Jorobot Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 Let me start with some background. I'm 17 and a senior in high school. I'm pretty shy, and so have never dated. I'm sort of sick of it, though, and so have been working on being more assertive and less shy. A couple of months ago I met a girl I'm really into. We've talked 5 or 6 times since then, and I think we hit it off pretty well. I finally work up the courage to call her yesterday, and ask her if she wanted to maybe grab lunch and a movie on Sunday. She responded by saying she wasn't sure how her schedule for Sunday looked, but she would call me back and let me know. 24 hours later, she hasn't called me back. I don't know what this response means. Is she interested, but just not sure if she can make it? Was she unsure what to say? Did she not know a polite way to tell me no? Was she expecting me to call her and I misinterpreted it? I want to call her, but I'm scared she'll think I didn't take the hint that she doesn't want to. I tend to go over these things in my head until it drives me insane. I'm not even sure if she just thinks this is a "just friends" thing. (I've had that happen before, where I thought it was a date and the other girl thought it was totally platonic.) Can you help me out and make me a little less confused? I don't have a lot of experience with this stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 Call her back, she was probably just busy. Don't read too much into things. She may just have a crazy schedule. Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 Hi there, You wrote: I finally work up the courage to call her yesterday, and ask her if she wanted to maybe grab lunch and a movie on Sunday. She responded by saying she wasn't sure how her schedule for Sunday looked, but she would call me back and let me know. 24 hours later, she hasn't called me back. I sure don't want to hurt your feelings at all, but my guess is that she responded the way she did, and did NOT return your call, because she's not interested and simply didn't want to hurt your feelings. I don't generally buy the "I'll have to check my schedule" line.....in most cases, people know a few days in advance what their schedule is like, particularly when it comes to the weekend...and they have a pretty good idea whether they'd have the time to fit in lunch and a movie.......at least to the extent of saying something like, "I think I could swing it, but I'll let you know for sure on Friday or Saturday, just have to double check" (something like that). If someone really WANTS to accept someone's offer, they will generally check their schedule right away...so that they can give the person asking, an answer ASAP. I would NOT call her back, for if I'm right, it will only look like you're desperate or unable to 'take a hint'.....and it will be awkward for both. About being shy, good for YOU that you found the courage to ask her out. Just because she's not interested (if this is truly the case), don't let that be a reason to stop asking people out.......don't let it ruin your confidence or self esteem. Just keep plugging away! Also.....are you positive she had your phone number, so that she COULD call you back to give you an answer? Is there any possibility she called you but you're just not aware? Link to post Share on other sites
Jorobot Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 Well...I think i know why she didn't call me back. I talked to a mutual friend of ours today...he told me that she had broken up with her boyfriend after I called her. She'd been pretty upset, and so apparently didn't call me back. This leaves me even more confused. I did not know she had a boyfriend; she never hinted this to me any time i talked to her. So maybe she was just blowing me off. But now what do I do? She doesn't know I know about her boyfriend. Do I call her back, and ask her to do something again? Do I give her some space for a while? Do I forget about her entirely? I still really like her, and feel for her if she's upset, but I can't just call her up and ask about it. Link to post Share on other sites
cindy0039 Posted April 15, 2003 Share Posted April 15, 2003 I'd say just give her some time to get over the last boyfriend, then call her up and just chat. Then maybe after a few conversations you could get a feel for how she feels about you and try asking her out again. Let us know how it goes. ~Cindy~ Link to post Share on other sites
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