the other woman manifesto

[Impudent Oyster]

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Hmm...Once upon a time there was a GreenEyedLady and she met a man...and he said he was divorced and he sure seemed like it and so they dated and dated and dated...

 

That's how some A's start...

 

So, when you found out he lied to you from day 1 about being divorced, you naturally kicked him to the curb, right?

[NoIDidn't]

"the rest of you commoners"

 

I will have to use that next time since it seemed to have slipped under the radar as an insult.

[annabelle75]

Fine, instead of telling us how wrong we are, and how much we generalize, why don't you tell us how A's start? If we've got it all wrong, then tell us how it is. Is that so hard?

 

Again, TELL US how affairs "actually happen". Wouldn't that be more efficient than continually whining about how wrong we are?

 

This reminds me of AP who constantly talked about what horrible things MM "did to her". In the end, he had done nothing, by her own admission, in earlier posts. It was just her perception that had changed, but the reality was a different story altogether.

 

Ummmmm .... well ... a man and a woman meet and discover they have good chemistry and enjoy each others company. The then begin seeign each other and the relationship progresse sin an emotional and physical way. Just like any other relationship. Its not a big mystery or anything.

[Impudent Oyster]

"the rest of you commoners"

 

I will have to use that next time since it seemed to have slipped under the radar as an insult.

 

Oh my, I missed it too! We have royalty in our midst? Camilla, is that you?

[GreenEyedLady]

[

 

 

So, when you found out he lied to you from day 1 about being divorced, you naturally kicked him to the curb, right?

 

Have you even read my posts, or is your comprehension off?

[Impudent Oyster]

Ummmmm .... well ... a man and a woman meet and discover they have good chemistry and enjoy each others company. The then begin seeign each other and the relationship progresse sin an emotional and physical way. Just like any other relationship. Its not a big mystery or anything.

 

So you're saying that the fact that the man or woman is married is a complete non-issue, so long as the two of you are having a good time? Interesting, and totally beyond the realm of my comprehension.

 

Also, how can it be like any other relationship, especially when no one is supposed to know about it?

 

I can't imagine not being able to call my S/O whenever I felt like it, or to go to his home or he to mine any time, any day.

[Impudent Oyster]

Have you even read my posts, or is your comprehension off?

 

I apologize for not clicking on your name and reading all of your backstory, but I don't have that kind of time.

 

I just assumed that any woman who found out she was duped by a liar into getting involved with him would tell him to hit the road when the truth came out.

 

The whole relationship is based on a lie, from the very start.

[Cobra_X30]

So you're saying that the fact that the man or woman is married is a complete non-issue, so long as the two of you are having a good time? Interesting, and totally beyond the realm of my comprehension.

 

Also, how can it be like any other relationship, especially when no one is supposed to know about it?

 

I can't imagine not being able to call my S/O whenever I felt like it, or to go to his home or he to mine any time, any day.

 

I didnt catch any moral judgments attached to that post... Im not sure where you did.

[Impudent Oyster]

Cobra, are you talking to me?

[annabelle75]

So you're saying that the fact that the man or woman is married is a complete non-issue, so long as the two of you are having a good time? Interesting, and totally beyond the realm of my comprehension.

 

Also, how can it be like any other relationship, especially when no one is supposed to know about it?

 

I can't imagine not being able to call my S/O whenever I felt like it, or to go to his home or he to mine any time, any day.

 

You asked a question and we gave you an answer. To accpet the answer is to have to ackowledge that As are real relationships. Its easier for you to believe they are some sort of convoluted fanatasy with no basis to the real world.

 

You keep asking "how do they start" and "how could two people do such a thing" but you won't accept the answers since they don't fit into your agenda in asking the questions.

 

How would you feel if someone turned it around and told you:

 

"You must have low self esteem and be too afriad to be alone since you have chosen to stay with a man that cheated on you. In fact, just the fact that you married a cheater in the first place shows how little you value yourself. You should have been able to tell he was a liar."

 

I'm suspecting that would not go over too well with you.

