Promiscuous, flirty women - where do you draw the line?

[Yellowboy]

Where do you personally draw a line when it comes to flirty, promoiscuous women? More importantly, what do you think of them, would you consider dating them?

 

Personally, I just find it hard to even consider dating someone who is very touchy-touch with a lot of guys. I don't mean like just hugs, but like pushing their face against yours, kissing on cheek, holding hands or wanting to be carried by you, etc. I tend to look at them as flirty, promiscuous women who are looking for a casual relationship or even a one-night stand. Attention whores so to speak. It's even more sickening when the girl is Asian and ONLY does it with white guys. Ugh.

 

The only redeeming thing is, when you talk to them, they are kinda normal. Even then, it's a huge turn off for me for them to act like that. I immediately write them off. I used to be worse and not talk to them, but I am being more sociable now so I try to talk to them but not get involved in their flirtatous acts.

 

So what do you guys think? Am I being too hard on these women, am I being judgemental? Or is my reaction normal?

[2old4this]

It's even more sickening when the girl is Asian and ONLY does it with white guys. Ugh.

Kind of racist, no?

[Yellowboy]

Kind of racist, no?

 

Uh....me, or her?

 

Because yeah, she would be kinda racist, no? Why not do it the Asian guys in the crowd? She exclusively does it with just white guys.

[2old4this]

Uh....me, or her?

 

Because yeah, she would be kinda racist, no? Why not do it the Asian guys in the crowd? She exclusively does it with just white guys.

Uh...you.

 

And thank you for definitively answering my question.

[Cobra_X30]

Uh....me, or her?

 

Because yeah, she would be kinda racist, no? Why not do it the Asian guys in the crowd? She exclusively does it with just white guys.

 

Her choice... I wouldnt call it racist... just dumb.

[2old4this]

Her choice... I wouldnt call it racist... just dumb.

Please re-read...she was not the target of the "racist" comment.

 

I am curious, exactly what makes her behavior "dumb"?

[birdie]

Where do you personally draw a line when it comes to flirty, promoiscuous women? More importantly, what do you think of them, would you consider dating them?

 

Personally, I just find it hard to even consider dating someone who is very touchy-touch with a lot of guys. I don't mean like just hugs, but like pushing their face against yours, kissing on cheek, holding hands or wanting to be carried by you, etc. I tend to look at them as flirty, promiscuous women who are looking for a casual relationship or even a one-night stand. Attention whores so to speak. It's even more sickening when the girl is Asian and ONLY does it with white guys. Ugh.

 

The only redeeming thing is, when you talk to them, they are kinda normal. Even then, it's a huge turn off for me for them to act like that. I immediately write them off. I used to be worse and not talk to them, but I am being more sociable now so I try to talk to them but not get involved in their flirtatous acts.

 

So what do you guys think? Am I being too hard on these women, am I being judgemental? Or is my reaction normal?

 

they just do it because they are young and they think every Tom, Dick and Harry has to be into them.

 

it is immature behaviour, if it bothers you then talk to girls that are a bit more confident and modest (in this sense)

[stillafool]

Maybe the Asian girl only flirts with the white guys is because they are her type and Asian men aren't. It's okay, don't get upset everyone has their type. If you don't know her why do you care? Just ignore her.

[Cobra_X30]

Please re-read...she was not the target of the "racist" comment.

 

I am curious, exactly what makes her behavior "dumb"?

 

I wasnt quoting you!

 

The fact that she wont flirt with asian guys... thats dumb because she is limiting herself and her dating pool based on shallow physical characteristics.

[a4a]

I wasnt quoting you!

 

The fact that she wont flirt with asian guys... thats dumb because she is limiting herself and her dating pool based on shallow physical characteristics.

 

Yeah like when lesbians only hit on women...... limiting their dating pool too!

 

sheesh.... :lmao:

 

I highly doubt you will ever see me hitting red heads either. Just not my thang.

[Yellowboy]

they just do it because they are young and they think every Tom, Dick and Harry has to be into them.

 

it is immature behaviour, if it bothers you then talk to girls that are a bit more confident and modest (in this sense)

 

Yeah I figure it is being immature but thought there were other things behind their actions.

