Author Meaplus3 Posted August 18, 2007 Author Share Posted August 18, 2007 I don't hate you. I admire your ability to make a decision you can live with, even knowing all the potential pitfalls. That is the definition of courage. Good luck. Thank's for your kind word's. I can live with this, I know I can. The hardest thing I had to do so far was tell the man I married and the father of my three children that I became involved with another man, believe me it was very tough, however my H love's me enough to understand and now does realize just how close I was to a pa and leaving my family. I don't know how thing's will turn out for mm and W, I only hope they will work on what is clearly missing in their marriage! He's in denial that's a fact! And she has NOT a true clue. So why not give them a chance? If they split is was meant to be and I am sure that because mm had an ea with me that will not be the only factor. AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
mystic_pizza Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 Thank's for your kind word's. I can live with this, I know I can. The hardest thing I had to do so far was tell the man I married and the father of my three children that I became involved with another man, believe me it was very tough, however my H love's me enough to understand and now does realize just how close I was to a pa and leaving my family. I don't know how thing's will turn out for mm and W, I only hope they will work on what is clearly missing in their marriage! He's in denial that's a fact! And she has NOT a true clue. So why not give them a chance? If they split is was meant to be and I am sure that because mm had an ea with me that will not be the only factor. AP:) Oh boy...batten down the hatches, this is going to get interesting! Cliche is right, you are brave! Let us know how you make out. I guess you won't have to worry about him dumping his kids on you anymore whilst carrying on an A with his new OW. He is a total jerk for doing that. If he were doing that to me, those kids would be back at his house so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. Maybe this guy does need to be put on a leash. Good luck! Make sure you post an update. Just be prepared to be blamed for everything. I know you don't think it will that big of an issue, but it seems these two are in denial and will look for someplace to hang the blame. Maybe not, but just be prepared in case they do. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 18, 2007 Author Share Posted August 18, 2007 Oh boy...batten down the hatches, this is going to get interesting! Cliche is right, you are brave! Let us know how you make out. I guess you won't have to worry about him dumping his kids on you anymore whilst carrying on an A with his new OW. He is a total jerk for doing that. If he were doing that to me, those kids would be back at his house so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. Maybe this guy does need to be put on a leash. Good luck! Make sure you post an update. Just be prepared to be blamed for everything. I know you don't think it will that big of an issue, but it seems these two are in denial and will look for someplace to hang the blame. Maybe not, but just be prepared in case they do. Oh they are in denial alright! I am very ready to be blamed, let him and her blame me. I know the truth about what took place let him try to twist it and her believe it. Knowing her as well as I do, I think she will take his side to a degree, but she's the type that I believe would want to know everything, and everything it will be if she ask's I will tell. AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
Mino Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 Hi AP. Good Luck to you on Sunday!! You got my emotion stirred up too. I been getting the itch back since you started this thread:o I will be on line all evening to see how it went. Damn, wish I had the balls. I am having a rough day again, I hate it, I hate it , Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 18, 2007 Author Share Posted August 18, 2007 Hi AP. Good Luck to you on Sunday!! You got my emotion stirred up too. I been getting the itch back since you started this thread:o I will be on line all evening to see how it went. Damn, wish I had the balls. I am having a rough day again, I hate it, I hate it , Mino. So sorry that you are having a tough time, I know the feeling 's all to well. Thank's for you kindness, I do need to hear it! Sunday is my so called day for telling however I have to make sure I tell his wife and not regret this. I have had so many mixed op's on this that my brain is fried, LOL:lmao:. O AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 Sunday is my so called day for telling however I have to make sure I tell his wife and not regret this. I have had so many mixed op's on this that my brain is fried, When indoubt, do nothing...Take the time to really think about ALL the fallout and the affect(s) it will have on you, your husband, and most of your childen... Link to post Share on other sites
Hoping For the Best Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 No matter what you choose to do, make sure you are not doing it to make yourself feel better or to give yourself closure or to get satisfaction from putting a nail in his coffin. Hopefully she will have her own happy ending where she finds resolution and peace. But unless she asks you politely for information she needs to move on, you should seriously evaluate your motives for disclosure. And I hope that you have your own happy ending! Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 No, not at all. And I'm not sure why it seems you're trying to pick a fight with me, Trial. Everyone on here can give and should give advice until the cows come home. That's what we're here for. But for anyone to say they know, for a fact, that circumstances of GEL's (or anyone's affair) and exactly what it has done to her MM's W is wrong. She and her MM are closest to that...maybe they know, but the rest of us don't. I objected to what was stated as a known fact by someone who can't know that fact; I did not object to advice. *shrug* Just stating my opinion of your hypocrisy, which in effect was truly hypocrisy at it's utmost. When someone asks you a question more than once and you refused to answer based on the grounds that they are unable to understand your situation, how in the world you drew your above conclusion, only you can know. Try to remember the situation before spouting nonsense. Link to post Share on other sites
HappyAtLast Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 So does your XMM neighbor have only emotional affairs or does he have physical affairs also? Sorry to say AP, but this "ea" that you say you had with him, may have meant absolutely nothing to him ... not trying to be harsh, but I truly think that is your motivation for telling him. Please, please consider what others on here have been telling you. Link to post Share on other sites
Cliche Posted August 18, 2007 Share Posted August 18, 2007 Just stating my opinion of your hypocrisy, which in effect was truly hypocrisy at it's utmost. When someone asks you a question more than once and you refused to answer based on the grounds that they are unable to understand your situation, how in the world you drew your above conclusion, only you can know. Try to remember the situation before spouting nonsense. 1. Your posts are nonsensical. 2. They are bitter. Link to post Share on other sites
