Debate - Is it the thought of marriage that is making me think this

[icemaiden]

Hi everyone I hope you can help. I am getting married in a couple of months. I love my boyfriend more then I have loved anyone in my life, I have been 100% faithful and to be honest dont even look at other men. HOWEVER - as the date is getting nearerI have noticed that I am noticing other men more - the more attractive ones and I was wandering is this just pre-wedding stuff as its getting nearer and nearer??

 

There is one guy in particular who I sometimes see. I went out with some girl friends on the weekend and he was there and all he does is smile at me but he knows Im with my boyfriend and I would certainly never do anything to hurt my boyfriend and I would certainly never heat. But wat does all this mean??

 

Advice would be great

 

Thanks

[icemaiden]

Oh, no replies!! Can anyone advise me on this? Has it happened to them and why? Thanks

[norajane]

I think it means you're human.

 

You will notice other men and may even be attracted to some of them them throughout your lifetime - that part of us does not just disappear because we have made a commitment to someone. There is not just one person in the whooooole world that we can become attracted to and do quite well with in a marriage. But there is only one person that you do make that commitment to.

However, noticing other people doesn't mean you no longer love your man, nor does it mean that you have to take it seriously and you certainly do not need to do anything about it. So be flattered if someone smiles at you admiringly and enjoy the compliment, but remember that your fiancee is the one you love more than anybody.

[Hestia]

It shouldnt be a problem as long as you are sure that you wont cheat your future husband with one of these guys. It's okay to look and to be tempted as long as you dont do anything. If you are truly sure that this is the man you want to love until the end of your life then you shouldnt worry too much.

[Cobra_X30]

Yuppers. If you start flirting with other guys then you have an issue.

 

Your fiance is probably going through the exact same thing right now.

[icemaiden]

I can sssure you I would never ever cheat on fiance, never have and never will. Weve been togetehr for 4 years and ive never had any interest in other men since being with him, I know I will be 100% unfaithful. Im not tempted to cheat with anyone else it just came as a surprise that all of a sudden all these men are sticking out like sore thumbs. I was wandering if its pre-wedding nerves or something thats made me notice them more? does this happen to everyone for example?

[quankanne]

it's kind of like when you want a particular kind of car and you've researched it and you're >this< close to buying it, when all of a sudden you notice there are other attractive vehicles on the streets even when you know that Car Y is the only one that'll do for you. You just become more aware that other nice vehicles exist, period. It's mere human nature to observe these kinds of things ...

[icemaiden]

ok thanks thats reassuring.... and i meant 100% faithful not 100% unfaithful. LOL

[quankanne]

and i meant 100% faithful not 100% unfaithful

 

:laugh: didn't even catch that! Does it mean that deep down, we're *truly* floozies? LOL ...

 

my thought is that it's okay to observe, because that's human nature, but when you're in a committed relationship, you just don't cross the line because your loyalty is to the relationship.