the case. Not that it's not attractive to many men, just it's not what she wants.

 

Sometimes, *gasp* it's really not about you men, you know.

 

Let me be clear: her but is NOT big by any standard, excpect perhaps for a 5-yer-old girl. It's just that her hips & but are rounded while the rest of her is very petite.

[StayClose]

Another thing: her ass might look ok now, but bear in mind that they tend to grow over time. She may feel she is at "critical mass" but be concerned that ten years from now, she will be downright unhappy with it and be unable to do anything about it by then.

 

I'll tell 'ya, she is close to 40 but she could easily pass for less than 30. Most women her age would kill for her figure, butt & all.

[I love hot men.]

I'll tell 'ya, she is close to 40 but she could easily pass for less than 30. Most women her age would kill for her figure, butt & all.

 

LOLOL. You are a funny guy! I bet your coworkers have a blast with you.

 

Anyway...J-Lo butts are always in. When I was in college in the late 80s, the guys were talking about apple bottoms.

[The Velvet Vixen]

Sometimes women (not referring to anyone in particular) want the notion of beauty to be limited to only women who possess the features they possess, and for men who they would include in their dating pool to only be attracted to women like them. A truly confident, secure woman probably would not feel annoyed or threatened by the idea of women with features she doesn't possess also being considered beautiful. I think the common notion of beauty should be expanded to include a wider variety of women. This doesn't mean that features you possess must necessarily be replaced; various notions of beauty can exist alongside each other. Also not everyone is attracted to everything. As long as you find a person who is attracted to you, that's all that's important. I personally don't think there's a need to fight so hard against this.

 

It seems like a lot of men suddenly like it because its trendy now. Proportional is always the best.

Proportional is really just relative. For some women that is their real proportion. It's just like when some women are much bigger on top than others. What is considered out of proportion? When they're so large that they cause the woman to fall over backwards (forward if she's large on top)?

[McFadden]

Proportional is really just relative. For some women that is their real proportion. It's just like when some women are much bigger on top than others. What is considered out of proportion? When they're so large that they cause the woman to fall over backwards (forward if she's large on top)?

 

I guess what I really meant was "women proportioned like me are always the best." I'm doing that egocentric thing people tend to do..hahah. I was just thinking of what the anatomical model of the average 'perfect' form is or something along those lines. Whenever one feature is much larger than average it doesn't look as good to my eye.

[The Velvet Vixen]

I was just thinking of what the anatomical model of the average 'perfect' form is or something along those lines.

The problem is that those anatomical models that claim to be the perfect form were created centuries ago by a small group of people who wanted to impose their idea of beauty onto everyone else. It's perfectly fine for people to have their personal preferences, but it's a problem when it's imposed as the universal standard, especially when it's biased in that it's a standard that some woman just could never hope to achieve due to genetic traits (if a certain appearance was due to a lifestyle choice, i.e., overeating or eating unhealthy foods, that would be different). If it's a genetic trait that a woman can't get rid of, and if she's not a woman who is strong, secure and independent-thinking and who would therefore decide for herself what's attractive or not, this can create all sorts of complexes. Most women have complexes about their appearance, and that rigid universal standard of beauty is the cause. That's why I disagree with it. Personal opinions...normal and fine. Universalizing one's preferences or associating the preferences with "superior" people...not fine, IMO.

[McFadden]

Its not the fault of society that there are always going to be standard that the majority finds the attractive and most people don't live up to it. I can accept that I have many of the non-preferred traits. If women have complexes about thier appearance because of this they are just being too sensitive IMO.

[The Velvet Vixen]

Its not the fault of society that there are always going to be standard that the majority finds the attractive and most people don't live up to it.

I think there's a huge difference between the standard(s) that would naturally be found beautiful by most, and the standard that is found beautiful by most due to the imposition on most of the world of the preferences of a few.

 

I can accept that I have many of the non-preferred traits.

I think it's great for a person to be able to accept themselves, because doing so is fundamental to emotional health and happiness. However, I have to say that I did get a different impression from one of your prior posts. I got the idea that you were bothered and sickened by the fact that lots of men are attracted to a feature that you don't possess:

McFadden I am so sick of this big butt craze. It seems like a lot of men suddenly like it because its trendy now. Proportional is always the best.

I'm not trying to call you out, so I hope you won't take it that way, but it would be unusual for a woman who is secure with herself to react so strongly when confronted by the fact that a lot of men find a feature(s) she doesn't possess very attractive.

[Trialbyfire]

I think there's a huge difference between the standard(s) that would naturally be found beautiful by most, and the standard that is found beautiful by most due to the imposition on most of the world of the preferences of a few.

 

Exactly.

 

Btw, the world standards for women are currently being set by gay men. Go figure.

