Feelgood Posted July 25, 2007 Share Posted July 25, 2007 I have been reading alot about no contact and how in some circumstances it can lead to reconciliation. I was just wondering what happens if both parties are using no contact as a way of making the ex miss them and both are waiting for the other to make contact? Who should initiate the contact when the break up was a fairly mutral decision? I have been split up from my boyfriend for 5 weeks now and have had made no contact myself in 2 weeks. Quite soon after the breakup we were sleeping together (initiated by me each time) and I told him I wanted him back, he told me he wanted to be friends and nothing more. As it was me that officially ended it I think alot of this has to do with pride and it was probably too soon. Since then Iv gone into complete no contact and have been keeping busy but its still on my mind 24/7. I have received the odd text from him asking how i am etc and have replied in a friendly manner but have told him nothing about myself and have asked no questions. Now i dont know whether I should contact him? I don't want to come across as needy but at the same time we didnt end on bad terms and im afraid that if i make no contact then this will be it for good. He probably won't make any contact now as he probably feels like its 'my turn'.... Link to post Share on other sites
Kelso Posted July 25, 2007 Share Posted July 25, 2007 I know how much it sucks not to receive an answer here So I'll give you a part of my story. First of all we broke up in October - things just weren't working so we called it quits. I felt so good afterwards - but soon it changed and I thought that it might be the biggest mistakes of my life. Soon I found LS where I read a lot about NC and how it can help you to get your lover back. So I started a NC which only lasted for about 2 weeks. Not very well done by me The next NC was supposed to last for at least 2 months or until after the new years. I did that - and after two months I found it ridiculous to contact so long after the breakup so I decided that this NC was simply just for me to heal. So I didn't contact her until earlier this month (we happened to meet for a coincidence and things have been developing since...more frequent MSN talks and texting and stuff) - and we're doing fine now and it might be a chance for us again. Only time will tell. In your case you have to give it a longer time. There are only 2 weeks since you last contacted him and you laid all your cards on the table and he told you he only wants to be friends. So the ball is completely in his court now. It's hard to hear - I know. Just stay strong and don't contact for few weeks. Since me and my ex started speaking again - I always act kind of cold and not to eager to get back together. Good things take time to happen so I'm just gonna wait and see if anything happens. Sometimes It's killing me ... but time is your only friend here I think. Hang in there and try to concentrate on other things to and don't let him become an obsession. Take care of yourself... Kelso Link to post Share on other sites
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