glittergurl Posted September 30, 2007 Share Posted September 30, 2007 I think you're fooling yourself into a big mess waiting to happen. And you're loving every minute of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sunny44 Posted October 1, 2007 Author Share Posted October 1, 2007 I think you're fooling yourself into a big mess waiting to happen. And you're loving every minute of it. I think some of you are getting way ahead of the story here. Mark is not suing me, nor does he have any reason to. I am not in any mess, nor do I plan to be. Mark is no longer even my employee. I won't ever see him at work again. He is under an entirely different management structure, in an entirely different building, and working on an entirely different function. Our paths will never cross at work. Most people I work with are involved with, or married to someone else they are working with (that they met here at work). So, if I got involved with Mark, it wouldn't exactly be eye-popping at work. My biggest concern right now is his claim that he is sexually inexperienced. Although there is nothing about him that suggests he is not being truthful, I have to ask this question. Would any guy say that he is inexperienced just for kicks? I mean, it sounds like a crazy question, but I am not sure if this might be something he cooked up to reel me in. I am not turned-on by inexperience, but he might think I am. Who knows? Or could he be so insecure that he is downplaying himself so that I don't expect much? I find it hard to believe that he is totally inexperienced. We've been texting for the past 2 hours. He just told me that he's been thinking about me all day. I ought to text him back and ask him, "Why are you such a weirdo?" Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sunny44 Posted October 1, 2007 Author Share Posted October 1, 2007 I hope your telephone conversations are taped at work and you've retained all the text messages on your cell phone. I'm not certain about your jurisdiction but in mine, if there's doubt, the courts tend to rule in favour of the employee. It's gotten so bad that most companies don't bother going to court. They just pay off the employee and fire or demote the management staff involved. Mark is not taking me to court for becoming his friend. I am as certain about that as I am that I am typing this post. In my jurisdiction, you cannot sue someone, and win, for engaging in a mutual friendship. There is no such tort. I appreciate your effort, but nobody will be suing me. Yes, I understand that there are crazy people out there that will sue for anything and lie their butts off in court for some $$$$$. I can assure you that Mark isn't one of them. As complicated as he is on the romantic side, he's become my friend. In fact, he just texted me again to ask me to bring him some things he left behind in the office. I might text him back and tell him that it has been suggested that he might sue me in court in the future. I'm sure he'll get a few laughs out of that. Thanks for your concern, anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
glittergurl Posted October 1, 2007 Share Posted October 1, 2007 When I mentioned a mess, I wasn't even thinking about a law suit. Honestly, coworkers **** each other all the time without dragging each other to court. No, a messy relationship and situation in general was more what I was implying. And from everything you have posted here, I am pretty sure that a gigantic mess is exactly what you're heading towards with this guy. Would any guy say that he is inexperienced just for kicks? I mean, it sounds like a crazy question, but I am not sure if this might be something he cooked up to reel me in. I am not turned-on by inexperience, but he might think I am. Who knows? Or could he be so insecure that he is downplaying himself so that I don't expect much? You're wondering about such silly things. I hate to sound harsh about this, but the state of mind you're in right now honestly sounds pathetic. You're 34, right? Doesn't a woman your age have the confidence to just have a talk with a guy (especially when he's 10 years younger)? You don't want to listen to anybody's oppinion here; all you want people to tell you is what the hell is going on in his head, and why he says this, and does that, and yada yada yada. That's not even something we could possibly answer. Lay off the text messages. Text messages are for wusses and teenagers. Whenever you're not his boss anymore, pick up the phone, call him, take him out for lunch or dinner or whatever, and have a long and open talk with him about it all. In the mean time, I would seriously stop with the text flirting. It's messing with your mind, and whether you'll admit or not, it's making you vulnerable in many ways. No good & healthy relationship (and may I add, positive situation) can come out of vulnerability; whether that vulnerability is coming from one side or both. If he really is a virgin or inexperienced, then you can expect him to learn all the valuable lessons you'll teach him for a while, and then run with it to get a hot girl his age. And then guess who'll be the fool. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted October 1, 2007 Share Posted October 1, 2007 I agree on the text message nonsense. If you're spending all that time texting, then you can TALK on the phone. That ought to help your conversations make more sense! You won't have all these - what did he mean by that - kinds of questions. In an actual conversation, you can ASK, he can answer, you can hear each other's voices, you can understand a hell of a lot more than you can get across in a text. Link to post Share on other sites
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