Stone Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 I've been seeing this guy for about 2 months, I had a one night stand with him about 8 months ago and we just started talking again in July. Things started out very slow this time, we hung out as friends no kissing ect. untill I finally took the leap.. now that we are becoming more "affectionate" he is confusing the crap out of me!! I attempted to have sex with him last week and he made jokes when he was having any "excitement" and stopped suddenly and said he had to go.... However he called later in the day stating that he really enjoys my company bla bla bla... So Friday he took me to a nice dinner, and drinks then I invited him back to my house and he declined!! I don't understand what the issue is, I am not bad in bed! I've gone thru every sinerio possible and can not come up with a conclusion.. I love his company, his friendship, and want to take things further. I truly care about him as a person with or with out the sex but I don't understand. He is giving signals that he is intrested.. EX taking me out, calling me talking for hours, giving me compliments.. what gives? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 I've been seeing this guy for about 2 months, I had a one night stand with him about 8 months ago and we just started talking again in July. Things started out very slow this time, we hung out as friends no kissing ect. untill I finally took the leap.. now that we are becoming more "affectionate" he is confusing the crap out of me!! I attempted to have sex with him last week and he made jokes when he was having any "excitement" and stopped suddenly and said he had to go.... However he called later in the day stating that he really enjoys my company bla bla bla... So Friday he took me to a nice dinner, and drinks then I invited him back to my house and he declined!! I don't understand what the issue is, I am not bad in bed! I've gone thru every sinerio possible and can not come up with a conclusion.. I love his company, his friendship, and want to take things further. I truly care about him as a person with or with out the sex but I don't understand. He is giving signals that he is intrested.. EX taking me out, calling me talking for hours, giving me compliments.. what gives? From what I read..he only wants to be 'friend' with you ... nothing more. I don't see anything wrong with that... He is just not interested in having sex with you... it's quite 'evident'... so don't sweat it.. just enjoy his company.. he could be a great friend. If this is really bothering you...just be honest about it... ask him... maybe it's your breath... who knows... I have declined having sex with great guys because their breath was such a turn-off... who knows! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Stone Posted September 16, 2007 Author Share Posted September 16, 2007 Thanks for your reply! I appreicate it. He sometimes mentions that there is chemestry between us and is very hot and cold LOL next time I'll make sure I am stocked up on the mints jkjk:lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Author Stone Posted September 17, 2007 Author Share Posted September 17, 2007 I think I am just going to be done with the hole situation, I visited with him last night, he came on to me and then stopped when things got hot and heavy... maby he has erectile disfunction I don't knonw Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted September 17, 2007 Share Posted September 17, 2007 hole situation, ..... Stone.. Why not just blurt it out and tell him how you are feeling and ask him why is doing the hot/cold thing ? Link to post Share on other sites
monkey00 Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 Who knows it can be anything. He could be seeing someone else, sleeping with someone else. Or worst case scenario he doesnt want to feel used for sex because you guys used to be a one night stand. Maybe he wants a relationship but witholds the sex to keep it in line....these are all possiblities. I dont know about this dude, but any guy that witholds sex is either gay, impotent, or just isnt sexually into a girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Saxis Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 ... or he considers the one night stand an "accident" that he shouldn't have let happen, and he actually DOES want to get to know you. I know I would feel awkward about it after that... Link to post Share on other sites
Allison85 Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 I think that he might be into you and yes, eventhough you have had sex before, he seems to want to take things slower this time around. Is it all intamacy or just the sex? If you guys are say cuddling or even kissing eachother I think thats a really good sign, I mean he is taking you out to dinner right!! If I were you I would gear down and maybe not initiate sex at all, you don't want him to think that you just want to be friends with benifits. Sex isn't everything, although it is super hard to go a while, I think he will definitely respect you more and better appreciate the time you spend together if he doesn't feel pressured at the end of every night to have sex. I'm sure he doesn't want to say no but at the same time if he wants more to come out of this than sex, than he is doing the right thing by saying no or leaving when he thinks it's coming. I would suggest cooling down and enjoy his company, If it's a relationship your looking for than I think he may be into the same thing. If you maybe aren't looking for a relationship with him and you are just looking for the sexual side of things than I would proabably move on because it seems like he is interested in more. Link to post Share on other sites
IamASelfishSOB Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 I've been seeing this guy for about 2 months, I had a one night stand with him about 8 months ago and we just started talking again in July. Things started out very slow this time, we hung out as friends no kissing ect. untill I finally took the leap.. now that we are becoming more "affectionate" he is confusing the crap out of me!! I attempted to have sex with him last week and he made jokes when he was having any "excitement" and stopped suddenly and said he had to go.... However he called later in the day stating that he really enjoys my company bla bla bla... So Friday he took me to a nice dinner, and drinks then I invited him back to my house and he declined!! I don't understand what the issue is, I am not bad in bed! I've gone thru every sinerio possible and can not come up with a conclusion.. I love his company, his friendship, and want to take things further. I truly care about him as a person with or with out the sex but I don't understand. He is giving signals that he is intrested.. EX taking me out, calling me talking for hours, giving me compliments.. what gives? The guy is nervous about having sex with you (just my guess). He probably had some kind of sexual disfunction in the past and is worried about it happening again. THAT DOES NOT MEAN THEIR IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH HIS PLUMBING. It just means he needs to be very comfortable with you to make everything work right. Make him comfortable. Do put any demands on him sexually. Don't act overly aggressive and make him nervous about performing. After he gets past the initial nervousness, you will have hot and wild sex, trust me. If he does try and fail. Let him understand that you know what the deal is and that it is no big deal. "We'll just keep trying until it works. I can wait as long as I need to. I know this happens to all kinds of guys. Really, I do. I read about it on the internet." Of course this is all speculation and this only applies if you really like the dude. There is a 99% chance he'll be a remarkable lover. Probably will be into giving more than receiving. Have fun. Link to post Share on other sites
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