Jump to content

I have breast cancer


Recommended Posts

LB, everyone keeps saying how amazing you are (and I agree), but I just wanted to acknowledge your exH too. He's pretty damn amazing himself to stick by you like he has. He seems to be a man amoungst boys in your life. You can tell him I said so.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

exH is truly an asset in my life. He and I didn't make it as H and W, but to be honest we are closer now than we ever have been. We enjoy each other's company and spend a good deal of time together. Even thought the H/W door may be closed, we will always have a bond of a different sort for the rest of our days.

 

He takes good care of me, and me of him. We look out for each other. I guess that's what family does! :)

 

I feel lucky to still have him in my life.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

Have you any indication of how the next chemo session is likely to leave you feeling? So far, has it been better or worse than you predicted?

 

I'm dreading the next one.

 

My nurse during this last chemo told me that it was cumulative and would get worse with each treatment. The last couple of ones are supposed to be really bad. Dazed gave me the skinny on it already, so I was expecting it to be bad. And it was. The next one will be too. At least the one on New Years Eve will be halfway over. I am so looking forward to the chemo part being over. The surgery won't be so bad, and the radiation isn't supposed to be so bad either - pretty much the same in that they get a little worse with each treatment but nothing so bad as chemo. I am worried about the radiation burns, but even that won't be as bad as the daily life with chemo and Neupogen shots.

Link to post
Share on other sites

This really is the ultra testing stuff you're going through right now.

 

Have you explored hypnotherapy at all, just as an additional coping mechanism? I had a session lately just as a general "increase your motivation" thing...and it left me feeling more relaxed and positive than I've felt in ages. I know there are limits to what positive thinking can do in terms of pain control...but anything that helps you to relax, even if just a little bit, has got to be worth a try right now?

Link to post
Share on other sites
AriaIncognito

LB -

 

I just wanted to send some vibes out to you today. You are such an amazing person and one to be admired. I've been following your story and I can't imagine where you draw the strength, and the sense of humor, in this difficult time.

 

I look forward to reading about your recovery and being in remission. You will definitely be a cancer survivor.

 

:love::love::love: to you!

Link to post
Share on other sites
Heh... I have to type each post a couple of times and proofread them afterward. :laugh: Some of the stuff I type makes no sense.

 

On a different note, today is a sick day. Its like clockwork. The third day, I get really sick. This time I have a much stronger medication for that. So, now I feel queasy, but I'm not actually throwing up. Yet, anyway. :(:sick:

 

At least it doesn't last too long. Plus I have these things called "Queasy Pops" - lollipops that have stuff in them to help with the nausea. I found them the other day in a small pharmacy over here next to where exH is living (and where I'm staying this week). Those things are awesome. They make "Preggie Pops" too, for pregnancy nausea.

 

I should have those pictures today. I love Photobooth! I laugh and laugh over some of the pictures we come up with.

Well I have to proofread, too, so what's MY excuse?! At least you have a good one:) Too bad they didn't have those Preggie Pops when I was preggie:mad:

Link to post
Share on other sites

LB, you look adorable in your profile pic.

 

Just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas and hope that you are feeling better and are able to enjoy the day!

Link to post
Share on other sites

LB... I really want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a quick recovery... I wish you the best for 2008!

 

Take care... keep posting.. I enjoy reading you...

 

I am getting ready to pick up my son and drive to my daughter's place to see my little treasure.

 

Have fun everyone!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

Hope everyone had a good Xmas! I did. I'm glad that I was feeling ok for the holidays.

 

I have the next treatment on New Years Eve. Can't say I'm looking forward to it. :( At least that will be the halfway point for the chemo. Almost there...

 

I had the most awesome thing happen this weekend. I got a call from work, and my manager said that I had to come in and sign some paperwork relating to my medical leave before Sunday. Well, I was out of town and not expecting to come back until Monday so I asked if they could fax the paperwork to the nearest store where I was staying and I would sign it there. The manager said no - that I had to sign in the presence of a manager according to the district manager. :eek: I was thinking WTF?! Are they going to fire me? They said they would extend the deadline to Monday since I was coming back to town anyway that morning.

 

So I drove back Monday morning with a crawling in the pit of my stomach wondering what sort of paperwork I would have to sign that day. I walk into the store and I know something is up. Everyone is acting funny. One guy who is a friend of mine even looked right past me as he walked by me to help a customer. :eek: By this time I am thinking... great, I got the axe and everyone knows. I get into the office, and all the managers crowd around me and one of them says...

