Discovery day again

[TogetherForever]

You do know there are MM who left their Ws for their OW and are actually happy, right? You are aware of that as much you are aware that there are MM that stay with their Ws, right?

 

Or do you just choose to accept the latter only?

 

 

 

Like I said earlier, there are OW who can accept being an OW and those who cannot and want more than just being an OW. You clearly understand that so just bloody accept that instead of being a freaking broken record.

 

As much as a lot of OW here accept all the bullcr*p from BS, why don't all of you accept that MM are telling OW the truth?

 

Some of you are definitely not in our situation so I don't any of you BS could possibly understand what we are going through as much as you all would like to think so. You have no freaking idea at all. Just like me, I have no idea what goes on behind your closed doors BUT I know what's happening in my MM's M and no, not just from him. Just accept that like we all always have to bear with BS coming here and bashing every single OW here... be it new or old.

 

 

This post is a broken record too ya know:D.

[whichwayisup]

You do know there are MM who left their Ws for their OW and are actually happy, right? You are aware of that as much you are aware that there are MM that stay with their Ws, right?

 

Yes, obviously it happens. Just go take a read on the many many threads here.. HOW many MM actually leave their wives? Maybe one or two to every 300.

 

As much as a lot of OW here accept all the bullcr*p from BS, why don't all of you accept that MM are telling OW the truth?

 

A man or a woman who lies to their spouse, betrays them in the worst possible way, is not a trustworthy person in the sense of telling the truth ALL time. If you want to believe every word that comes out of your MM's mouth, so be it...He just may "omit" the truth from you, and not tell you certain things. Technically, that's not lying, is it?? It's still pretty damn close.

 

Like I said earlier, there are OW who can accept being an OW and those who cannot and want more than just being an OW. You clearly understand that so just bloody accept that instead of being a freaking broken record.

 

And those OW who hang on in hopes that the MM will leave, are just fooling themselves. Sorry, but after a year, two years, five years...The reality is he is NOT leaving.

 

Some of you are definitely not in our situation so I don't any of you BS could possibly understand what we are going through as much as you all would like to think so.

 

True. But reverse it, I doubt many OW know what it's like to be a betrayed spouse. The damage that is done.

 

It's an ongoing discussion here and some respect the BW, and some BW respect the OW.

[luvmy2ns]

why don't all of you accept that MM are telling OW the truth?

 

For one thing, a MM who is f'ing around behind his family's back is alREADY a proven sneaky, lying, cheat. For another, an OW who keeps hanging on for years, living on the promise of the MM's impending divorce, isn't being helped by anyone telling her, "Oh, yeah, honey. Of course he's telling you the truth." There are many reasons for a MM to lie to the OW - paramount is to keep them dangling.

[reboot]

Yes, obviously it happens. Just go take a read on the many many threads here.. HOW many MM actually leave their wives? Maybe one or two to every 300.

And most of those didn't actually leave, they were eventually kicked out by the wife.

[Havn_a_life]

Sorry to be harsh, but the reality (not fantasy) IS, a MM who keeps his OW as his sidedish for a very long time has NO INTENTION of ever leaving his wife and kids.

 

Think about it. If a MM falls inlove with another woman, he'll do everything possible to end his marriage as quickly and painless as possible so he and his OW can start their lives together.

 

These are the points I've been trying to make, but obviously not too well. lol

If a MM feels for the OW bad enough, he'll leave his W, M, kids, whatever, to be with her. No one stopped him from starting an A, did they? He did it on his own. His decision.

If the A partner was worth (to him) giving up his family and homelife, he would. He would deal with the split custody, CS payments, alimony payments, whatever, because he would be doing what made him most happy.

[Havn_a_life]

Or perhaps this opinion is the "truth" you prefer to agree with?

 

It is truth. It's just really sad that some of the posters choose not to think about it in that light.

[Havn_a_life]

Like I said, " If I want too",, BUT GUESS WHAT? I don't wanna:laugh:

 

Yeah, unfortunately for the BW in your situation. I really feel for her.

 

Perhaps you won't be so glib in the future, should the MM decide his W is more important than what you offer him on the side.

There's always hope.