 

I apologize if that came off as a racist comment, but I've met some Asian girls who admit they only date Caucasian guys simply for their looks (i.e. "Oh he's like a BMW as opposed to a Toyota." Yeah she said that.). I am Asian-American and there were times they just simply ignore me among my circle of friends simply because of my appearance. Of course, personality and other things would come in play, but there were some situations where my white friend would be piss drunk and acting really obnoxious around women and I'm more of a cool, calm guy. We all engage in the same amount of conversation, the same topic, and the girl would just always look at this drunken obnoxious guy and flirt with him. I'm like man, that's shallow. I don't think I was being boring at all. I dunno if "racist" was the right word, but that just didn't feel good suffice to say.

 

I'm not against multi-racial relationships, I have friends who are happily married (i.e. white guy/Asian girl) and their relationship wasn't based on appearances and such, so it's good. On the opposite end, I also know friends who got involved or married simply by the above example, and those usually don't turn out well. So yeah I guess your actions do come back biting your arse...but I just sometimes find it some frustrating to be in this type of situations. I guess I should find a new circle of friends or something...

[pollita26]

If u don't feel comfortable talking to sluts, dear, i dont' feel comfortable talking to players.,., i get ur point and you don't have to be nice to that kind of people if u dont feel it....

[Cobra_X30]

Yeah like when lesbians only hit on women...... limiting their dating pool too!

 

sheesh.... :lmao:

 

I highly doubt you will ever see me hitting red heads either. Just not my thang.

 

Ah... lesbians... thats a slightly different story.... ummm.... yeah.... What was I saying again. Hmmm... you got my mind wandering, kind of hard to make a point now.

 

Oh, I remember... Limiting your possibilities based on physical characteristics is dumb, and shallow. Do you feel that you cant be attracted to redheads? Based on what?

[Yamaha]

Many times flirty people are not really interested in the people they are flirting with but they just like to flirt for attention. If you came onto them and took their flirting serious they would back off and let you know they don't see you that way. It is a game.

[DOA]

Only idiots go for the flirty ones.

 

Seriously, the game can only be played for so long and the hot facade fade into slut when you realise you're her 100th notch on her belt.

 

Be grateful you're into more respectful girls. They're the keepers in the end.

[MrsHellnoFire]

Ah... lesbians... thats a slightly different story.... ummm.... yeah.... What was I saying again. Hmmm... you got my mind wandering, kind of hard to make a point now.

 

Oh, I remember... Limiting your possibilities based on physical characteristics is dumb, and shallow. Do you feel that you cant be attracted to redheads? Based on what?

 

Are you telling me you date people you are UNATTRACTED to? It might be shallow and "dumb" but most people in society start a relationship with whom they are PHYSICALLY attracted to. It's quite conceivable that a person is not drawn or attracted to a certain race or characteristics on a person.. afterall everyone has different tastes.

[lindya]

...the girl would just always look at this drunken obnoxious guy and flirt with him. I'm like man, that's shallow. I don't think I was being boring at all.

 

Women often flirt with men like that in the same way that men flirt with women who give off very overt sexual signals. Follow a simple formula, and the chances are that those people will "connect" with you. On a superficial basis, at least. It's easy, and the easy option is the most attractive one when people are feeling lazy and in desire of a sure thing.

 

Quieter, more reserved people are harder to read...so it's less clear for others to know what flirting "formula" would be welcomed by them. People will still do a mating dance of sorts around those quieter people, but it tends to be more subtle and less certain than the mating dances that are performed around louder, more evidently attention-seeking (occasionally to the point of being obnoxious) individuals.

[norajane]

Attention whores so to speak.

 

Yes, that's what they are. They have a bottomless well of need for attention and validation from the opposite sex. Goes for men, too, by the way.

 

If you see that a person is an attention whore, best to stay away because your attention won't ever be enough for that person.

 

But...you're attracted, aren't you? And disappointed that she's not acting that way with you? Otherwise, you wouldn't care and wouldn't be posting, right?

