I want to quit drinking for good!

[dvsxx6]

I just turned 21 years old almost a month ago and I realize that I want to quit drinking, for good. That may seem like a very bold thing to say, but I believe I need to do what's best for my life. I am a maniac when I drink, and I become very loose, and out of control. Guys take advantage of me. I let them. I have no self respect when I'm drunk. I say rude things to my family. I've put myself through enough humiliation and shame, and what's worse, is that I've hurt the ones I love the most. I'm not the friendly, loving and outgoing person that I usually am. I'm selfish, rude, and mean-spirited. According to my Mom, I'm "Dr. Jekyl and Ms. Hyde". I need a change, and i need it right now. Drinking is not fun anymore.

 

I would like to know what other things there are to do besides drinking. I'm tired of living this addictive-lifestyle. I love to try new things, even when there's a risk involved but at times, I get bored too easily. But when I like something, when I really like something, I do it hard. It's been tough cause I've been through a lot of different kinds of addictions over the years [weed, cocaine, pain killers, working out [i think i still have a working out addiction?] and have been clean from drugs for 3 years. I've overcome those things through my own will-power. Drinking shouldn't be that hard. I've also recently quit smoking cigarettes, so I'm happy about that.

 

Even though alcohol is my demise, I'm afraid of the change that'll come with abandoning it. I don't want to spend my weekends watching TV, playing board games or collecting coins or whatever non-drinkers do. I don't want to spend my time reading on weekends [although I do enjoy reading]. I know that's a really mean stereotype, but I guess that's my view of going from a full blast party lifestyle to a life of no alcohol. I KNOW deep down people who don't drink aren't all boring. I would just like to know what kinds of activities there are to do besides drinking because I am tired of regretting things I do while I'm drinking and making some pretty awful decisions.

 

I think without alcohol, I'd be able to rely more on myself than on a stupid posion just to feel good. The thing is, I thought my self esteem is/was high: I work out 5x a week and I eat pretty healthily. I take great care of myself. I know that alcohol won't solve anything though, and I just need some help in finding other ways to have fun.. Any suggestions? Thanks in advance.

[shoesies05]

Maybe you can compromise with yourself then...

 

Like when u finish a beer, the next drink should be something non alcoholic like a coke or something { not a jack and coke}

 

then it will ton eyou down because u wont get so drunk.

 

also- have you friends keep an eye on how much you drink. otherwise, i dunno what to say because i think it really is all about control. it seems you know what you're doing... so why cant u stop it?

 

if it HAS to be done, then yes... quit drinking. but that doesnt mean you can still party with your friends ull just be the DD.

[Poboy]

make new friends if your current ones are the reason you are out and drinking a lot.

know your limits as to how much you drink and and drink lesser than that.

try to cut down on the number of times you go out and drink in a week/month. you will see a lot of improvement in due time.

 

there are tons of other activities ... going for movies , plays , coffee shops , dinner etc rather than hitting clubs , pubs or parties. do some volunteering / community service.

 

i learnt the hard way too but now i drink rarely when the occasion demands it and drink responsibly.

[Woggle]

Hang out at coffee houses where they don't serve alchohol.

[dvsxx6]

Thanks for the replies. Well, yesterday I went over to a friend's condo and he asked if I wanted a drink. I said "No thanks" so he drank..I was totally fine with it. I really didn't have a need to drink even though I had butterflies around him. then after about 20 min later, he asked me if I wanted wine and I said hm.. "Ok..." kind of reluctant to do it. At first I was very disappointed with myself because I was having fun talking and flirting with him without alcohol! . I wasn't 100% sure about giving in, but I did! -_- I was still concerned about my drinking problem, so I changed my approach to How I drank my wine. I drank it VERY SLOWLY, and then when I had the beer afterwards. I took like 15-20 min to drink it. I usually would drink a beer in less than 5 minutes.. and I would drink 10-15 beers when I'd go out [And I'm only 5'1 and 100 Lbs!]. So everything would hit me big time and I wouldn't even realize I'm drunk

 

The total amount I drank yesterday/last nite was a half glass of wine and 3 beers but that was over the course of 1 hour or so. And I took breaks cause I was somewhat distracted by being w/ my friend..That was great considering I would normally drink and drink and drink and the buzz/drunk feeling would just HIT me all at one time. Yesterday, for the first time, I really believe that I was in control of myself while drinking because I paced myself, which I've NEVER done before. I would just go for it non-stop

 

I was SO surprised and VERY proud of myself that I could actually drink SLOWLY for once, STILL be able to make sense and how I'm STILL able to REMEMBER what the other person was talking to me about, lol. And my friend and I had a great time, and I remember it hehe

 

Thanks again for the comments, and this is still a work in progress but I think that my eyes are completely opened to a different side of myself. A side I never thought I had, and it was something so basic as to just SLOW DOWN.

