rumours83 Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 ok so we met up with his ex turned friend, i guess that is what you could call it.I was expecting to feel a bit jealous but i didn't, which is good as i didn't want another fight with my partner over the issue. the only things is she acted a little bit jealous, and when my partner got upset (he has had things rough lately) i held his hand, and she grabbed hold of the other, and still tried to hold it even when i was hugging him. i tried to explain to him that i thought this was a bit odd, he got upset as he thought i meant someothing sexual about it, but i was just wondering why she didn't say "oh go hug your girlfriend" or something? if he needs that kind of comfort and i am their it will be me that gives it to him! she also made some comment about how she thought it was ok to be friends with someone but not their partner whilst my partner was at the bar- to which i stated no. i think she is a little bit in denial. how could that friendship last anyway? if she is going to funny about me then like hell is she coming round my place or joining in with any activities involving our family and circle of friends. anyway my partner agrees that if that is what she wanted or would ask him if he wanted to do that, then he wouldn't be friends with her any more. i don't feel threatened by her, i found her a bit boring, and i can't really see us all hanging out in future, apart from she will be at our wedding but neither of us with really have to spend with her then, so hopefully it will just fade out? Link to post Share on other sites
squeak Posted August 11, 2007 Share Posted August 11, 2007 still tried to hold it even when i was hugging him That hand grabbing thing is fu *t but i was just wondering why she didn't say "oh go hug your girlfriend" or something? um, because she doesn't give a sh*t about you , and will do what it takes to get him she also made some comment about how she thought it was ok to be friends with someone but not their partner Rumours, this girl is going to do wheelies around you if you don't drink a cup of wake the f**k up now and take some nip it in the bud action (I'm sorry-but really-you are in DEEP denial) It doesn't matter if you don't "feel" jealous or "think" she is boring, she is t-r-o-u-b-l-e She is a problem, she is out to sabotage stuff. Don't be the cool fiance, you don't have to prove to him how accepting you are, all bets are off when someone of the opposite sex makes a pass at your man or disrespects you and your relationship. Who's idea exactly was it to meet up? How often is your fiance in touch with her? You think you are going to invite her to your wedding and then she is going to fade out? Wrong-oShe should have faded out when she became his ex. Don't go farther with him until this gets taken care of, starting a new marriage with that person around is going to be your new nightmare. Seriously, I'm going to see you back here in break ups if you don't believe that by now. Put a stop to this, why are you putting up with this? Talk with your fiance, he needs to shut it down with her, HE needs to do it, not you. those signs above are MORE than enough, this is weird enough she is an ex, now she has shown her hand-and disrespected you and your relationship. And please-don't be nice to her or try to keep her close. I'd be bouncing off the walls going crazy if that happened. As for your part-DEFINITELY UNINVITE HER, promise me? Link to post Share on other sites
Author rumours83 Posted August 15, 2007 Author Share Posted August 15, 2007 basically the only reason she is invited is because i need other people in our family to tell my SO to see that it is inappropriate, as coming from me it just sounds like jealousy. i am not jealous, i do trust him i just don't trust her and think their relationship is totally unhealthy. he has admitted that he is sometimes even deliberately blind to any behaviour like that from his female "friends" for the sake of having a friendship. I have a lot of male friends but they are all very "matey" and it doesn't go any deeper than that. i would never nuture a relationship with any of them that could be described as "close" or intimate" as i know it means that at least one person in the friendship wants more! he totally didn't understand that and i did ask him if he would develop a relationship as intimate with a same sex friend, he said no as it would be a bit "gay". anyway after we are married we are going to be far to busy to see her - i'll make sure of that. i have already said no to him seeing her alone, i find her totally boring and a bit sad, so hopefully she will get fed up (and i will make her feel unwelcome)and p*ss off Link to post Share on other sites
georgejungle Posted August 15, 2007 Share Posted August 15, 2007 Why Play Games hoping family members will tell your SO that this is not cool?? why must you resort to "experiments?" Why bring her around? She's TOTALLY getting her way by being invited. Dump the dude. It's not YOUR job to try and get rid of this girl, It's YOUR DUDE's. If he can't be a MAN and stand up for the woman that he's going to marry, what the hell good is he? He should be the one taking care of this matter, not you. Seriously, this isn't your problem to take care of, it's your SO's job. Or am i totally missing something here? Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted August 15, 2007 Share Posted August 15, 2007 she also made some comment about how she thought it was ok to be friends with someone but not their partner whilst my partner was at the bar- to which i stated no. Did you and your partner discuss this little convo? If that is the case I don't see why you can't tell her that since she seemed only interested in friendship with him that it might be perceived as disrepectful to you marriage and married life to keep up contact. Tell her it was nice to met her, so sorry she will not be attending the wedding. That you wish her well and all that snide pooh. Fight for you man. Link to post Share on other sites
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