 

We lied. We don't have paperwork. And they handed me an envelope. Inside was a substantial amount of cash and a large gift card for Toys R Us for my daughter. I was like... :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: and I just cried. So did a couple of the managers. They said that they wanted me to come in before Xmas so that I would be able to have a good Xmas and they wanted my daughter to have one too! The employees did a giftwrap donation thing amongst themselves to raise money for me. Everyone there put something in. I was so touched. I mean really blown away. I had no idea that was coming. Those guys are awesome, and I've been working there for more than ten years for a reason. They are like family to me. When I walked out, other employees (even the stern faced one) hugged me and there were teary eyes all around. It was really, really, really, awesome. The best any work place has ever done for me.

 

I would have to say it was the most touching gift I got this year.

Link to post
Share on other sites

That is awesome. It sounds like you work with some great people. I am happy that some good things happened for you today.

 

My personal gut feeling is that this will all turn out good for you.

Link to post
Share on other sites

LB,

I just dropped in to wish you a happy holiday and after reading your last post I feel so blessed. It always happens...I come to offer some kind of wish on your thread and I get more out of it! People can be really great, can't they? I'm happy your co-workers did that for you. What a warm feeling. Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year, LB.

Link to post
Share on other sites
KenzieAbsolutely
Hope tomorrow goes well LB.

 

You're in my thoughts and we're all sending you cyber hugs and support for tomorrow.

 

i think that goes for all of us. :) good luck.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

Thank you all. I would by lying if I said I wasn't dreading it. Well, not the actual chemo procedure. That isn't so bad. They just hook me up and I sleep through it mostly. exH and our D will be there with me tomorrow. exH's mother works there at the hospital too, so she'll be dropping in too. I'll have no shortage of people there with me.

 

Its the side effects that I'm dreading. The explosive sickness, the aching bones, all that good stuff. :mad:

 

*sigh* At least it doesn't last but for a few days, and then I'm feeling ok. But when I feel bad, I feel REALLY bad. Oh well. At least this is the halfway point for the chemo! :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
That is awesome. It sounds like you work with some great people. I am happy that some good things happened for you today.

 

My personal gut feeling is that this will all turn out good for you.

 

I agree with James in that I think things will only get better for you - what a wonderful surprise from a bunch of great people :D

Link to post
Share on other sites
DazedandConfused66

LB, just read about your holiday surprise from your work....what an awesome gesture! I hope you managed to eek out a wonderful Christmas, especially in your heart.

 

Good luck with the "hump" chemo session.....the last one will be here before you know it.

 

Happy New Year....and I do mean Happy. Make a New Years' resolution to kick this. It'll happen.

Link to post
Share on other sites
AriaIncognito

What a great set of coworkers you've got! That's great.

 

I hope you're feeling decent today, I know it's not probable, but it's certainly possible.

 

I hope you're feeling strong soon, and you will definitely kick this things a$$ in 2008!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

Last night was really bad. I was hella sick. :sick: Today isn't so bad. I just ate some fruit and a bagel and am holding it down well. Tomorrow I know I will be sick. The third day after chemo I am usually sick all day and most of the night. Today, though... today is ok.

 

I look really funny this time around. My face looks sunburned and its a tad swollen. I look like I fell asleep at the beach or something. :o

 

2008 is my year to finish killing this cancer. And I aim to do it, too.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Last night was really bad. I was hella sick. :sick: Today isn't so bad. I just ate some fruit and a bagel and am holding it down well. Tomorrow I know I will be sick. The third day after chemo I am usually sick all day and most of the night. Today, though... today is ok.

 

I look really funny this time around. My face looks sunburned and its a tad swollen. I look like I fell asleep at the beach or something. :o

 

2008 is my year to finish killing this cancer. And I aim to do it, too.

 

 

Keep up your good spirit... YOU WILL kill this bastard this year, don't worry... we'll send you ALL our best vibes...

 

You are strong woman! You'll win!!! :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...

LB, I've just noticed it's been well over a week since you last updated...Hope you're hanging in okay..

 

And, Dazed, how are things with your wife?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
LucreziaBorgia

I have been hanging in there. This past round was really bad, and I'm dreading the one coming up on the 22nd. :( Been very down about it, actually.

 

At least it will be the 4th one. Only two more after that.

 

Nothing new really. Just increasingly worse symptoms each time. I sleep a lot more now. My taste has changed. I can't eat any meat now - the idea of meat makes me sick. Coffee (once my lifeblood) makes me sick. It reminds me of food aversions I had when I was pregnant. :sick:

 

I am down to fruits and vegetables - mostly raw, but sometimes cooked. I can eat pasta, rice, grains and cereals but I find that mostly I just want fresh fruit. Any kind will do. I'm partial to watermelon. :p

 

I'm hoping to hear an update from Dazed too. I hope he, his wife and his family are doing well.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...