Does this sound like someone who should ever get married?

[sancho2000]

i dont want to go through a divorce again, especially if there might be kids involved

 

i dont want to buy a diamond engagement ring

 

i dont want to get up in front of my family in front of a bunch of people and and they dont know and

 

say that i will be with someone forever, a second time

 

i dont want to do the above on the other side of the country, in a place that has little meaning for

 

me

 

i dont want to have to financially support someone else

 

i dont want to fight over stupid ****

 

i dont want to spend money on things i dont like

 

i dont want to be in a relationship where i am no longer respected, i dont respect the person i'm with

 

i dont want to worry about what other people think about me

 

i dont want to lose my sense of self

 

i want to get my master's degree and phd, and to work as hard as possible at it without feeling guilty

 

i want to be able to change careers if i want to and not worry about how it will affect someone else

 

i want to be able to get stoned and play guitar and come up with cool **** with my brother for as long

 

as i want to without feeling guilty, whenever i want to

 

i want to be able to see my friends, as myself and not always as part of a couple

 

i want to be able to stay in the house all weekend long sometimes

 

i want to keep myself fit--exercise when and how i want, eat what i want and when i want to (or dont

 

want to) eat it

 

i want to raise my dog the way i want to

 

i want to always want to have sex with the person i'm with, and i want them to want me also

 

i want to spend money on things i like, not on things i dont like

 

i want to ride a motorcycle accross the country

 

i want to snowboard my ass of while i can

 

i want to play basketball whenever i want to

[luvstarved]

Absolutely, as long as they find someone who more or less feels the same way. Otherwise, no.

[Mr. Lucky]

No, you don't sound like someone who should get married. Marriage is about building a life together, your focus is on your own goals and needs. Nothing wrong with that (in fact, parts of what you write sound like a hell of a lot of fun), it's just not conducive to matrimony...

 

Mr. Lucky

[4whatItsWorth]

Sounds to me like you're a very selfish person, or at least always wants to have it your way after realising that comprimising isn't something you're willing to do for that person you have sex with. Also, sounds like you're no way near to be a good committed partner to anyone.

 

You're neither marriage nor dating material.

[icemaiden]

Hi, no you dont sound like someone who should get married. I have no idea if you are currently in a relationship or not, you've not said. To be blunt, I really hope you're not for your potential partners sake. A marriage/relationship is about give and take and something both parties have to work on so I feel if this is you then I think you're best on your own and pleasing yourself. However, taking on board what you have said unless you change, in years to come you will be very lonely.

[EmotionallyYours]

Sancho - I think you already know the answer to this one. In fact, I'd break it off with her now so you don't waste anymore of her time. Search out some relationships with like-minded (or hearted) individuals. No commitment... not sure what they want either... just have fun for a while. (I'm assuming that you are in a relationship and she is pressuring to tie the knot)

 

You want to have fun for a while and you are in a selfish stage right now. Indulge it until you are ready. Why tie yourself down when you really don't want to?

[Hestia]

No. You don't sound in love.

[sancho2000]

Well, I'm going to share this list with my girlfriend tomorrow and see what she thinks, so we'll see what happens.

[Kwo-ne'-she]

It sounds as if you have your own wants and desires which you will place above all others....so no, you shouldn't get married. Marriage is about give and take, compromise, and if that isn't something you are willing to do at this point in your life, I wouldn't walk down the aisle. Save both of you some grief.

[New_Wife]

No. please don't.

[LucreziaBorgia]

Well, I'm going to share this list with my girlfriend tomorrow and see what she thinks, so we'll see what happens.

 

If she wants to be married badly enough, she will ignore your list and try to find ways to make it 'work'. People see what they want to see when it comes to something they really want, and even in the face of an entirely hopeless situation they will try to find some way to make it work for them. If you are going to show it to her, make it in the context of "this is why I'm saying goodbye" rather than "this is how I feel, should we break up?"

[sb129]

Well, I'm going to share this list with my girlfriend tomorrow and see what she thinks, so we'll see what happens.

 

If my BF shared a list like that with me, I would share with him the location of the door.

[sb129]

In fact, after reading that list again, a few things are clear to me

 

1. You aren't over your previous marriage.

 

2. You have a warped view that a meaningful relationship will mean that your life as you know it will cease, and you think thats a bad thing.

 

3. You aren't aware that compromise can take place in a R likely because of your previous bad experience, which is tainting your opinion on Rs.

 

4. You are supremely selfish, and the other persons interests don't feature at all. The only thing pertaining to being in a R in that list was sex- on YOUR terms. If thats all you want out of a R- it would be cheaper and less stressful to hire someone.

 

I don't know why you are bothering with being in a relationship at all if thats the way you feel. Let the poor woman off the hook so she can find someone else.