Noos Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 Does anyone else think that some people just date other people long term without really being into them or that they marry people they aren't really into without really holding out for the real thing? I can't believe that so many people are meeting the one in their twenties or at the local university or that they just happen to meet through friends. Isn't that all too easy? I'm beginning to think that i'm in the wrong to expect butterflies and excitement and maybe just compatibility through life is all I'm meant to hope for. How do all these people keep finding others that they want to spend their lives with or myriad people that they want to date? Link to post Share on other sites
VIP Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 I think compatibility is very important, may be more so than butterflies and excitement. By the way, not everybody found their life partner in their twenties, and a lot of those who thought, that they did, are divorced now. Did you try online dating? Did you try to look for someone outside of your geografical location? May be you need to have a makeover and to lose some weight? Link to post Share on other sites
Replicant Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 I can't believe that so many people are meeting the one in their twenties or at the local university or that they just happen to meet through friends. Isn't that all too easy? You should go read in the break up forum, where all those Cinderella stories by the dozen come to a crashing halt. Everyone does stupid things in their early 20's, relationship views are but one of them. I've seen a few cases where people i know married high school sweethearts or someone dated in college/university but it's not all that common by the numbers those relationships ever stand the test of time. Link to post Share on other sites
Road Rage Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 High school sweetheats who marry seldom stand the test of time because there is a lot of time to test them:laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
allina Posted August 6, 2007 Share Posted August 6, 2007 Just because a couple gets together in their 20s doesn't mean they aren't with someone who gives them butterflies and is compatible with them. On the other hand I've looked at couples that have been together for years and just thought "WHY?!" Link to post Share on other sites
FleshNBones Posted August 6, 2007 Share Posted August 6, 2007 Does anyone else think that some people just date other people long term without really being into them or that they marry people they aren't really into without really holding out for the real thing? I can't believe that so many people are meeting the one in their twenties or at the local university or that they just happen to meet through friends. Isn't that all too easy? I'm beginning to think that i'm in the wrong to expect butterflies and excitement and maybe just compatibility through life is all I'm meant to hope for. How do all these people keep finding others that they want to spend their lives with or myriad people that they want to date?The real thing? Do you really know the difference? I can understand the whole "meet through friends" thing. In my case, women are only willing to talk with me if we meet through a mutual friend. The whole dating scene is as convoluted as any government buracracy. I cannot approach a woman directly, but instead, must go through the proper channels. I must have her friend's approval before I can get a shot. To get access to that friend, I must go through another friend and so on and so forth. If you want butterflies and excitement then you probably want infatuation rather than love. Infatuation, like any drug, will wear off with time. It may lead to lasting love or more commonly, bitter divorce. Link to post Share on other sites
Character Posted August 7, 2007 Share Posted August 7, 2007 I think we mostly date and marry people who are easy to get along with, and often go without the passion, romance, and desire that our culture idealizes. This is not to say that romance and passion and butterflies don't happen, but they're rare. Usually we end up only content. Dare to be the exception! But seriously, in my 12 years of dating, I have only truly been in love once, and the relationship was a rocky one that lasted barely a year. That was 12 years ago. Link to post Share on other sites
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