risk vs. happiness?

[eze]

My boyfriend and I have been officially together for almost a year. During the school year, he goes to college 2 hours away from where I go, and during the summer (now) I live 2.5 hours away from him. I know this isn't the longest distance, but we are both used to the kind of relationship where you can just drop by any time, and this is what we both truly want in each other.

 

What I'm trying to decide is if I want to transfer to his school after this year. I would lose a few thousand dollars a year in scholarships, and my parents would be quite unhappy with me... however I am pretty sure they would get over it, as my sister transferred after her first year of college to be with her now-husband.

 

However, I am so scared. I don't know many people where he is from, and I am afraid that if for some reason we didn't work out I'd be stuck in a place I didn't feel comfortable on my own. But, I need to be with him more, and to have the kind of relationship that I want; I am so tired of the weekend visitations. I am a logical person, so I worry about the chance that we actually wouldn't work in this situation... do we only really work as a phone-couple?

 

Where is the line between too much risk and the best decision of my life?

[DOA]

While I understand the desire to transfer to be with your boyfriend for the sake of your relationship, I think 2.5 hours away is doable WITHOUT having to move. I really don't think that you should uproot your college life where you are right now (and under a good scholarship too, it seems!) to move somewhere not TOO far away just to see your bf everyday (although it would be nice!)

 

How is your relationship going now? Really strong and stable? How often do you get to see each other? Also, how long will the relationship have to be distanced before you both have a proper opportunity to close the gap?

 

Despite your sister taking the risk and being a success story, for every success, there are way more that fail in LDRs, and I think it is dangerous to start revolving your life around a person. If you move and don't adjust to the city or make friends easily, it will adversely affect the relationship, and IF the relationship falls apart, you'll find yourself all alone and messed up.

 

I really believe if your relationship is going well now and you communicate well everyday, that you need not move to be with him. Don't forget that college life is a unique time unlike any other, a good period to find yourself and carve out goals for your future. Sure your bf won't be side by side with you in your experiences, but you can both grow together in separate situations and if the relationship lasts throughout the college years, then you've won both ways!