panzer6 Posted September 1, 2007 Share Posted September 1, 2007 I have been seeing a woman off and on for the last 3 yrs. The relationship hasn't been easy but I do love her and her 2 sons very much. Recently we got back together and things have been pretty good. A month ago she found out that she has to leave her house because her landlord needs to live there. Needless to say she is between a rock and a hard place. Rental homes here are very expensive and she can't afford a place on her own because it will cost much more than she is paying for her current place. Her and I talked about us living together and although I love them very much I was kind of hesitant about the idea. She then blurted out that she was going to live with another guy she had been seeing. This threw me for a loop to put it mildly. As it turns out this other guy's family is dead set against the idea so he had to decline. She wants to live with me but I feel that she was treating me as an option, not a priority. Last night she told me that it isn't a good idea for us to see each other anymore because she feels that it is misleading her kids. Her youngest son called me dad the other day and she said it made her feel that I was getting too close to them and the fact that I won't live with them makes her want to push me away. I love them very much but I don't really know what to do. Part of me wants to live with them, the other is afraid to. She wants someone to share her life with and she can't do it alone anymore. I'm still angry about the other guy, I feel she shouldnt have even considered living with him because her and I were seeing each other. I'm very upset about this situation and I would really like some feedback. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
sneak Posted September 4, 2007 Share Posted September 4, 2007 I'm sorry for what you're going through man.. But if i were you i would try my best to move on. As much as it sucks she saw you as second that's just shows how little she really cares. You deserve a woman that puts you first we all do. And really look at her character, she doesn't really care what she's doing to you, she just sees you as a place to stay. You need to really ask yourself do i really want to be with her? really? Her mind set is a selfish one anyone anyone with her will be miserable, even if she falls madly in love with you, her character is still one of "it all about me" and you can never find happiness with a person with that out look. If you really love her and her kids i would let her go, because if you're going to have anything special with her she has to really get hurt in life and realize how much she love you! this is only way that i can see. good luck man, and remember you do deserve to be number one! don't forget that! Link to post Share on other sites
tinke Posted September 4, 2007 Share Posted September 4, 2007 UGH! what a dimemna you're in. first, think long and hard about the fact that she was seeing someone else without your knowledge. aside from hurt pride, dishonesty, she also put you in potential danger of STDs. i can understand the maternal flow to provide shelter for her children, but...then say that. sure sounds gutsy to ask to live with you only after the other had turned her down. the other's family may have saved him much discord...smart! can you forgive her, trust her again, love her? does she love you? it's a huge step to let her move in, particularly after her announcement. it would be very difficult to move forward, would you feel resentment? don't allow her in out of pity or obligation. remember, she selected elsewhere. your living routine would drastically change, particularly with children. Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted September 4, 2007 Share Posted September 4, 2007 I would dump her. Clearly she's only capable of thinking about herself. You was dating her then she blurts out she's been seeing someone else behind your back? What kind of person does that, and then she has the nerve to shack up with you only because the other man declined? Are you some kind of doormat? Dump her!!! She isnt wife material that's for sure. What the hell are you getting out of the relationship. I would bounce out of therr asap especially if the kids arent mine. I'm sorry but I myself as a man couldnt tolerate such blatant disrespect! Neither should u! man up! as gunny would say! Link to post Share on other sites
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