xrawxtalentx Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 Ok due to the fact I dont know who checks this site im going to replace actual names with fake names hehe... btw im 24 years old. Ok this this girl at work whom i've known for about 8 months or longer we'll call her "Jane" anyway I've been into her for quite some time and its been building up. We've hung out a few times outside work but always in large parties of 5-15 people. Jane is seeing a guy who she has been seeing for 5 months or so and he's a real jerk, shes always mad at him for something and all he likes to do is talk about himself or make everything revolve around him. Anyway Jane and I have this type of relationship where at work we always talk trash to eachother and pick on eachother and yes we flirt a heck of a lot that i do know, everyone at work thinks we should hook up because of the way we act, we get a long soooo well. The other night jane and I went to a bar with about 5 friends and we all got a lil toasted and drunk, at the end of the night everyone left and me and jane were the last two remaining and we were sitting at the bar for awhile (she left her keys in a friends purse who left for the night, so we waited for her ride) Like i said we got a lil drunk and i told her basically how i felt that i liked her and that I loved spending time like this with her (before i met her and started hanging out with her i never realy went to bars and such) So i told her i was into her, and she told me that she didnt know where her and her current man were going relationship wise she said they could be together awhile or break up on a month. She also told me that I reminded her of her guy friend from California who was her "first" for everything. Then she told me that when i come into work upset or grouchy that it makes her upset and irritated or when I take a day off or call in, she gets upset because that ruins her day and she didnt know why that happened. She said she sees me as one of her best guy friends right now and not to take that the wrong way. So after we talked a bit more about it she asked me how long i liked her and if i liked her before she started dating her current man, to which i told her yes and that ive liked her awhile and its been building up so much that i just had to tell her. She also told me shes the type of girl which she thinks should always be single because her relationships are always short, her current one is her longest one..6 months. So we talked a bit more then her ride showed up, she then asked me if i wanted to go to her house to stay the night because it was closer to the bar and i wouldnt have to drive so far. I declined. She then told me to text her when i got home so she knew i was home okay, which was rather nice. So i feel like im getting a lot of mixed signals and i dont know how to take them, im so confused and dont know what to do. Today was our first day back to work and she acted like nothing was ever said, everything was back to normal and we were back to picking on eachother, playing around, and flirting a bit. She even invited me to go out to her friends birthday party (which the boyfriend will be at) I told her i wasnt sure and to give me a call later. I really like this girl a lot but im afraid im in the friend zone right now and dont know how to get out, should i be patient and wait and see if they break up then try again? Basically do you guys see me stuck as a friend or do you think in the future i might have a chance to move on to a relationship with her. any help or input would be great, i really need it! Thanks Guys! If you have any further questions that I can answer about me and her just ask if you need more info. Link to post Share on other sites
IrishCarBomb Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 she then asked me if i wanted to go to her house to stay the night because it was closer to the bar and i wouldnt have to drive so far. I declined. She then told me to text her when i got home so she knew i was home okay, which was rather nice. So i feel like im getting a lot of mixed signals and i dont know how to take them, im so confused and dont know what to do. This was about as clear of a signal as you're going to get. You pour your feelings out to this girl and then DON'T go home with her? You're in the friend zone... don't expect to get out anytime soon. Link to post Share on other sites
Author xrawxtalentx Posted September 15, 2007 Author Share Posted September 15, 2007 Well I felt like if i accepted It would have seemed like I expected something from her after telling her how i felt plus she was a lil drunk and im not the type to take advantage of that... Link to post Share on other sites
IrishCarBomb Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 Well I felt like if i accepted It would have seemed like I expected something from her after telling her how i felt So? She's not stupid. You told her how you felt, and she invited you over. She probably expected it too. she was a lil drunk and im not the type to take advantage of that... Take advantage?? You've watched too many after-school-specials. In the real world, girls will get SOOO DRUNK (read: have 2 drinks), and be SOOO WASTED (read: pretty much sober), and do stuff SOOO CRAZY (read: easy to use the excuse of alcohol if it goes wrong) when they just are apprehensive about being judged. Frustrated-in-relationship girl with a co-worker that she has a mild chemistry with? Seems to fit the bill. Link to post Share on other sites
Author xrawxtalentx Posted September 16, 2007 Author Share Posted September 16, 2007 lol i like you irish, your a thinking man. She was pretty lit up tho, she had 5 beers, and like 3 shots. I dont think she was smashed but she was close anyway, So do you think if we go out again and her boyfriend isnt there that i might have some sort of chance here? Link to post Share on other sites
IrishCarBomb Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 Yes, but be careful. First of all, she may expect you just want to be friends now. So if you make an advance, it may catch her off guard, but that doesn't mean it's unwelcome. Second, be careful about getting into a relationship with a girl by means of cheating. I'm sure she's great, but if you get together by cheating, don't be so naive to think she may dump you by cheating with a new guy. Link to post Share on other sites
daZed&confUsed005 Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 i think you should take her acting as though everything as normal after wat was said and done as a good sign..atleast she didn't start acting weird around you after knowing how you felt..like irish said play it out nice and try to get out of the friend zone..which i am trying to do at the moment.. our story is very similar..but i just haven't told her how i feel, her boyfriend is a nice guy but i know she will be happier with me, and they 've been seein eachother for 3 months..i want to tell her but keep getting scared of the response i get Link to post Share on other sites
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