[movinon05]

So you're saying that the fact that the man or woman is married is a complete non-issue, so long as the two of you are having a good time? Interesting, and totally beyond the realm of my comprehension.

 

Also, how can it be like any other relationship, especially when no one is supposed to know about it?

 

I can't imagine not being able to call my S/O whenever I felt like it, or to go to his home or he to mine any time, any day.

 

You asked a simple question. How do A's start. You got your answer from a few people as to exactly how A's start. Yet you come up with all of this and are now putting words in Annabelle's mouth? THIS is where the problems start!

[Impudent Oyster]

You asked a question and we gave you an answer. To accpet the answer is to have to ackowledge that As are real relationships. Its easier for you to believe they are some sort of convoluted fanatasy with no basis to the real world.

 

I have no doubt that one of the affair partners thinks, they're real, but as Cobra said, when they see the light of day, that's when they end. They can't be sustained in reality, so in that case, they aren't real.

 

If it's a real relationship simple exposure can't kill it. Affairs are BS, they don't survive outside of their hiding places.

 

You keep asking "how do they start" and "how could two people do such a thing" but you won't accept the answers since they don't fit into your agenda in asking the questions.

 

No, I only asked how they start (I have my own theory), because TC insist that I've got it all wrong. They start like all relationships, with attraction, the difference is, no one has the integrity to say no and do the right thing, that's why they go beyond the attraction stage.

 

 

How would you feel if someone turned it around and told you:

 

"You must have low self esteem and be too afriad to be alone since you have chosen to stay with a man that cheated on you. In fact, just the fact that you married a cheater in the first place shows how little you value yourself. You should have been able to tell he was a liar."

 

I'm suspecting that would not go over too well with you.

 

I'd probably laugh. I've been married a long time, and my husband has many, many good qualities, we have a very nice life, great sex, great conversation, a lot of fun, good friends, great kids, he treats me well, is smart, ambitious, successful, hell, why would I throw that away because he temporarily lost his mind? I'm not stupid, if he were a loser, or treated me badly or I just plain didn't love him anymore, then I'd have had no problem kicking him to OW's waiting arms, but that's not my situation.

 

I wouldn't cut-off my nose to spite my face, and I didn't marry "a cheater" in the first place, if anyone told be I should've been able to tell he was a liar I would think that person was a complete moron.

[Impudent Oyster]

You asked a simple question. How do A's start. You got your answer from a few people as to exactly how A's start. Yet you come up with all of this and are now putting words in Annabelle's mouth? THIS is where the problems start!

 

What problems? Or do you consider intelligent discussion to be a problem?

[RealityCheck]

Got problems? Need help in understanding?

 

Our free phone center is open to anytime you want to hear yourself talk. Where you don't want to listen. Just hear your voice talk.

Call 1-800-------

[annabelle75]

I have no doubt that one of the affair partners thinks, they're real, but as Cobra said, when they see the light of day, that's when they end. They can't be sustained in reality, so in that case, they aren't real.

 

If it's a real relationship simple exposure can't kill it. Affairs are BS, they don't survive outside of their hiding places.

 

 

 

No, I only asked how they start (I have my own theory), because TC insist that I've got it all wrong. They start like all relationships, with attraction, the difference is, no one has the integrity to say no and do the right thing, that's why they go beyond the attraction stage.

 

 

 

 

I'd probably laugh. I've been married a long time, and my husband has many, many good qualities, we have a very nice life, great sex, great conversation, a lot of fun, good friends, great kids, he treats me well, is smart, ambitious, successful, hell, why would I throw that away because he temporarily lost his mind? I'm not stupid, if he were a loser, or treated me badly or I just plain didn't love him anymore, then I'd have had no problem kicking him to OW's waiting arms, but that's not my situation.

 

I wouldn't cut-off my nose to spite my face, and I didn't marry "a cheater" in the first place, if anyone told be I should've been able to tell he was a liar I would think that person was a complete moron.

 

Then why are you so obsessed with this forum? Are you trying to convince us or your self that his A wasn't real? Why does it even matter what we think?

