beachbabi Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 Hi, I saw this guy a couple of times and he made it clear that he prefered to just see me casually, more specifically for casual sex. I was quite thown by this idea because it isn't something i've done before. I initially disagreed with the idea and made that quite clear to him. After going out just twice and messing around quite a bit with him the second time, but not having sex i haven't heard back from him in a few weeks now. I believe it is because i initially made it clear that i didn't like seeing someone casually and he would have thought he'd not get any further with me. I totally understand why he'd think that way. I have since changed my mind about seeing this guy casually. I don't think he's the kind of guy i'd want to date properly, but definately someone i'd like to have a bit of fun with because i am quite attracted to him physically. Any ideas what i could do to get that point across? I have one interesting idea in mind, but curious if anyone else has any suggestions first. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 YOU ASK: "Any ideas what i could do to get that point across?" Your ONLY way of letting him know you are now interested is to call him and tell him or see him face to face. That's the way people communicate on planet earth. I personally wouldn't have anything to do with somebody who had so little respect for me that they would totally cease all contact with me if I wouldn't go to bed with them. I don't see how you could retain a physical attraction for a subhuman, scuzzbum user like that no matter how good looking he may be. He is clearly a user and to give that kind of person a victory is a sin against mankind. He doesn't even regard you as a human being...only as a receptacle for his penis. Then again, maybe if he has been able to get you to be willing to compromise your morals and values...it might be OK in that case. If you can't get ahold of him, you'll be able to find lots of others willing to participate in the same arrangement. Just pick a guy and let him know. Link to post Share on other sites
beachbabi Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 Calling and face to face is difficult if he avoids it. I did have another option that would get his attention in mind. Yeah i agree with this statement, "I personally wouldn't have anything to do with somebody who had so little respect for me that they would totally cease all contact with me if I wouldn't go to bed with them." But then again, who's to say i wouldn't have my way with him and never contact him again after that. Perhaps two can play at that game. "Then again, maybe if he has been able to get you to be willing to compromise your morals and values...it might be OK in that case." What do you mean by that statement?? "If you can't get ahold of him, you'll be able to find lots of others willing to participate in the same arrangement. Just pick a guy and let him know." There is plenty of guys who like the sound of that arrangement, but its not something i like to publicise. For some reason or another this guy took my interest in this way. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 YOU ASK: ""Then again, maybe if he has been able to get you to be willing to compromise your morals and values...it might be OK in that case." What do you mean by that statement??" You wrote that you initially disagreed with the idea and made it "quite clear to him." Something obviously happened in your reconsideration that caused you to compromise your values that made you turn him down initially. You also wrote: "I believe it is because i initially made it clear that i didn't like seeing someone casually..." That indicates a moral or value that you possessed at the time...which you have reconsidered. Additionally, you wrote: "I have since changed my mind about seeing this guy casually. I don't think he's the kind of guy i'd want to date properly, but definately someone i'd like to have a bit of fun with because i am quite attracted to him physically." That indicates your attraction to him has prompted to reconsider doing something your previous values would not have permitted you to do. I hope this clarifies what I meant by my statement, which you questioned. Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 Sorry but this guy either ONLY wants sex...and is just telling you all that to make you feel better...or he has more issues than National Geographic. Link to post Share on other sites
amorsiempre Posted April 1, 2003 Share Posted April 1, 2003 honey... move on Link to post Share on other sites
Kidd Seuss Posted April 2, 2003 Share Posted April 2, 2003 [color=darkred]If you choose someone to fiddle around with, I think it would be wise to choose someone who you could either be sexual with or just hang out to watch some TV when you are both bored. Not someone who will drop you like a hot potato when you say "no sex". I think there has to be a certain air of respect in a situation like this. And its clear he has no respect for you. Drew [/color] Link to post Share on other sites
beachbabi Posted April 2, 2003 Share Posted April 2, 2003 very true Tony. I guess i had mixed thoughts about this person from the beginning. I was interested, but his responses towards me made me weiry and not like seeing him seriously. Plus i have never experienced casual dating and wondered how i may handle it, he seemed suitable at the time. Sure if he had treated me like a human being (not dropped me like a hat), then things may have turned out quite nicely and a bit of fun may have been in the near future, but he obviously couldn't wait. Link to post Share on other sites
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