[Geoffrey]

...that I can be just as much, if not more, of a kook when I'm sober.

 

I was formatting some silly newsletter for another department where I work, and although it was a little bit of effort, I laughed until I nearly tore myself in two thinking up silly headlines and sneaking silly comments and such into the articles. I didn't act on these ideas - but it sure made the afternoon pass much easier and I actually enjoyed it more. And I did it all stone cold sober, too.

 

If you find you cannot drink like a normal person any longer....and you've tried to again and again....then it's time to take a fearless moral inventory of one's self. And make a difficult but very rewarding decision, if you think it is the right one for you.

 

Life is beautiful sober....come join it. You can do it!

[dvsxx6]

Lol. Yes, the sober life is nice, and I'm sober mainly throughout my school week [5 days a week]. Weekends, not so much. Living a sober life is ideal for me, but now that I've realized that I DO have more control of my drinking than I originally thought... [as I wrote in my most recent response in this thread, that I've never learned to pace myself while drinking], it gives me some hope that I can maintain a lifestyle that includes some alcohol [in moderation, and with control]. Drinking slower actually made a world of a difference for me, and I thought I would have to give up drinking entirely. Never did slowing myself down ever cross my mind, until I wrote in this forum and I really thought hard about my Mom saying to not drink AS quickly. So maybe I don't have to give up alcohol entirely after all, I just have to drink SLOWLY and with caution.. but have fun @ the same time.

 

Glad to hear that you're enjoying yourself while being sober. Especially at work. It's free and shows that you don't need alcohol to have fun.

[tommyr]

If you are serious about wanting to stop drinking, there is a very simple, effective, and inexpensive solution to this problem: Alcoholics Anonymous.

Open up the phone book, call the number for AA, tell the person who answers what you have said on here - I want to quit drinking for good

 

It really does work - I was your age when I started in AA and I have now been sober (still in AA) for 19+ years.

[Woggle]

It is good if you can learn to have only 2 or 3 drinks for an entire night. Just drink very slowly.

[Msblueyes]

I think the 2-3 drinks & doing it slowly is good. I have done it both ways and slow is better. Also, don't get too excited that you're doing it like that because the next drink might just go real fast. I like the water idea inbetween as well. I will be taking the same advice.

[woodsfield]

I just turned 21 years old almost a month ago and I realize that I want to quit drinking, for good. That may seem like a very bold thing to say, but I believe I need to do what's best for my life. I am a maniac when I drink, and I become very loose, and out of control. Guys take advantage of me. I let them. I have no self respect when I'm drunk. I say rude things to my family. I've put myself through enough humiliation and shame, and what's worse, is that I've hurt the ones I love the most. I'm not the friendly, loving and outgoing person that I usually am. I'm selfish, rude, and mean-spirited. According to my Mom, I'm "Dr. Jekyl and Ms. Hyde". I need a change, and i need it right now. Drinking is not fun anymore.

 

I would like to know what other things there are to do besides drinking. I'm tired of living this addictive-lifestyle. I love to try new things, even when there's a risk involved but at times, I get bored too easily. But when I like something, when I really like something, I do it hard. It's been tough cause I've been through a lot of different kinds of addictions over the years [weed, cocaine, pain killers, working out [i think i still have a working out addiction?] and have been clean from drugs for 3 years. I've overcome those things through my own will-power. Drinking shouldn't be that hard. I've also recently quit smoking cigarettes, so I'm happy about that.

 

Even though alcohol is my demise, I'm afraid of the change that'll come with abandoning it. I don't want to spend my weekends watching TV, playing board games or collecting coins or whatever non-drinkers do. I don't want to spend my time reading on weekends [although I do enjoy reading]. I know that's a really mean stereotype, but I guess that's my view of going from a full blast party lifestyle to a life of no alcohol. I KNOW deep down people who don't drink aren't all boring. I would just like to know what kinds of activities there are to do besides drinking because I am tired of regretting things I do while I'm drinking and making some pretty awful decisions.

