willing to do anything

[Bull72]

[sIZE=2]sunday

she was supposed to hang out with me but her mom said she couldnt and then her mom said she could go have dinner with her friend who lives clear cross houston so she did

wednesday

my grandmother comes into town from mississippi and we are supposed to spend the next week with her so we have dinner with my grnadmother

thursday

we were supposed to go shopping all day and she had to have lunch with her grandmother and so she couldnt go and she was supposed to call me when she got done but instead i called her at 2:30 and found out she got done with lunch at 1 and then went with her friend ian whose this little druggy to get snowcones and hung out with him at the school in the book room. then we salvage 4 hours of shopping Thursday night she calls me and we talk about the next day and the last thing we said to each other before we broke up was { Her: I just want space, Me: you just want andy(that guy) }

friday

she decidees she cant go antique shopping b/c shes going in the morning to get her license so then in the afternoon she decides to go hang out with her friend andy because hes going off to rudgers soon. so friday we dont talk at all and she does what she planned on doing getting her license and going to dinner with andy and going back to her house and watching a movie

saurday

i get on myspace and find a message that went somethign like this

{

i wont be able to go to dinner. i have some stuff to do tonite.

 

id like a clean break between us. i want to start new for the school year. im sorry im doing this via myspace but i dont feel comfortable telling you in person or even on the phone.

 

tell your grandmother it was nice meeting her. ill be by this weekend to give you the purse and you calendar and some other stuff.

 

im sorry. }

and so later on that day i met with her best friend whose a gay guy and we talked and he really opened my eyes to the fact that those guys really werent threats

sunday we meet to talk and get food and i bring her her favorite ice cream and flowers and the stuffed animal she gave me and then we start talking abou tus and then she just gets in her car and leaves because she "couldnt handle talking about us just yet"

monday

so on monday i ask if i can come over in the morning and wake her up and talk with her and she says ok so then i go over there and we start talkign about us once again and she refuses to listen so eventually i left after she tol dme to and i went home and threw up for 2 hours

Tuesday

so on tuesday i wrote her a jounal that said basically that i wanted to give her space but that i would never stop loving her (that was her reason for giving each toher space so that we could get over one another) and so later that night she called me and was juts like i dont get the point of this and so we talked on the phone that night and we started fighting because we started talking about us. So then after fighting we got off the phone and that was the end of that conversatoin

 

Wednesday

so on wedneseday i went to go help out at the school ( which shes in charge of) and i completely ignored her or well tried and so she called me and was like hey your working i havent seen you and i was just like yea... so then after tryign to ignore her/ be kinda rude but not crude ( ya know?) and so that night like 7 or 8 of us met and we sat aroudn and we were supposed to talk about officer positions for our Student Council and so the arguement got superheated and then i just got up paid our waitress for Her meal and just left and told the waitress to tel her to call me and then she called later that night and was like yea we started talkign about us again and so we both got mad and she was like i kinda missed you wanna go get coffee in the morning so i said sure and so we got off the phone

 

Thursday

so thursday i went over to her house and she answered in pj's and was like im really tired mind if we lay down. So we went and laid down in her bed but on opposite sides but she kinda played footsies with me and then she was like whats wrong and i just said i really want to cuddle and she was like we could but i dont want you to get the wrng idea and think that were gonna get back together just because we cuddle so once again we start talking about us and shes just like ahhhh leave so then right as i was leaving i turned around and was like you told me never to leave you and yet you just constently push me away. so i wrote a letter to her via myspace which will be at the bottom of this and then it flooded really bad here on thursday like 4 feet of water on som estreets and sometimes more so i called her worried about her and told her like if you need me to come get you i will come get you in a heartbeat no problem like if you get stuck i will walk up there its only 3 miles and she wa like yea yea yea and then she got home finally got the message and then she im's me and is like hey do you want to go get some coffee if i can and so then she was like nevermidn my mom said no. so we didnt do anything so later that night she jumped online and our conversatoin went something like this

{

Her: alright well ima call you soon ok?

Me: what time

Her: 11:10? is that ok

Me: just call me at 11:11 cuz thats what time i wished for you ( we started casiually dating 11/11 nov. 11th)

 

and then she didnt say anythign for a while so 10 minutes later

 

Me: please dont hate me im sorry for saying that

Her: aww i dont hate you

Her: it was cute

 

}

 

friday

so Friday comes around and she never calls and so then tonight we start talking and then tongihts conversation goes something like this

{

Me: hi

Me: i just texted you

Her: really?

Me: yea

Her: i dont ahve my phone with me

Me: cuz you wouldnt answer the phone

Me: oh what happened to it?

Her: its in my room

Me: oh just asking

Me: cuz you didnt call me last night

Her: sorry

Her: someone called

Her: and we talked til two

Her: and i didnt want to call and wake you at two

Me: wtf? who called?

Her: hah

Her: someone

Me: wth?

Me: whats your problem?

Me: hah

Me: so have you just replaced me now?

Her: ?

Me: you were supposed to call me last night

Me: and you didnt

Me: then your excuse is just well someone else called

Me: so i talkd to them until too

Me: we go to starbucks or somethign

Her: no

Her: ive been there today

Her: moms not happy

Me: hmm

Me: well

Me: are we ever going to talk

Me: i at least wanna talk about the message

Me: and then i would like to talk about today

Her: i dont have a message

Her: and theres nothing to talk about

Me: will you just call me and talk to me

Her: no

Her: im busy

Me: so can we at least talk on here then?

Her: sure

Me: ok

Me: so

Me: about the message

Me: what do you think

Her: what message?

