I need her back...

[norajane]

Well heres my situation...its been forever since I've posted but here it is.

 

I finally realized that we will never be in a relationship again. It just wont happen. She has built up a wall against it, and no matter how close I think I am getting to it, I will always be a mile away. I've gotten to the point that I don't want to see her, or hear about her. It just hurts too much, and I know if I distance myself from her, I will finally be able to move on. She's called me before and asked if I was mad at her, I told her no, we talked about random stuff, and hung up, quick 5 minute convo, didn't mean anything. I haven't seen her in quite a while, and I like it that way. It just hurts me too much.

 

Maybe it would be best if some of you would realize this too. Maybe it just won't happen...I know I've lost hope, and I am finally moving on. Sorry to be a downer, but this is whats happened to me.

 

25 pages later...

 

I'm sorry you're sad and in pain, but I think you're finally in the right mindframe to be able to move on. It gets a LOT better from here!!! You'll eventually be open to someone who can give you the kind of relationship you want - while you're mired in wishing you had someone back, you aren't *truly* noticing anyone else.

 

Good luck to you!

[MattyTee]

Hey DH,

 

I'm in agreement with you about not hearing about the ex. It has been much easier for me and I'm able to look after myself decently now. It allows the healing to take place and you can focus on the important relationship with yourself.

 

Honestly, I think the only way things can work out in the future is when we really do let things go in the past. I'm not going to be a pessimist about it all - I just think the only things in life we can control are our own actions. If it's meant to be with that person, then it will be - it just may take some time. Again, being able to really let go is the only way (in my mind).

[DH27]

****... I just had my first panic attack / relapse in a LONG time... I started freaking about because I started remembering stuff from when we were still together. I'm tired of feeling this way! I hate it and wish it would just end already. I had to get on here and re-read some things I said and what was said to me. Hell I just wish this ****ty situation would just end.

[MattyTee]

Hey man,

 

Sorry to hear that. I had a bit of a wobble yesterday and I know how you feel. Things do go up and down and remember that you have progressed a long way. Perhaps today or tomorrow that strength will fade but it will return.

 

Chin up!

[CD111]

DH27, I totally agree with what people have said in the last few posts. Move on, it's not fair to you that she is expecting you to be friends with her relatively soon after breaking up with you. You are in college, these should be some of the BEST times of your life. It's probably hard to picture that right now, but you should be out enjoying yourself. This girl definitely meant/means alot to you; however, she doesn't reciprocate. If things were meant to be between you two they eventually will. Who knows though, by the time she figures that out you may have already found someone else. Good Luck, don't feel too bad about it, consider it a lesson learned. Step away from the relationship, evaluate it objectively and learn what you can (the good and the bad). I always try to rationalize a bad situation by thinking that somehow it will make me a better and stronger person. It's really all you can do and then move on.

[DH27]

Thanks a lot for that guys. Those two posts helped me a lot. I am moving on, its just hard when you know it all could have been avoided. Once again, thank you.

[heartoutside]

I would do anything to be back at college right now!!! It's probably the easiest and best place to meet a good girl....now all I've got are bars

 

Go out there man, start talking to the cute girl that sits next to you in your chem class (but please make sure she doesn't have a BF, my ex is now dating some ass she sat next to in into to lit ).

 

the quicker you get out there and find some new friends or a new hottie the quicker your ex will be put in the back of your mind...

[DH27]

So have we seen the death of this thread?

 

Well I'm doing good. I've been talking to this one girl from back home, and we are gonna get together over Christmas break, so I'm happy about that. Hows everyone else doing?

[Travis L]

So weird... I hadn't checked this website in a couple of weeks and I just happen to think about it a half hour after you post again... Anyway, My ex and I are watching tv right now (I took a break from the show). We've decided to just be friends and I think it's for the best. Things look good for you, I wish you all the best man.

[niceguy27]

I am pursuing 2 different girls. One is a friend of mine that spends a lot of time with me and the other is someone from high school that I havent seen in almost 10 years. We went out on a "date" this past weekend and ended up spending the whole night together. Nothing happened but we are going to go out again.

 

The ex...Well, this is what happened a few weeks back...http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t135744/

 

We actually hung out last night for a late dinner. We have both kind of settle into a "friendship" thing. We both know where we stand but both know its not the right time for "us". So we get together about once every week or two and catch up, laugh, reminisce, and just have a good time. I love her dearly and dont want to let go completely of her. She told me last night that people will just have to get used to the fact that we are going to hang out occasionally.

 

So I think that this thread is on its last legs. We are all finally starting to either move on or accept things for what they are and have found a nice little compromise with our exs. But keep everyone updated on whats going on. I know I will!