[Havn_a_life]

There is really only one truth in each affair situation. Either you have a MM who really does plan to leave his wife and end up with the OW, or he's being honest and telling the OW he isn't going to leave his wife, but the OW continues to feel he may someday change his mind, so hangs on anyway, and then there's the MM who's a lying sneak. I think, in most situations, the latter is "the truth." But some will always be blind and refuse to see the MM for what he "truly" is.

 

Well, until he proves it to her by ending the A, and going back to his W.

Then, the OW's all for agreeing on what a sneaky, selfish, lying...you get my point.

[Havn_a_life]

You do know there are MM who left their Ws for their OW and are actually happy, right? You are aware of that as much you are aware that there are MM that stay with their Ws, right?

 

Or do you just choose to accept the latter only?

 

 

Well, lately, I know of an OW who's just like that (but not happy). And from what we're hearing, she's been a living hell to the man she M, her former cheating MM.

 

 

Like I said earlier, there are OW who can accept being an OW and those who cannot and want more than just being an OW. You clearly understand that so just bloody accept that instead of being a freaking broken record.

 

As much as a lot of OW here accept all the bullcr*p from BS, why don't all of you accept that MM are telling OW the truth?

 

 

Cause if he's lying to his W, he's lying to you, and if you can't believe that, then God help ya. You're in for a big shocker!

 

Some of you are definitely not in our situation so I don't any of you BS could possibly understand what we are going through as much as you all would like to think so. You have no freaking idea at all. Just like me, I have no idea what goes on behind your closed doors BUT I know what's happening in my MM's M and no, not just from him. Just accept that like we all always have to bear with BS coming here and bashing every single OW here... be it new or old.

 

Bashing? There's people trying to tell it straight like it is.

[Mino]

why are there sooooo many Betrayed wives on this side of the fence??? Are they not supposed to hang out on the infidelity board with the other betrayed spouses so they can bitch an moan to each other. Kinda over their lectures now, Yawn:bunny:

[OpenBook]

Nah, I didn't abandon him.

 

Naw, there's nothing hid between us.

 

Hey do you guys notice a pattern here? "Naw, Nah, Neh..." The Bashing BS's seem to say it whenever we OW's make a good point, and they're not sure how to respond. :D DENIAL - the BS's MO. You guys really crack me up.

[silktricks]

You do know there are MM who left their Ws for their OW and are actually happy, right? You are aware of that as much you are aware that there are MM that stay with their Ws, right?

 

of course there are.

 

why don't all of you accept that MM are telling OW the truth?

Some MM are telling the OW the truth. Some MM are lying through their teeth.

 

Some MM after D-Day tell the spouses the truth. Some lie through their teeth.

 

Some of you are definitely not in our situation so I don't any of you BS could possibly understand what we are going through as much as you all would like to think so. You have no freaking idea at all. Just like me, I have no idea what goes on behind your closed doors BUT I know what's happening in my MM's M and no, not just from him. Just accept that like we all always have to bear with BS coming here and bashing every single OW here... be it new or old.

The truth is that none of us here know what's going on in the other posters lives. Some (both BS and OP) want to understand and/or help, some just want to beat up on the "opposite" be it OP or BS.

[silktricks]

Hey do you guys notice a pattern here? "Naw, Nah, Neh..." The Bashing BS's seem to say it whenever we OW's make a good point, and they're not sure how to respond. :D DENIAL - the BS's MO. You guys really crack me up.

 

You made a good point? When was that?

 

And how is it that me talking about my experience is bashing you and your experience?

[Je Ne Regrette Rien]

So this thread has come to conclusion that...there are some MM who leave for their OW and some that dont. There are some MM who return to BWs and tell the truth and some MM who return to their BWs and dont. That there are some OWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that aren't. There are some BWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that arent.

 

Aren't we covering old ground here with this debate? It wont ever be solved, not by criticising other posters, not by exclaiming "This is the truth". We all come from different perspectives, different relationships, different social factors - different people!!!

[Mino]

So this thread has come to conclusion that...there are some MM who leave for their OW and some that dont. There are some MM who return to BWs and tell the truth and some MM who return to their BWs and dont. That there are some OWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that aren't. There are some BWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that arent.