 

I think without alcohol, I'd be able to rely more on myself than on a stupid posion just to feel good. The thing is, I thought my self esteem is/was high: I work out 5x a week and I eat pretty healthily. I take great care of myself. I know that alcohol won't solve anything though, and I just need some help in finding other ways to have fun.. Any suggestions? Thanks in advance.

 

wow! quitting coke and smokes should have been more difficult than drinking. does alcoholism run in the fam?? i know some people that are Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde; they are functioning alcoholics, tho.

 

all i can say is that there is plenty to do out there as a "non-drinker". working out is a good start. i'm guessing you are in a drinking town or at a party school, right?? that may be why you don't know of anything else besides drinking and partying. i've been there, but i'm the 28 year old beer drinking dad, so what do i know about quitting drinking.

 

if you like the outdoors, try that and that being anything outdoors (cycling, hiking, or running) basically taking your workouts outside. find someone who would enjoy doing that with you...you may find them at AA, which is where you need to start.

 

reading groups are good , but that may be too dorky for you.

[woodsfield]

If you are serious about wanting to stop drinking, there is a very simple, effective, and inexpensive solution to this problem: Alcoholics Anonymous.

Open up the phone book, call the number for AA, tell the person who answers what you have said on here - I want to quit drinking for good

 

It really does work - I was your age when I started in AA and I have now been sober (still in AA) for 19+ years.

 

yeah, what he said.

[bish]

Ask your doctor. I believe there is a pill they can prescribe that, when taken on a daily basis, makes you vomit if you ingest any alcohol.

 

After a while if you do end up puking after a slight drink, you may not want to drink anymore even though you may have discontinued taking the pill out of conditioned response.

[Woggle]

Ask your doctor. I believe there is a pill they can prescribe that, when taken on a daily basis, makes you vomit if you ingest any alcohol.

 

After a while if you do end up puking after a slight drink, you may not want to drink anymore even though you may have discontinued taking the pill out of conditioned response.

 

I don't think she has to go that far. Some people can't even touch alchohol without having to get drunk and they even make special mouthwash for people who are that severe in their alchoholism but this doesn't sound like her case. I would go with the having 3 or 3 drinks a night and the rest of the night drinking something without alchohol.

[Jade 02]

Oh Hun,and you should quit drinking if it affects you that way,It affected me the same way,and it prgressed tro rapes,and all kinds of bad things ,jail included. I quit on my own no AA,and no white knuckleing it,I just quiy=t cuz I wanted to,and got sick of the sick **** that came with the booze,I own my own home now,and I wake up with no hangovers,and feel darn good about myself.

 

You can do this too hun just put it down or things will get worse,even jail or death. I also likehaving my drivers lisnense(sp). Please do it for yourself,and self respect,If ya need help there is plenty of help out there,just hit the phonebooks. I CARE!!!

Jade

[dvsxx6]

Thank you everyone for all your great comments!! It reaaally means a lot to me. Well lately I haven't been drinking so much but when I do drink, instead of drinking 10-15 beers a nite, I'd drink maybe 3 or 4. I've learned to pace myself. And I know one of the commenters suggested that I work out and do outdoorsy activities. I do work out 5-6x a week and I think that's a problem too. Lol. but yea, I'm getting help for my addictions.

 

Thanks again!

[tommyr]

Thank you everyone for all your great comments!! It reaaally means a lot to me. Well lately I haven't been drinking so much but when I do drink, instead of drinking 10-15 beers a nite, I'd drink maybe 3 or 4. I've learned to pace myself. And I know one of the commenters suggested that I work out and do outdoorsy activities. I do work out 5-6x a week and I think that's a problem too. Lol. but yea, I'm getting help for my addictions.

 

Thanks again!

 

That is great. In all sincerity, I do hope you are not like me (an alcoholic) because if so then over time your 3-4 beers will start creeping back up to 10-15 once again. If that does happen (maybe a year+ from now) please remember what I said about AA - it works when nothing else does.

[dvsxx6]

Thank you Tommyr. I really wish you the best and I will keep in mind what you said about AA. Right now I'm just pacing my drinking and seeing what works. If I need to, I'll go to AA.

 

Good luck and Take care Tommy and Thanks for the comment.