Her: i dont have a text

Me: no the myspace message

Her: oh

Her: i havent downloaded it

Her: i really am busy

Me: oh i meant the one befor that

Her: the really long one?

Me:yup

Her: where you told me you wouldnt call or im?

Her: where you told me you were giving me space?

Me: you got the text it said i wanted to talk to you one last time before all this took effect

Her: great

Me: well what do you think about what i wrote

Her: i wish youd actually give me the space you promised

Her: for once

Me: but its like i sent that and your like do you wanna go to starbucks

Me: so im confused

Me: so what do you think about the rest of it?

Her: i really dont remember

Her: and i dont even have it now

Her: id rather not talk

Her: im busy

Me: what with?

Her: signed off at 9:21:11 PM.

Her: is offline and will receive your IMs when signing back in.

Her: signed off at 10:22:53 PM.

 

 

The letter is below this line

_________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________

Here and this is just it. I will always want another chance because I NEVER lied when I told you that I love you or that I care about you or that I was happy with you and I really always was and always really will be.

 

So when your willing to give me a chance and love a chance and take that leap of faith then so be it. But so long as you continue to persistently throw away our relationship and throw EVERYTHING BACK IN MY FACE THAT I EVER TOLD YOU then I will not talk with you, you can call me and then I might answer, whether its by choice or I physically cant, that will be the extent of our communication

 

Until you can realize that love and I’m worth it because I could offer you the world and as much as you don’t want me to change for you I already have because your worth it and I love you and I always will that’s why I’m doing this now.

 

Maybe if I completely cut you out of my life until your ready to talk to me about tit you will realize what you have and want it back. And I will always be offering it no matter if its tomorrow or 18 years down the road no matter whom either of us is with in 2 years

 

If I decide to date someone again then I will tell her I love this girl Caitlin June Barnett and if she ever comes around your gone because she was my first love and yea she tore me up and pushed me to ending all of me all the time, but we have a special bond and no matter how much she hates me and verbally abuses me I will always always love her and that you (the other girl) will always come second in my life

 

And just in case something might happen to me you should open the safe underneath my bed, the moneybox. You have a key to my house and that safe and just read it because you will find it very interesting.

 

Don't ever regret or feel guilty for the things your doing because when you say you feel guilty it means that you fought that part of you that wanted something and you felt guilty for fighting against it not feeling guilty for wanting something in it's self

 

And one more thing before I go

"Forever and Always" my heart will be yours.

 

And if you want to ever know how much I love you or how much I miss you just look up at the stars and number them off one by one

 

So here's your space. If you decide to call and I for some reason don't answer then I will check my voicemail and call you right back. So if its really that important leave a voicemail I love those.

 

But until then I bid you ado and I hope that today at the door wasn’t the last time we ever talk... so when your miss me and your ready to tell me the truth and take that leap of faith just call me and you can have your second chance and on the off chance something does happen to me I told you where to find the answers

 

 

 

 

So after reading all of that I now do not know what to do im lost without words I want to get her back so bad and all she ever says that she wants space so that she can move on and so that I can get over her but I wrote that letter in hopes to tell her that I will never get over her and that I really really do love her

And I need to know what steps do I take from here if I back off will she move on

The reasons I have gotten for her breaking up with me is that

1. she has a whole whole lot on her plate – which im willing to reduce stress anyway possible
   
2. we argue way too much
   
3. and I need to give her time to spend with other guys

and ive fixed all those problems but she doesn’t want to give me the chance to show her because hses given me so many chances before and that even if I did prove it she wouldn’t ever consider dating me again but for some reason I think shes lying

so whats the best approach to getting hre back how should I go about gifts and romance and being sweet without smothering her

I need help please

[/sIZE]

[LucreziaBorgia]

Her: i wish youd actually give me the space you promised

 

Until you back off, and leave her alone - every single thing you do, say and write to her is going to push her away further.

 

1. so whats the best approach to getting hre back

 

2. how should I go about gifts and romance and being sweet without smothering her

 

1. By doing as she asked, and giving her lots of space. Meaning you don't call, write, or hang out with her. If you have even an iota of a chance, it will be because she misses you. She can't miss you if you are always there.

 

2. You don't. Gifts and romance right now ARE smothering.

[dr strangelove]

Look dude dont start the cycle of games. Just find someone who wants to hang out with you etc or learn to live on your own or get a pet.

[Bull72]

but ya know i dont want to get over her and i dont want to just leaave her i love her and so im hoping that if i jut give her 4-5 days of space and i just go over there monday to talk to herr about whats going on in her life that it might help relieve some of the stress

[LucreziaBorgia]

I wouldn't go over there. Just wait for her to contact you. Do not contact her in any way, shape or form while you are waiting. I'm telling you - you have no power whatsoever to change her mind. All you can do is change your actions and see if that has any effect on her. Obviously your actions of trying to 'be there' for her aren't working. In fact she told you point blank that she wants you to leave her alone and give her space. If you keep trying to 'be there' for her and 'win her back' you will be met again and again with the "I need space" thing, and if you continue she will simply cut you off completely.

[Bull72]

she the thing is i confr4onted her about that and yea know she watns me to be therer eto relieve her stress for her but at the same time having a boyfriend is too much added stress and so i asked her yaknow you told me to never leave but you want me to go away what do you want from me and so she told me yea know like i want you there to tlak to me and pyour the only one that can calm me down when im upset but i am the reason shes upset sometimes and so i just i dunno if i shoudl still be there for her like as she put it "sisters"/ best friends or comepletely wait for her to call me or w/e