upto_here Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 i was just wondering that after the long suspicious of the H affair then one day his ow or female friend came up to see you and told you about the affair will you believe her? or you will trust your H ? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 I take it you are pondering telling your exMM's wife about you? Or asking a friend to do this for you? Just wondering, but what purpose will this serve for you? To get him back, to punish him, make him suffer? In hopes his wife will give him the boot? Link to post Share on other sites
annabelle75 Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Edit: didn't realize that the OP was the OW. oops. She's going to doubt you and want proof of her own as she should. If you were in her situation would you believe you were being completely honest with her? Your agenda in telling her will be in question. What is your agenda? Do you want her to kick him out? Link to post Share on other sites
Author upto_here Posted August 31, 2007 Author Share Posted August 31, 2007 I take it you are pondering telling your exMM's wife about you? Or asking a friend to do this for you? Just wondering, but what purpose will this serve for you? To get him back, to punish him, make him suffer? In hopes his wife will give him the boot? To be honest with you no offense but i am also marriage i am angry with him that after i felt pregnant and get termination all the thing he said is lie ...i understand in 1 point cause i also a wife myself...i have come clean to my H because i can't live a lie and i think my H deserved to know the truth... whatever the outcome i have to live with it...but on the other hand the exmm lied his way out both me and his w just to saved his own ass and now my H had to suffered on his own....i knew its my false also and i had to solve it but that exmm told his w that i am the trouble ...before that we<me and him> agreed that we will come clean then he didn't now he threw me under the bus....millions times and yes i told his w myself which i always said to myself i will never do that but after the back stabbing i am furious that how can he did this after what we been tru the A had to end anyway as we agreed but as i did my part he didn't ....if i really wanted to tell his w i should have done it when im still pregnant!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author upto_here Posted August 31, 2007 Author Share Posted August 31, 2007 Edit: didn't realize that the OP was the OW. oops. She's going to doubt you and want proof of her own as she should. If you were in her situation would you believe you were being completely honest with her? Your agenda in telling her will be in question. What is your agenda? Do you want her to kick him out? yes she said she wanted proof she didn't believe me cause the exmm got to her before me ..i said i will give her proof and asked me to go in the house with her and i rejected her idea...whats the point !!! she already believe her H ,i am a W myself i put myself in her shoes ,i would do the same if i wanted to believe my H ..if you have read my tread before you would have known my situation....i never wanted to hurt anyone ....apart from myself...and him i just wanted him to be honest with his w as we agreed how we should end the R and moved on with our life but he's a back stabbing...a coward one that i am furious about.... the truth is yes i wanted him to suffer ...i don't know what she will do or did ...but only thing that i wanted is that i had to gone tru the abortion which he said he will take the responsibility now that i told my H about the A and the termination ...we are suffering ...although we try to work out our M at the same time but looking at my H to be like this i am hurt so much ...i don't know who to blame again ...apart from myself by believed of everything the exmm said... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 You can't control what happens with his wife...You chose to tell your H, he chickened out. Another choice made... You both choose to cheat on your spouses, and with that being said, once the A was over, he handled it the way he wanted to..Sure, he chickened out confessing to his wife, you didn't and now you and your H are fixing your marriage (which is good) so maybe you need to focus on the recovery instead of making the exMM suffer. His marriage, his choice - Don't get involved. (Go read AP's thread on telling the wife or not.) Link to post Share on other sites
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