Chance for a third chance?

[trendyaznchica]

After reading everyone's situations, I feel like mine is so trivial because I am only 21 and I have time to love and lose and etc, but here it is anyway... it is rather long, and I apologize in advance.

 

My ex and I have known each other since elementary school and been very good friends since middle or high school. In high school, we dated for a few months. I pursued him, and he eventually "fell" for me. We were madly in love the way teenagers are, but then we broke up. It was messy, and because of that, we only spoke awkwardly every once in a while for the next 5 years.

 

We happen to go to the same college, and one night last year, we ended up at the same party and fell into bed drunkenly after agreeing at the 5-year silence was immature. From there, we began to open up to each other again. A few weeks after this, we had a talk, where I told him that he had to think about what he wanted. The next night, I clarified and told him that he had to think about what he wanted because I was not ready for a relationship (I had just gotten out of an emotionally abusive one) and I did not want to hurt him. He seemed devastated, saying that he had been thinking about a relationship constantly since we began hooking up again. A few months after this, my feelings changed, and we began dating again, slowly.

 

A week ago, after 6 months, he broke up with me. I knew there were problems, as sometimes I would ask him, "Do you love me?" and he would not answer. But I did not want to crowd him or corner him into answering me. When he broke up with me, he said, "I don't love you," and after a few questions from me, he basically agreed that he wouldn't ever be in love with me. We agreed that neither of us did anything harmful to the relationship.

 

I know what I want with him: a relationship. I was not in love with him yet, but I saw great potential in him to be "the one." He does not seem to know what he wants. This is a part of his personality, the indecisiveness. I do not know if I can just be friends with him, even though we were great friends as children. I am just too attracted to him, as he is to me. During that 5-year break, if we ran into each other, my friends always noticed him checking me out, and I caught him a few times also. The sexual attraction is too strong, I think, for even a good friendship.

 

My question is, should I try to win him back? This is our last year in college, and we will likely end up in different cities after graduation, although ending up in the same city is possible. He has been a constant in my life. He is a great guy. But he loves me only as a friend, and at this point in life, he does not see being in love with me as a possibility. If I try to win him back, I would do it slowly, and hopefully, as a by-product, our friendship will be helped. But ultimately, I would want him back. Is this worth it?

 

I know I am young and I haven't had a lot of experience, but this guy means a lot to me, and maybe he's just too young and immature to be in love, but this is really my last year to make things happen for us unless we miraculously end up in the same city. He will move on to grad school for the two years following graduation, and I will be off doing something in one place for the next four years, probably.