petal Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 This is another long story so I appologise now. I met the object of my affections about a year and a quater ago through mutual friends. Most of the time I see him is on nights out. When we first met he was going out with a long term girlfriend who subsequently cheated on him and they broke up 2 months after we met. Shortly after that we were out and he admited to my friend that he was on the rebound and totally just wanted to kiss somone that night, so she said to him, oh she would, apparently he was suprised, but later that night we did kiss and it was lovely, but as he fully admited being on rebound nothing happened. We continued going out as friends, then about 2 months later on a drunken night out I was cuddling him as I quite often did and thought what the heck and kissed him. Once again nothing happened, he totally thought it was a drunken thing. About seven months passed. It gets more and more complecated, on one very drunken celebratory night we got very drunk and I ended going back to his house to sleep, which is not unusual, he quite often asks me back. This time though as a laugh(we were very drunk) he persuaded me that I should get naked, which I did partly only cos i new he could not see me coz had taken contacts out, then he was trying to get me to put my clothes back on and do a strip tease for him, which i refused. I could tell( think about it) that he was very excited, and kept on trying to put his glasses on. At the time he was saying how screwed up he is about women and kept saying "we`re just friends" to which I replyed "I know" absolutly nothing happened that night, and things were fine, just all friends in the morning with absolutly no awkwardness. In the following months we have become very good friends, he is now totally over ex and is always saying how he needs to meet a good woman, wants to be loves etc. and all the time I am thinking, HELLO!!!! im here. Now he`s starting to date other women. Thing is also when we`re on nights out I get drunk and go off and pull other men, coz that is easyer than trying for him. Should I tell him I like him? I feel that it is make or break time but really wish I knew if he liked me before I ruin our friendship. Plus am extremmly bad at asking men out especially ones I care so much for. HELLLLP!! Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 Don't say anything to him. Move on and find a guy who will treat you with respect. I hate to have to say this, but this guy does not seem interested in you. I know that probably hurts to hear. If he was interested in you, he has had over a year to ask you out properly. If he was interested in you, there is no way on this Earth that he would discuss dating other women with you. He has made excuses over and over again. ("We're just friends", "I'm on the rebound", "We were just drunk") That is not what a man who is interested in a woman says to her. A man who is interested in a woman (or who has any hope of future interest) does not ask her to get naked for him and do a strip tease while she is drunk. He also does not say to a woman he is interested in that "He needs to find a good woman." He would instead say "How can I find a woman like you?" Stop staying the night at his place. Stop going out and getting drunk with him. Just quietly float away. If he wants you in his life, trust me, he will come running after you, and you won't have to say a word. Men respond to actions, not words. It will do you no good to have a "talk" with him, especially a long, drawn out talk about how much you like him. Just walk away and let him notice your absence. If he doesn't notice, then you have the answer to your question as to whether or not he likes you. Link to post Share on other sites
petal Posted March 31, 2003 Share Posted March 31, 2003 Thats a very good point that if he liked me he would say a woman like me. I think I tend to send out confused signals to him too, coz im trying to be a friend to him I point out women he would like to try and cover my tracks. I dont think I will be able to stop going out with him completely but will try and spend more time talking to other members of the group so he has to make an effort to come and talk to me. It is very helpful to speek to people who are not involved so can be objective, Thank You. Link to post Share on other sites
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