PONDERING: difference b/w sexes, porn, cheating…

[morelaugh]

Some of the latest posts on this forum prompted me to think about this.

 

Everyone talks about the difference about men and women.

How we should accept it simply because it is natural, which usually comes back to ‘men need sex, women need security’ type of stereotypes.

 

Maybe women want sex and variety and kinkiness as much as men, but are simply (biologically/physiologically/sociologically/…?) not capable of achieving that by using porn, SC or similar outlets, traditionally ‘accepted’ by the male dominated world.

 

What I mean is: men could accept their g/f or wife to go to the SC or watch porn - just because that is something they can understand and not take too seriously. On the other hand, if a woman is not interested in that sort of things (and most women are not) she doesn’t have a ‘safe’ outlet which would be somehow equivalent to that.

 

Actual cheating is a big no-no for both sexes, but (in general) women are simply not so turned on by naked men parading in front of them. They may be turned on more by a stranger talking sweet BS to them on the phone (not much different from porn, but still a difference unacceptable to most people today). Or maybe, in this particular situation, women just don’t want to accept BS of fake porn or other attempts to fulfil their ‘desire for a variety’ and go for a real thing.

 

Looking from a bit different perspective, maybe cheating for women means even less than cheating for men, because this is their ONLY outlet.

 

Women don’t have virtually anything else to channel their sexual energy (and, of course, most would agree that being sexually attracted to many other people is normal and acceptable).

 

You can call BS on this, but if you think about it – so many women claim they love porn, s/c and all that, but after a couple of years in a R or M and couple of kids, they either

• Start complaining about it
  
• Loose interest in sex ( which for me means they were never that much into it in the first place), or
  
• Get into a messy affair with someone just to satisfy their sexual appetites and a ‘need for a variety’

There are, of course, happy and content people who don’t fall into any of these categories, but I’m not talking about them, and if you think about it – what would these people do on the forum like this?

 

I think we all agree that women NEED sex too.

(And men need security too, but that is not the point)

 

My point is:

(most) Men want their porn and s/c and alike.

(most) Men are happy to give the same to their SO.

But (most) women do not want (or more importantly, do not respond to) men defined forms of entertainment. They want something that can actually turn them on – and that is not available on the ‘entertainment market’ today.

 

What is left for women is to either

• become asexual, boring and extremely sweet human beings or
  
• try to do the same thing their man does and indulge in their own sexuality – for which they will deserve proverbial stoning, just because they can’t express their sexuality in EXACTLY the same way men do.

[Lizzie60]

Some of the latest posts on this forum prompted me to think about this.

 

Everyone talks about the difference about men and women.

How we should accept it simply because it is natural, which usually comes back to ‘men need sex, women need security’ type of stereotypes.

 

Maybe women want sex and variety and kinkiness as much as men, but are simply (biologically/physiologically/sociologically/…?) not capable of achieving that by using porn, SC or similar outlets, traditionally ‘accepted’ by the male dominated world.

 

What I mean is: men could accept their g/f or wife to go to the SC or watch porn - just because that is something they can understand and not take too seriously. On the other hand, if a woman is not interested in that sort of things (and most women are not) she doesn’t have a ‘safe’ outlet which would be somehow equivalent to that.

 

Actual cheating is a big no-no for both sexes, but (in general) women are simply not so turned on by naked men parading in front of them. They may be turned on more by a stranger talking sweet BS to them on the phone (not much different from porn, but still a difference unacceptable to most people today). Or maybe, in this particular situation, women just don’t want to accept BS of fake porn or other attempts to fulfil their ‘desire for a variety’ and go for a real thing.

 

Looking from a bit different perspective, maybe cheating for women means even less than cheating for men, because this is their ONLY outlet.

 

Women don’t have virtually anything else to channel their sexual energy (and, of course, most would agree that being sexually attracted to many other people is normal and acceptable).

 

You can call BS on this, but if you think about it – so many women claim they love porn, s/c and all that, but after a couple of years in a R or M and couple of kids, they either

• Start complaining about it
  
• Loose interest in sex ( which for me means they were never that much into it in the first place), or
  
• Get into a messy affair with someone just to satisfy their sexual appetites and a ‘need for a variety’

There are, of course, happy and content people who don’t fall into any of these categories, but I’m not talking about them, and if you think about it – what would these people do on the forum like this?

 

I think we all agree that women NEED sex too.

(And men need security too, but that is not the point)

 

My point is:

(most) Men want their porn and s/c and alike.

(most) Men are happy to give the same to their SO.

But (most) women do not want (or more importantly, do not respond to) men defined forms of entertainment. They want something that can actually turn them on – and that is not available on the ‘entertainment market’ today.

 

What is left for women is to either

• become asexual, boring and extremely sweet human beings or
  
• try to do the same thing their man does and indulge in their own sexuality – for which they will deserve proverbial stoning, just because they can’t express their sexuality in EXACTLY the same way men do.

 

I understand what you're saying and I agree to some of the points... I do believe that, in general, men are more sexual creatures than women... (except for me LOL)

 

I also agree that a guy can sleep aruond, no questions asked... but when a woman makes 20-30 mistakes, she's a tramp... LOL

 

Seriously... there is definitely a double standard when it comes to female sexuality...

 

It does come from our upbringing (strict catholic families).

 

Both men and women will become sexually bored with the same partner on a long term basis, I'm sure of that... not everyone act on it... some just accept that life... some don't... some leave the marriage, some cheat.

[Cobra_X30]

I also agree that a guy can sleep aruond, no questions asked... but when a woman makes 20-30 mistakes, she's a tramp... LOL

 

Seriously... there is definitely a double standard when it comes to female sexuality...

 

It does come from our upbringing (strict catholic families).

 

 

I think this has to do with how males view sex. A much greater percentage of men can sleep around without much emotional attachment. Plus there are fewer consequences to be faced. Lower chance for STD's, cant get pregnant... ect.

 

This may sound a little odd, but a good percentage of men feel that sex without love is violence. Its something that I rarely hear anyone talk about directly, but I believe it to be true.