someonew/aname Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 I went out with this woman the other night and had a great time. I want to see her again but I don't see anything serious in the future. This comes from the fact that she is much older than me. I am 27 and she is 44. We work together and she asked me out for drinks. We went out and had a great time. When she asked me out I thought she was 30 - 35, she doesn't look 44 and stays in great shape. I think that I am fascinated with the fantasy of an attractive older woman but I don't have a lot in common with her. When we ended the date the other night we agreed to keep this between us at the office. My question is how do I explain this to her? I am very attracted to her sexualy, but there is not much more. I don't want to lead her on thinking there is something more going on. I just want to go out and have fun with her as well as other people. Also, I just got out of a LTR so I don't want to settle down right away. How can I tell her that I want a no strings attached sexual relationship? I don't want to hurt her, she is a very nice person. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 If you're hell bent on having this be just a sexual relationship, put that forth to her and see what her reaction is. If that's your agenda she needs to know right now and decide for herself if that's something she wants to get involved with. Otherwise, you can tell her you don't feel comfortable getting too involved with somebody from the office and just drop it right there. She may be open to a simple, sexual relationship, especially if she hasn't had any in a while. On the other hand, she may be fond of you in other ways and therefore reluctant to limit it to a strictly sexual thing. You always run the risk of having the lady fall for you emotionally, even if she agrees at the outset to keep it limited to sex. You would be doing yourself and her a tremendous favor by spending some time looking for a lady closer to your age with whom you share lots in common and to whom you are also very attracted. I think that's the way it ought to be. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 EGad! I hate that "older woman" phrase -- makes me think of Betty Davis a week before she died! Speaking as someone in her age bracket, be honest with her. Tell her how you feel. Maybe that's all she wants too since she asked you out, then asked that you say nothing to anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
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