 

Aren't we covering old ground here with this debate? It wont ever be solved, not by criticising other posters, not by exclaiming "This is the truth". We all come from different perspectives, different relationships, different social factors - different people!!!

very well said, , so its time to close this thread, and move onto different subjects, Thank you all for particpating, and to all a goodnight.

[overandout]

These are the points I've been trying to make, but obviously not too well. lol

If a MM feels for the OW bad enough, he'll leave his W, M, kids, whatever, to be with her. No one stopped him from starting an A, did they? He did it on his own. His decision.

If the A partner was worth (to him) giving up his family and homelife, he would. He would deal with the split custody, CS payments, alimony payments, whatever, because he would be doing what made him most happy.

 

 

Precisely.

When he just wants the affair he will continue "as long as he can get away with it" and it doesn't cause him grief and/or impact on his marriage.

[frannie]

So this thread has come to conclusion that...there are some MM who leave for their OW and some that dont. There are some MM who return to BWs and tell the truth and some MM who return to their BWs and dont. That there are some OWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that aren't. There are some BWs who are in denial of whats happening and some that arent.

 

Aren't we covering old ground here with this debate? It wont ever be solved, not by criticising other posters, not by exclaiming "This is the truth". We all come from different perspectives, different relationships, different social factors - different people!!!

 

Yes, very very old ground. It's not so much a debate as an opportunity for people to take up entrenched positions and do a bit of Friday night battery I don't think anyone takes this kind of thing seriously on here any longer...

[LikeNoOther]

And most of those didn't actually leave, they were eventually kicked out by the wife.

 

Must be the ones you know...

 

My friend's H left because he couldn't stand her.

[LikeNoOther]

why are there sooooo many Betrayed wives on this side of the fence??? Are they not supposed to hang out on the infidelity board with the other betrayed spouses so they can bitch an moan to each other. Kinda over their lectures now, Yawn:bunny:

 

Must be because Hs are giving them the attention they need.. hence them hanging around here moaning and b!tching!

[Lyssa]

very well said, , so its time to close this thread, and move onto different subjects, Thank you all for particpating, and to all a goodnight.

 

LOL - trust me, Mino - it's not going to be that easy.

 

You will see BW coming here again and again still trying to make a point. I use 'still trying' because they just cannot accept it when OW don't see it their way.

 

They will NEVER leave OW alone. They just can't. They are unhappy therefore they want other people to be just unhappy.

[Mino]

Gee, I thought JNRR ended my threat quite nicely!!! It was perfect, accepting everyones op. This thread is over, maybe I start a new one:bunny:

[Je Ne Regrette Rien]

Gee, I thought JNRR ended my threat quite nicely!!! It was perfect, accepting everyones op. This thread is over, maybe I start a new one:bunny:

 

Lol, Mino, shall I try it again?

 

Goodnight, godbless and thankyou for listening...

 

See if that works?

[Havn_a_life]

Hey do you guys notice a pattern here? "Naw, Nah, Neh..." The Bashing BS's seem to say it whenever we OW's make a good point, and they're not sure how to respond. :D DENIAL - the BS's MO. You guys really crack me up.

 

Me? In denial? Naw! What's to deny?

How can I lie and say I'm not happy in my M, when I am? Because I get on these boards and post?

That doesn't mean diddly.

There's that word again, bashing...very inappropriate indeed.

[Havn_a_life]

Must be the ones you know...

 

My friend's H left because he couldn't stand her.

 

Of course!

[Havn_a_life]

LOL - trust me, Mino - it's not going to be that easy.

 

You will see BW coming here again and again still trying to make a point. I use 'still trying' because they just cannot accept it when OW don't see it their way.

 

They will NEVER leave OW alone. They just can't. They are unhappy therefore they want other people to be just unhappy.

 

Not true! Not true! I've gone through a nasty few months in my M, some yrs ago, but I am happy now.

Maybe some of the former BWs who come here are really trying to show the OWs that they can find some semblance of happiness, and it doesn't have to come from spending an hour or 2 with some guy who's M to some other woman. A guy who'll go home and forget about her, the OW, until he gets an itch again.

 

Stranger things have happened.