 

You say you're a quiet guy - look around and SEE the quiet girls. You're likely to have much more in common, and are likely to find someone who would be happy to have your attention without constantly trying to attract more.

[lonely_blue]

Generaly im a quiet person, but can be quite outgoing. A new girl started working with me, she was outgoing and took an instant like to me. I was on a very confident streek and after about a week we were dating. After I started going out with her I realised she was a very flirty person. She had told me one her previous bf had accuesed her of going doing things that she hadnt done (going after other men). She was very flirty with all men and at first i was jelouse, but grew to new that she wouldnt do anything. and it did become less. and because of her previous bf i didnt no how to approach it.

 

Anyway we split up after a year. while i was away it became evident that she had been flirting with someone else. She broke up with me and 'milked' the attention for all she could get, luckily everyone was wise to this, but even so the one person she was flirting with, while i was away, still entertained her. When she left our work place she milked that aswell for all the attention she could get. All she wanted was attention, attention, and attention, and looking back over our relationship many things she did were only done if there was some advantage for her.

 

yes you first start dating its great, but when you start to settle down she will get bored cos she just wants more and more attention. I never thought i would go out with someone like that. but did and have learnt. all the signs were there when she spoke about her ex's, that she will get bored,,, but your so in love you ignore it. thats my oppinion from my experience.

[Yellowboy]

Yes, that's what they are. They have a bottomless well of need for attention and validation from the opposite sex. Goes for men, too, by the way.

 

If you see that a person is an attention whore, best to stay away because your attention won't ever be enough for that person.

 

But...you're attracted, aren't you? And disappointed that she's not acting that way with you? Otherwise, you wouldn't care and wouldn't be posting, right?

 

You say you're a quiet guy - look around and SEE the quiet girls. You're likely to have much more in common, and are likely to find someone who would be happy to have your attention without constantly trying to attract more.

 

I probably wrote the original post in the wrong order. I went through something similar to what lonely_blue mentioned. I steer clearly at women who are obviously flirty from the start up. I don't go near those type no matter how hot they look.

 

For me it was this girl who seemed normal, and later on, when she's with a larger group with my friends, she starts flirting with just the white guys. That's when a red flag came up for me, and I tried to ignore that flaw because otherwise she was a normal person. But in the end, that flaw along was enough to ruin everything...she felt "we weren't for each other" and ends up dating a buncha white guys instead (yes, one after the other...) I imagine that's just the girl BBD-ing...and it was an unfortunate event for me.

 

Oh I go for the quiet ones too. Through conversations with this one particular quiet girl, I learned that she was actually a somewhat depressive person, and stalks her dates...so yeah, quiet doesn't mean they're necessarily good girls either

[halfarock]

For me it was this girl who seemed normal, and later on, when she's with a larger group with my friends, she starts flirting with just the white guys. That's when a red flag came up for me, and I tried to ignore that flaw because otherwise she was a normal person.

Through this whole thread, it seems to me that your problem isn’t that this girl flirts, and not even that she flirts with only white guys. It seems that, you being of Asian decent got snubbed by an Asian girl who prefers white guys. I’m sure what she has done wrong is to not like you. Just because she’s not into you and probably never will be is not a flaw on her part. It also seems that you are only posting here because you are fishing for someone to tell you that yes you are in the right and the girl is in the wrong. Just get over it.

[Yellowboy]

Through this whole thread, it seems to me that your problem isn’t that this girl flirts, and not even that she flirts with only white guys. It seems that, you being of Asian decent got snubbed by an Asian girl who prefers white guys. I’m sure what she has done wrong is to not like you. Just because she’s not into you and probably never will be is not a flaw on her part. It also seems that you are only posting here because you are fishing for someone to tell you that yes you are in the right and the girl is in the wrong. Just get over it.

 

Ok one last time...because this is not just about that one girl. I've met other girls that do the same, so you're going to say they are all just not into me, and this is not some sort of trend I am seeing in the women I have been around with?

 

Anyhow, I know what not to do with these type of women, but I just wanted an insight on this...unfortunately I didn't find the answer I was looking for (other than "she's not into you man")...but thanks anyhow everyone. I'll just seal this case closed.