wondering1 Posted September 12, 2007 Share Posted September 12, 2007 Hi. I'm a high school senior and I've been in love with this guy for a good while (say.. halfway through sophomore year.. it's pretty pathetic). The problem is that we don't really talk. In fact, we've never really talked. I'm not sure he knows I exist. He might. We were in a class together sophomore year, which is how I met him. I overheard one of his conversations once and realized we liked the same kind of music. From then, I listened to him when he talked and realized he was smart, had a great sense of humor, and was pretty much everything I was looking for. We're in different social circles (he's friends with a lot of *******s; i'm friends with a lot of the more conservative kids). And while everyone says it shouldn't matter, it does. We have a lot in common Since we're seniors, I want to tell him before the school year is over because I know I'll regret it if I don't. I don't know how he'll take it and I kind of want to prepare myself for the worst, just in case. So, my question is, how should I approach him? I want to do this with the least embarrassment possible, so hopefully when he's alone.. but I'm not sure what to say. I know girls tend to over dramatize stuff and I don't want to be like that, but yeah. Any advice would be great. Link to post Share on other sites
Mahatma Posted September 12, 2007 Share Posted September 12, 2007 Whatever you are feeling is not love, I promise. Love comes when you really KNOW the person. I hope you have not heard enough to know everything about him...bc that would be a bit strange haha, but honestly, thats a hard situation. I am also a senior in highschool and it is basically like the class system in other countries. It is SO hard to move out of your social circle and into someone elses. However, since you are a senior, make a move and if you are embarassed, you wont have to live with it very long. My main word of advice is to not rush things. If you approach him or he approaches you, remember this is his first knowledge of you. You may know alot about him and have feelings for him, but he does not know you yet. Best of luck. If he's not willing to date out of his little circle, he's not worth your time anyways. Link to post Share on other sites
StaringContest Posted September 12, 2007 Share Posted September 12, 2007 Start a convo with him when he's alone. Just say "hi". Make small talk, asking him where he's going for college or whatever. Keep things light and flirty. If he keeps the convo up by asking about you, eventually move onto asking what he's doing for the summer. Try to work a "we should hang out" in there. If he's interested, he'll agree and ask for your number, email address, or some way to contact you. If he doesn't, assume he's not interested, but stay friendly. Whether he asks for your number or not, chat a little more then make your exit. Whatever you do, DON'T tell him you love him. You'll send him running, possibly literally, away from you. Like Mahatma said, you don't love him. You don't know him well enough to love him. You can't love a person you've never really talked to. You love the person you've made him out to be. You have a crush on him. No harm in that as long as you recognize it for what it is. Your goal here should be to get to know him better to find out if he's 1-interested in you and 2-anything like the guy you made him out to be. Link to post Share on other sites
ftheunion Posted September 13, 2007 Share Posted September 13, 2007 Not sure how, but if you talk to him, just pull this simple method. After you chat small talk for a while, and there is a period of silence say: "Hey, do you mind if I tell you something?" Then tell him you liked him since sophmore year, and that he is cute or adorable. He might not meet eyecontact. I dunno what I'd do if a chick did that to me. It might catch him off gaurd, but that is always what happens in a situation like yours. It is much easier than a guy approaching a girl. Trust me on that. I may or may not have used this technique before, and it may or may not have been successful.......but you'll be glad you did this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author wondering1 Posted September 13, 2007 Author Share Posted September 13, 2007 Hey. Thanks for the advice. Whatever you do, DON'T tell him you love him. You'll send him running, possibly literally, away from you. Like Mahatma said, you don't love him. You don't know him well enough to love him. You can't love a person you've never really talked to. You love the person you've made him out to be. I guess when I said "love", I used too strong of a word. Because I know you can't actually LOVE someone you don't have a close relationship with. I guess what I meant was that I have a strong attraction to him and would like to pursue things, if he were willing. And I know telling him I was in love with him, point blank, would be a bit strong. I was thinking more like saying that I think he's cool and tell him why and say that I've kind of liked him for awhile. Nothing too strong. Does that sound all right? ftheunion, thanks a lot. My whole problem is that I don't want to look back on this next year or in five years and regret it. I figure, if I'm not successful, ah well. Best of luck to him, at least I tried. And if I am, well, then that would be great. The guy isn't all that popular with chicks. I'm pretty sure he's never had a girlfriend and one of his chick friend's told me he'd never even kissed a girl. So hopefully I won't freak him out or anything. Link to post Share on other sites
ftheunion Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 Sure thing. I might of told this girl I liked her on grad night using that method. I might be glad I did it, even though I might feel a constant tug on the heart strings. If you don't wanna lay it on heavy thats fine, but if you're not clear and tell im exactly as you feel, then he'll never know. If you give him a hug when parting, and steal a kiss on the cheek, your message will be pretty clear. It is your choice though. It's a tough business, I still have those feelings, and I resent it. The Irony/emotion won't ever leave me, but I'm done, stick a fork in me, cause high school is over, and she is still there.........Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
glittergurl Posted September 30, 2007 Share Posted September 30, 2007 Girl, don't tell him! It's very likely he hasn't even even looked at you as friend material yet. The best way to handle this situation is the slowly get to know him. Talk to him. You mentioned you have similar tastes in music ... mention it to him. Maybe you two can even go to a concert together? Whatever the case, make sure you two get to know each other first. And if you get along well enough, you might stay in touch after graduation and then who knows ... But I can tell you; if you've never talked to him before, nothing good can come out of a love confession now. It will be awkward for him and then it will be over. Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted September 30, 2007 Share Posted September 30, 2007 hmmm well you could just steal a kiss, grab his head and plant when on the lips... probably your best bet... or just hand him your number smile and say call me... If hes anything like I was in HS he'll find a way to screw it up... are you fatt? Link to post Share on other sites
Magnatolia Posted September 30, 2007 Share Posted September 30, 2007 Glittergurl's advice is almost perfect except I think you mentioned that the year is almost over. So don't take things too slowly. But I wouldn't suggest telling him you've liked him for a while. Depending how you say it might come across as obsessive/stalkerish, like you've been watching him from a distance etc. Just start a conversation with him. Tell him you heard he liked x music and that you like them too. Then go from there. Link to post Share on other sites
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