alexa137 Posted August 7, 2007 Share Posted August 7, 2007 i wanted to add to my earlier post about cant let go-- how do you get him to miss you, want you back and think about you i'm gonna try my best not answer if he calls but sometimes i have to tell him something like he left some things here i know it might be an excuse and it can probably wait! the days are so long and depressing without him in my life here with me--i mean we spent everyday (other than working) together and all wekend doing things--its so hard i know 1 1/2 years is not long to most but it is for me i'm just kinda thinking ways to get him to realize that he has it made with me other than me questioning him--i know guys hate that--but he did it too to me! it didnt bother me though--i had nothing to hide i think right now he just wants to chill and see what he wants to do but the waiting is excrutiating! he said hes not ready to come back yet--which i dont know what that means i just home he thinks it through and doesnt make any mistakes like being with some whore or something-we both dont want to see each other with someone else--duh! to solve that would be to get back together and work it out!!!men are really stupid! Link to post Share on other sites
AngryHeartache Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Hun, let me start by saying...I know how you are feeling. Oh don't you just hate that line?! Haha. But really I do..I've been there. Hell, it's only been a few months and I'm still there sometimes. But I'm learning a lot lately. I kow how desperate you are to get him to miss you. But the harsh reality is this...you CAN'T, OK? You cannot MAKE somebody miss you, love you, like you, hate you, etc. that's all down to them. The only thing that can make it more likely is to not be around. He said he's not ready to come back yet. That means just that, babe. I know why you're looking for the hidden meaning, I do it sometimes, everybody does when they don't like the answers! But he probably means that. He's made up his mind - at least for now. Now all you can do is try and move on. Yeah, **** aint it! But you have no choice. Calling him will not help, it will make it worse if anything, and less likely for him to miss you and want you back. Not any contact will help you here...it just keeps replaying the pain and you get stuck. The only thing that will help is to have no contact. You'll see it everywhere here, and I refused to listen to it at first. But it's damn well true, let me tell you! It still hurts being without my ex, but it hurts even more to have him ignore my calls,messages, hang up the phone, hear how he is doing from his friends. And so I don;t give him the chance to do that now. And if you talk to his friends, I suggest leaving that out too. You really don't wanna know how he is getting on. If they are your friends too...tell them you DO NOT, and WILL NOT, talk about him, and you'd appreciate it if they didn't either. Leave him and stop trying to make him miss you. Just try and have fun and get on with your life. That is the ONLY thing you have control over. You do not have control over this guys emotions or actions! If he does come back to you for another chance - good. But don't wait around for it. I'm in the same boat but getting better quickly by living by these rules This board helps a lot!! Good luck x Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 If you want him to miss you your best chances are to leave him alone. How can he miss you if you won't go away?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexa137 Posted August 8, 2007 Author Share Posted August 8, 2007 its hard but i did pretty good last night when he tried calling twice and i didnt answer-i think thats the first time ive done that in over a year! but this morning he called and by accident i picked up the receiver to see who it was and it answered by itself(gotta turn that feature off) but it was private caller(how stupid bcause i know where he lives now) why does he have to block number?? retarded--bu i just said i am going back to sleep and hung up--i think he asked me why didnt i answer phone last night? let him wonder.... but ive tried instead of being depressed and missing him and thinking of all the good times hoping he is to --i try to think of the bad and why i shouldnt want him like the hurt he caused by cheating and lying and i think he caused the miscarriage i am going through now(surgery today or tomm) and then i get really stressed out so i dont know whats worse depression or stress--but ive been going through both for months now i just dont want him to move on unless he thinks this through and if he realizes that he had a good life living with me-i made his lunch, did his laundry, cooked him dinner almost everynight, etc... i know thats probably not inportatnt but i bet he misses it and it tired of mcdonalds and spending all his money on lunch and dinner! but i guess me questioning him and the arguing and him not getting along with my daughter is why he left--but he has done this twice before i guess i am talking alot bcause i havent seen my therapist in two weeks and she doeesnt know all this yet i see her friday! Link to post Share on other sites
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