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my g/f of 18 months kissed someone else :(


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Hey everyone, my girlfriend recently went to visit her home country and took up ballet again. Her dance partner and her got close and they went to the fair and held hands, she told me about that and I was upset but got over it and just tonight she told me about the fact that they kissed the day she came back. She felt guilty but said she doesn't regret it because we were arguing and fighting in this trip so i think that pushed it into that area. We have been on rocky ground and finally talked tonight. I love her so much and it really broke my heart to hear this. That is part of the reason why she wanted to break up because of what she did but I still want to make this work because she feels like the one to me. I am so lost. Do I try and make this work or are we finished. On this trip she developed feelings and was confused, now I know that she wants to get back together and fix it. One thing she said though was that when she goes back to visit family and friends in December that she still wants to do ballet with him and hang out. She said that either way she'll be a slut because I will think of that while she is gone for winter break.We have been together for 19 months now and feel confused. I am angry, upset and sad at the same time. I want to be with her and can put this behind but I don't want her to hang around this "friend" of hers because, she is "confused" and said that it can be hard to resist. Later tonight she said that she would not pursue anything once we got back together and fixed our relationship and this mess. I still want to be with her but I know that I won't be able to get it out of my head and come December I know that I will be worried, if she stays faithful I will be relieved but that is 2-3 weeks of frustration. I trusted her and it bit me in the ass. On this trip she told me that her feelings for me dropped and doesn't know what she feels for the guy, but wants us to make this relationship better. Should I give it another chance or is this over? Thank you for your time.

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She felt guilty but said she doesn't regret it because we were arguing and fighting in this trip so i think that pushed it into that area.

 

This is your answer.

 

You did NOT push her into doing anything. She is an adult and capable of making her own choices, and she chose to kiss another guy.

One thing she said though was that when she goes back to visit family and friends in December that she still wants to do ballet with him and hang out. She said that either way she'll be a slut because I will think of that while she is gone for winter break.

If she really wanted it to work out between you she would stay away from him out of respect for you.

I don't want her to hang around this "friend" of hers because, she is "confused" and said that it can be hard to resist.

 

If cheating is too hard to resist, then you shouldn't be in a relationship at all.

 

On this trip she told me that her feelings for me dropped and doesn't know what she feels for the guy, but wants us to make this relationship better.

 

She wants to have her cake and eat it too- a classic ego stroking exercise.

As long as you let her, she has all the power.

She is going away, and she has told you she will still see the other guy, whether you ask her not to or not.

If you let her get away with that, she knows you will come running back if she ends up kissing the guy again.

 

I would end it if i were you. This girl is going to cause you nothing but heartache if she says things like that to you.

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beautifuldisaster

Do you really want to worry everytime you have an argument, that she is going to go running into someone else's arms and then use the excuse that you 2 were fighting? She cheated on you (yes kissing IS cheating). She said it will be hard to resist him because she's confused about her feelings....but she still wants to hang out with him?? She's obviously not ready for a relationship. The only mature thing she did was tell you the truth. Now you have the choice of whether you want to live like that or not. If I were you I would RUN, not walk, but RUN from this situation. If you don't, you'll be in for a WORLD of hurt. Good luck.

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