[doiask42much]

I think your post would have been less...controversial if you'd simply said the look doesn't appeal to you. I'd imagine that some people would take offense when you write that a woman with a round, larger butt has a "ghetto" look, isn't attractive, has excess fat (do you really think that Jennifer Lopez or say, Gabrielle Union have excess fat? That don't work out regularly? Really?), and don't look good in designer clothing (if that's true, that's clearly a problem with the clothing not being designed to fit a diverse set of natural body types; it clearly doesn't mean the women are "wrong" for being born that way...right?). What you've written basically translates to say that the majority of black women and a very high percentage of hispanic women (these types of butts are relatively rare in other types of women, although the buttocks of any skater or ballet dancer comes very close to the same look) are ghetto, have excess fat, and can't be attractive due to their naturally round, larger buttocks. These types of butts are caused by genetics and are the norm in these types of women--and no amount of yoga, exercise or weight loss will take it away.

 

I personally think that a larger (though not massive), round butt is most attractive, although the woman should exercise and keep it in proper shape so that it doesn't sag and get stretch marks. A round, larger butt, IMO, lends a more curvy appearance most often associated with womanhood, especially since rounder butts are usually accompanied by more shapely hips. I don't like the appearance of the flat ones, less if they are what is called "heart-shaped," least if have that wide, flat look (the wide, flat ones are, btw, the ones that are actually caused by excess weight, old age, or a combination of the two factors).

 

I think that a lot of clothing designers don't design clothes democratically precisely because they want to seem elite. What I think or don't think about her butt size has nothing to do with it. What I mostly wanted to say was that I got the impression that the woman whom he spoke of had a look for herself in mind that had nothing to do with his opinion nor the opinions of the average male. He seemed to think his opinion of her butt was more correct than her opinion of her own butt and I really think it has nothing to do with him, given that he's not her bf and actually a married man.

[doiask42much]

I think there's a huge difference between the standard(s) that would naturally be found beautiful by most, and the standard that is found beautiful by most due to the imposition on most of the world of the preferences of a few.

 

And just to be "controversial" again, for the sake of sh*ts and giggles, that what is most desirable is often that which is rare. They have to withhold the worldwide supply of diamonds in banks via cartels to make it seem more valuable. If everyone accepted the most common body type as the most beautiful, could it really be so? Being that it was almost common? Not trying to piss anyone off here; just trying to open up a discussion. Bear in mind this is kind of veering off the topic of the OP. I was trying to address THAT WOMAN'S psyche, not yours, VV. Methinks you are making this about you. Again, not trying to be rude, just sayin'.

[McFadden]

I am not literally sickened and disgusted by big butts. I think they are over promoted, I'm 'sick of' seeing them as in tired of it..

[doiask42much]

I am not literally sickened and disgusted by big butts. I think they are over promoted, I'm 'sick of' seeing them as in tired of it..

 

I do think that in a country where obesity is almost epidemic, they are giving licence for some to run with it and feel that "curves are sexy" when really they look nothing like JLo and should really be more mindful their lifestyles. Not to say everyone with a JLo butt has a problem, but you should bear in mind that her trainers have her in the gym most days of the week, whereas most normal people are not this way. (She fights her own genetic predisposition every step of the way to remain a sex symbol and has even said so in the press.) Proportion is a good rule of thumb regarding % body fat. If you're confident about your body fat percentage, a quick trip to the gym is all it takes. They zap you with one of those machines and you can till in 10 seconds whether you're JLo or actually in need of some lifestyle changes. No need to debate about it on here. It's not just some artificially/racially imposed superficial fashion magazine thing; people today are far more sedentary and fatter than 100 years ago. It's a fact. It's also true that people have more eating disorders than before, but objective measures can quickly give you a ballpark of which camp you're in.

[McFadden]

I'm honestly not trying to come across as saying I dislike seing overweight people... I think I phrased something offensively but I was never talking about obese people. I meant how it seems like very larger than average butts are promoted as being the only sexy and attractive kind and it seems like its a trend or something. Maybe its the stations I happen to catch when I turn on the TV. I know the body type I think looks good, and as long as its athletic and toned any size butt is alright but not if its jiggly. I am not even that into butts either way, I don't want to see gigantic, jiggling butts shaking wearing thongs all day. By the way mine isn't even that good anyway. It is pretty nondescript and could probably be in better tone before I start talking about other peoples'.

[The Velvet Vixen]

And just to be "controversial" again, for the sake of sh*ts and giggles, that what is most desirable is often that which is rare....If everyone accepted the most common body type as the most beautiful, could it really be so? Being that it was almost common?

Flat buttocks are hardly rare, lol. These are the vast majority of buttocks most people see on a daily basis. In any case, I didn't say that most people should accept the most common body type as being the most beautiful. I said people should be able to decide what they feel is beautiful without the impositions of a small group of people who set their standard as the norm and superior preference. I also said that a variety of beauty types may co-exist without any being a threat to the other.

 

I was trying to address THAT WOMAN'S psyche, not yours, VV. Methinks you are making this about you. Again, not trying to be rude, just sayin'.

I wasn't referring to the parts where you addressed the woman's psyche; I was referring to the parts of your posts where you described women of a certain body type as "ghetto," "unattractive" and not people who practiced a healthy lifestyle, which I thought was inaccurate and therefore important to address.

[doiask42much]

I agree. I would never say that I like the extra large bump in the front of a man's pants.

 

"I think that proportionally, the substantial bump in your pants is far more attractive than the average man's bump. Oh, and btw, you really should be proud of the curve of your posterior. It does draw the eye."

 

TBF dynamite, as always!