trh Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Hello ladies, I need your advice on this. A couple of months ago I met a girl at my work. We got to talking about books and pretty much hit it off right away. A coworker of mine even said she was checking me out the whole time she was there. I bartend at a restaurant and she comes in two or three times a week. We always have a good conversation and she is always looking at me and smiling. We have also talked on the phone a few times. Last week I asked her out and she said yes. We went out last wed., I picked her up at her place and we went to dinner. The entire night she kept giving me mixed signals. Everything from the hair toss while looking at me/and then looking right at me to avoiding eye contact, from laughing together to speaking so softly I could barely her her talk. As we are getting ready to leave, our server who was a very nice lady, puts her hand on my dates shoulder and says to me "You have a very special girl her" and then says to the two of us "The two of you make a good couple" Anyways I bring her home, as we are pulling in she says "I would invite you up but there is really nothing to do, my cable is not even hooked up yet" (She just moved in to a new place) we get to her place and I tell her I am going to walk her up to her apartment. She says to me "You dont have to, but get out of the car so I can hug you" As I am approaching her I say "I had a really good time tonight and I do want to see you again" She replys with a energetic, head nodding up and down "Yes, definitely, call me" We hugged and I kissed her on the cheek. That was the end of our date. One more thing, on the night I asked her out, for the first time that I had seen, she wore her hair down, on her shoulders. She normally wears it up, I even told her how good it looked that way, and that she should wear it down more often. Sure enough, she wore it down for our date. Which I took as a very good sign. I called her two days later to say hello. I got her voice mail. I left a message saying that I had a really good time with her, and that it was good company, good conversation and I loved getting to know more about her. I ended the message by telling her to call me. This was several days ago, and she has not called me back. Now Im thinking it was not such a good idea to leave a message. Usually Im pretty good at reading a womans body language and knowing if she is into me, but this girl had me all confused. Can any ladies out there, give me some advice on this, I would greatly appreciate it. trh70 Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyLovely2 Posted September 22, 2007 Share Posted September 22, 2007 It sounds like to me she liked you on the night you went out. Maybe she just feels that the two of you wouldn't work out and doesn't want to bother with it. Or maybe she honestly just hasn't had time to call you back yet. It's only been a couple days, wait a couple more...and if she doesn't call, maybe call her again and leave a message but just don't seem stalkerish.. goodluck Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted September 22, 2007 Share Posted September 22, 2007 It sounds like she had a good time during your date. It is possible she maybe getting over someone else or is also dating others. It's also possible that she likes you a lot but doesn't want to come across as too eager, hence the wait, which IMO is such a silly game to play. I could come up with a million reasons but regardless, it's a waiting game. Give it a couple more days and call her again, leaving a message. This will ensure that it's not her need for affirmation that you really are interested. Pride on both sides can be so ridiculous but hey, it's a reality. Good luck. I do hope this works out for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author trh Posted September 22, 2007 Author Share Posted September 22, 2007 It is possible she maybe getting over someone else or is also dating others. Yes, I do think that is part of the problem. She told me a couple weeks back, that she had just starting dating some guy about five months ago, who was cheating on her with her roommate. Before the two of them even had sex. So, Im thinking she is having trust issues and intimacy issues for fear of being hurt again. trh70 Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted September 22, 2007 Share Posted September 22, 2007 Yes, I do think that is part of the problem. She told me a couple weeks back, that she had just starting dating some guy about five months ago, who was cheating on her with her roommate. Before the two of them even had sex. So, Im thinking she is having trust issues and intimacy issues for fear of being hurt again. trh70 It's possible. As a bartender, I would guess some women would view you with some trepidation because of your opportunity to meet so many women. If you feel she's worth the effort, call again. Once again, life's too short for regrets. Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted September 22, 2007 Share Posted September 22, 2007 Im not a female Im a man, and personaly I think that you are even looking for a females pov on this is the bad direction. First off lets go to the begining, I think she did have a good time on your date from what u wrote butttttttt Why didnt you go for a kiss on the lips, worst that could have happened would of been... nothing really.... and the entire Id invite you up but no cable hmmmmm You should have tried to get up there could of been some heavy petting ... sex even. You could have been well I just want to see your place, look at what ever..... then once your in bam heat things up. The msg very bad move, should have just hung up she has caller id or what ever, just call back some other time but... dont really leave msgs. Id move on if I were you she'll call if she likes you, sounds like you are focusing in on this one girl u dont even really know a little to much date more women, and show more passion on your dates, no kissing - no touching comes off like a little to friendly Link to post Share on other sites
lazer1743 Posted September 26, 2007 Share Posted September 26, 2007 Very well put KMT, the saying "nice guys finish last" sums it up pretty well. though i think most guys take that saying to the other extreme and expect that jerks get all the chicks. you have to be in between the nice guy and the bad boy. too nice and your giving off that you just want to be friends, too mean and they wont hang around you very long. in short, you should have at least went in...... it sounded like and invite to me. that would have been a great chance to get close to her in an environment she feels comfy in. After a while if things are going great, slow it down before it gets to far and call it a night. save some for later (leave her curious)......if you really like this girl, be mr. right, not mr. right now. Link to post Share on other sites
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