taxilass Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and had been completly faithful until recently. I have started an affair with a married man who has 2 young kids. I didnt go out to do this. It was teh married man that came after me but i didnt say no. Now i can't get this married man out my head i want him and my boyfriend. I hardly see my boyfriend as we live in differnt countries which i think is why this has happened. When it first happened i called the married man the next day and ended it but then it started again and he has ended it twice but we keep going back to each other. He both feel guilty that we are cheating on your partners but we can't help it. He has liked me for a while before he told me. I was just wonderign if anyone had any advice for me what how i can deal with the guilt i have. Please i need advice thanks Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 He (sic) both feel guilty that we are cheating on your partners but we can't help it. That's a cop-out. Yes, you CAN help it. You're just choosing not to. You're not mind-controlled or a robot with no free will or something. I was just wonderign if anyone had any advice for me what how i can deal with the guilt i have. Hopefully you aren't just asking for advice about how to deal with the guilt, so that you can go on cheating on your boyfriend, only guilt-free. Break up with your BF. Let him find somebody who won't cheat on him. He doesn't deserve to be sitting at home in another country pining for his wonderful GF who he thinks loves him and is faithful to him. You may want the MM and your BF, but you can't have both. Grow up and let the poor bastard go already. I don't think you should be with the OM either since he's married; personally I would have difficulty sleeping at night knowing I was cheerfully being an accessory to wrecking somebody else's marriage. But if you're okay with that, then rock on. Link to post Share on other sites
BohemeRose Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Hm. Well, I have a feeling that you're turning to this married man because he can give you something your LD lover can't...physical attention. And the fact that he's married makes him essentially emotionally unavailable, because at the end of the day he's going home to his wife, regardless of what he's doing with you. Does this make it right? No. Of course not. But rather than just blame, guilt, blame, guilt...thought a little insight might be constructive. Anyway. You need to decide whether physical attention is worth potentially destroying what you have with someone you're supposedly in love with. But that's assuming it's salvageable at this point anyway, if you decide to come clean with your boyfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
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