[annabelle75]

Got problems? Need help in understanding?

 

Our free phone center is open to anytime you want to hear yourself talk. Where you don't want to listen. Just hear your voice talk.

Call 1-800-------

 

:lmao:

 

I have yet to understand how twisting my post and putting words in my mouth qualifies as "Intelligent Discussion." Maybe we all do live in a fanstasy land.

[Impudent Oyster]

Then why are you so obsessed with this forum? Are you trying to convince us or your self that his A wasn't real? Why does it even matter what we think?

 

I'm hardly obsessed. See when I joined? See how many posts I have?

 

Now see when you joined? See how many posts you have?

 

Are you trying to avoid my question?

 

My H had an affair of sorts (very similar to AP's situation), but the fact that he is mortified and embarassed by the mere mention of OW's name makes me realize just how stupid and unreal it was. She stroked his ego, and she thought it was love. He thought it was nothing.

[RealityCheck]

:lmao:

 

I have yet to understand how twisting my post and putting words in my mouth qualifies as "Intelligent Discussion." Maybe we all do live in a fanstasy land.

 

Some hunny! Not all!

[Impudent Oyster]

:lmao:

 

I have yet to understand how twisting my post and putting words in my mouth qualifies as "Intelligent Discussion." Maybe we all do live in a fanstasy land.

 

I have to assume that the fact that a man is married is a non-issue to you, so long as you're having a good time. If you won't refute that I have no choice.

[RealityCheck]

I'm hardly obsessed. See when I joined? See how many posts I have?

 

Now see when you joined? See how many posts you have?

 

Are you trying to avoid my question?

 

My H had an affair of sorts (very similar to AP's situation), but the fact that he is mortified and embarassed by the mere mention of OW's name makes me realize just how stupid and unreal it was. She stroked his ego, and she thought it was love. He thought it was nothing.

 

That's a bunch of crap! If it was nothing, why even be there!

 

Then you are admitting you are nothing? Is that how you feel about yourself? Nothing?

[Impudent Oyster]

That's a bunch of crap! If it was nothing, why even be there!

 

Then you are admitting you are nothing? Is that how you feel about yourself? Nothing?

 

Oh dear god...do you have a library card? I wish you would make use of it.

[annabelle75]

I have to assume that the fact that a man is married is a non-issue to you, so long as you're having a good time. If you won't refute that I have no choice.

 

:lmao: You're killing me now. It must be easy to argue with people when you just "make up" their end of the conversation.

[Impudent Oyster]

:lmao: You're killing me now. It must be easy to argue with people when you just "make up" their end of the conversation.

 

And still, no response. Thank you, that's what I thought.

[annabelle75]

I'm hardly obsessed. See when I joined? See how many posts I have?

 

Now see when you joined? See how many posts you have?

 

Are you trying to avoid my question?

 

My H had an affair of sorts (very similar to AP's situation), but the fact that he is mortified and embarassed by the mere mention of OW's name makes me realize just how stupid and unreal it was. She stroked his ego, and she thought it was love. He thought it was nothing.

 

Sure. And thats why you spend your time on LS in this in this forum. Sure. It was nothing at all.

[Cobra_X30]

I'd probably laugh. I've been married a long time, and my husband has many, many good qualities, we have a very nice life, great sex, great conversation, a lot of fun, good friends, great kids, he treats me well, is smart, ambitious, successful, hell, why would I throw that away because he temporarily lost his mind? I'm not stupid, if he were a loser, or treated me badly or I just plain didn't love him anymore, then I'd have had no problem kicking him to OW's waiting arms, but that's not my situation.

 

I wouldn't cut-off my nose to spite my face, and I didn't marry "a cheater" in the first place, if anyone told be I should've been able to tell he was a liar I would think that person was a complete moron.

 

Thanks for the quote. That is very true that most A thrive off lies an deciept. Who tells those lies? I want you to pay special attention to the lines I quote you here on.

 

I submit to you that your H did not suffer some kind of temporary insanity. Why do you believe that your H did this to you and your family??