raslers Posted August 19, 2007 Share Posted August 19, 2007 Thank's but, My smoking HOT self, LOL:lmao: is telling the W on Sunday if I don't chicken out! MM normally golf's and she's home by herself! She need's to KNOW about his way's, it's so darn cruel! This man claim's he's happy? Well sure when you an Egotistical B****** and the W let's you get away with it, a dream come ture for a guy like him! Well I will put his dream to bed when I inform the poor woman just how he is! Sorry folk's hate me if you will but this is what I must do, tell her. AP:) What if you were to send an anonymous note and not announce yourself as the OW. You could just make it so that it was someone that was concerned for her and knew that the husband was behaving badly, but didn't want to give their name. Probably no better than telling her face to face. I don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
East of Jupiter Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 You woul be the worst person to tell his W. She is either already aware of the sitch or eventually a friend with no involvements will inform her.Why hasen't your H told her? No, no, no! She is the perfect person to tell the wife. The wife won't believe it otherwise and she needs to know. Hey? Are you ready for war? The good news is you won't have time to spend thinking about the MM anymore. You are going to be busy avoiding the wife! What are the laws in your state? In mine, all I need is for the person to be on my property. And most people are easy to drag across a yard. Especially an enraged BS who lives next door! How long have you been mocking her now? Did I tell you about the friend I know who was kidnapped by her MM and his wife? She was taken to a hotel room where they both took turns beating her to within an inch of her life. True story. I've seen the newspaper articles. Be careful what you wish for ... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 I didn't read the whole thread...but from what I read at the beginning... I think you want to tell her so that you get some kind of revenge… not closure. You told your husband about it, he didn’t leave you… lucky you… now you feel that she should know everything and hopefully she might leave him…hum. First of all, you told your husband what YOU wanted to tell HIM… now you want to tell his wife what YOU want to tell HER but in all this ‘kiss and tell’ situation, you want to keep the MM out of it… now this is weird and not too honest from you… IMO. I’ve always found that ‘kiss and tell’. somewhat ‘CRASS’… I would never ever try to ruin someone’s life when, in fact, I was the one who contributed and somehow ‘benefited’ from the situation. If I was the W, in this case, I would certainly question your intentions… Why tell her now? Now that your husband knows, now that you are no longer with him, now that he might see other women, what are your motives? When the A was in full swing, you didn’t feel the need to tell her… why now? Link to post Share on other sites
Mino Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 HHHHMMMMM today is Sunday and no sign of AP. I wonder if she is over there now????? I hope she show up tonight, I hope she is ok Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 HHHHMMMMM today is Sunday and no sign of AP. I wonder if she is over there now????? I hope she show up tonight, I hope she is ok Hi Mino, Well MM and his W were gone for the entire day so there for I could not tell. Thank's for thinking of me I am just fine! AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
NoIDidn't Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 Oh nevermind. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 So does your XMM neighbor have only emotional affairs or does he have physical affairs also? Sorry to say AP, but this "ea" that you say you had with him, may have meant absolutely nothing to him ... not trying to be harsh, but I truly think that is your motivation for telling him. Please, please consider what others on here have been telling you. Oh the ea meant very much to him hurt and alone because he told me that many times. Also there was a Slight PA involved here, just not Sex. AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
East of Jupiter Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Oh nevermind. I brought popcorn. Enough for everyone. This may take a while. Like a daytime soap opera, this drama isn't going anywhere. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Oh the ea meant very much to him hurt and alone because he told me that many times. Also there was a Slight PA involved here, just not Sex. AP, I just want to make sure you are hearing yourself talk here... This is the guy who you have learned has "done this before," and now you want to tell his wife because he is not owning up to it in a truthful way, right? And then you say you can be sure of his feelings because he told you? I just want to be clear on your reason for wanting to tell his wife: is it because he cheated on her, or because you now know you weren't the only one? Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I just want to be clear on your reason for wanting to tell his wife: is it because he cheated on her, or because you now know you weren't the only one? From the observer, it looks like she doesn't want the new OW to consummate the A with XMM...so she wants to bust him first... Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I brought popcorn. Enough for everyone. This may take a while. Like a daytime soap opera, this drama isn't going anywhere. Please pass the popcorn... So AnswerPlease, what are you thinking you are going to do? Did you know this guy was married? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 21, 2007 Author Share Posted August 21, 2007 AP, I just want to make sure you are hearing yourself talk here... This is the guy who you have learned has "done this before," and now you want to tell his wife because he is not owning up to it in a truthful way, right? And then you say you can be sure of his feelings because he told you? I just want to be clear on your reason for wanting to tell his wife: is it because he cheated on her, or because you now know you weren't the only one? I do "Feel" for her even though we are not friend's. It took this one Ea/slight pa for me to realize so much. I guess I just see them out and about and it seems' like he's put on an act. Beign that I am so darn heartfelt I know how I would feel if my H was having ea's behind my back and it would not make me a happy camper, so cruel! AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 21, 2007 Author Share Posted August 21, 2007 Please pass the popcorn... So AnswerPlease, what are you thinking you are going to do? Did you know this guy was married? Pass the Popcorn? You think this is a joke? Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 No, not at all. I do find it interesting. I am on this site to learn and I am sorry, but for me that also includes what to avoid and how to do so. I see that you are also married. I just read some of these posts from time to time to try to get an idea of how once happily married couples find themselves in this web. No offense intended. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Meaplus3 Posted August 21, 2007 Author Share Posted August 21, 2007 No, not at all. I do find it interesting. I am on this site to learn and I am sorry, but for me that also includes what to avoid and how to do so. I see that you are also married. I just read some of these posts from time to time to try to get an idea of how once happily married couples find themselves in this web. No offense intended. What are you trying to learn? Without knowing you story I am curious? AP:) Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts