BlueSoul Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 ....I don't know how to make one. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BlueSoul Posted September 18, 2007 Author Share Posted September 18, 2007 Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 Yes, are you listening? Okay, seriously....first some questions...Why can't you make friends? What happens when you talk with strangers? What is there about you that makes you think that you cannot be a good friend? Have you had no friends? Or have you lost all of the friends you had? Advice...get confidence in yourself. How? Glad you asked. Practice being a friend. Sounds dumb. When you are out at the mall or wherever, smile and say hi to people. See how they respond. Notice that a smile makes people smile back. Simple procedure. Next, read a book or two on making friends. Seriously, this may help. And, begin changing those things about you that you think get in the way of you being a friend. Most of the time we don't need to change ourselves...we simply need to change our attitude. Don't believe me? Okay. Think of the comediens on TV or the actors...are the only good ones handsome and skinny? Can we say Kevin James? No, it is the personality of the actor...even if it is acting that attracts you to that person. So, you can do that, too. But I don't have the confidence to do that! Okay, begin with little steps. The mall trick will help. Then begin simply being a friend. Maybe a book can help you with a description, but the biggest reason that people like someone for a friend is his or her ability to listen and be supportive. Simple but true. What attracted girls to me most of the time? I would like to say looks and money , but nope....I was always told and still am that I can listen and have a kind face. Okay, I take what I can get. And I am not bragging, this is from experience and feedback. This builds confidence in one's abilities. So, be a friend. Be a listener. Be confident and be forgetful of yourself. Simple cliches that work. Link to post Share on other sites
Cutey Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 Yes, what james said. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BlueSoul Posted September 18, 2007 Author Share Posted September 18, 2007 Every time I act like that in making new friends, they just don't seemed reflective of my positive attitude, and act all wooden about it. I was (and still am) so confused about this, I did everything that is easy task to extreme extroverts in making friends, but nothing worked. What's going on? Am I a bad luck charm or something? How and where can I find confidence? Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 What do you enjoy doing? What are your interests? Finding people who like the same things as you is a good way to make friends. Take a class, join a sports team or a book club, I know these all sound really naff, but it really is a good way to get to know like minded people. Link to post Share on other sites
This_Too_Shall_Pass Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 Ah, it's you, Blue Soul. You've got good people here giving you advice, but I'll just re-state what I already know, so they can know your situation better. Part of your confidence issue was your height. You feel you're too short, and that's stopping you from making friends. I already addressed that issue in another thread, but you might feel like getting a second opinion. Another problem is that everyone keeps breaking off the friendships that they have with you. Even your best friends. And nobody seems to come forward and want to be your friend. I hope I didn't state anything wrong here. Okay folks, the ball is back in your court. Help Blue Soul. Link to post Share on other sites
love necessity Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 Awww..I will be your friend!=)...... BlueSoul: I know exactly what you mean about not being able to meet people... The truth is, is that you won't have a connection w/ everyone, so if you don't befriend everyone you happen to have a conversation w/, don't beat yourself up about it... Move on and try again...Each time you try, you will learn something new about yourself and about the people around you.... You just have to keep on trying.... Maybe you are not looking in the right spots? I don't know if you got to school, but to me, school is a great place to make new friends... You've just got to give yourself and other people a chance...Also, one thing I've noticed about people is that they don't like it when someone is trying to come on too strong... There are so many people out there who probably don't have many friends either, so you are not the only one... As you get older, you start a family and start to lose time for the friends you once had and people grow apart...It's just natural... Get out there and maybe join a group or a club, that specializes in something you enjoy doing... If you're into art, join an art gallery or something...That's a great way too make friends... I think the first step you should take though is to start accepting yourself for you... Start believing in yourself....When you can say that you believe in yourself and mean it, then I think people will flock to you, like feathers of a bird....It's all about confidence and it's all about showing the world that you are worthy... Link to post Share on other sites
Liquinn Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 You gotta be your self, in most cases, not in mine, it works. ~Liquinn. Link to post Share on other sites
XxBacktoBlackXx Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I really believe that the key to success in most situations is confidence. Once you have that, you have it made. Link to post Share on other sites
Liquinn Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Yeah, that is true. Link to post Share on other sites
Clam_chowder Posted September 23, 2007 Share Posted September 23, 2007 The ability to speak to other people is the first step in making friends. Without putting yourself out there, you will reap absolutely no rewards. Start to be outgoing, if you have a job ask your co-workers. I'm sure you have some friends, ask them to introduce you to their friends, so on so forth. Link to post Share on other sites
Liquinn Posted September 24, 2007 Share Posted September 24, 2007 Have faith, and you'll get somewhere xD Link to post Share on other sites
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