overanalytical Posted September 28, 2007 Share Posted September 28, 2007 my fiance and i are getting married the end of january...things have been terrific...until this week. this week has been horrible.... my fiance lost his job the previous week, so that has been a lot of stress. he is okay on money but that will be gone in 2 weeks...and i think it's starting to hit him. he lost his career due to a layoff...he was happy there, great money, now he has to start all over. that's very hard. one of his coworkers, whom was also laid off, was kicked out of his apt by his roommate (the roommates gf didn't like him there and she moved in...long story) so he had no where to go so we told him he can stay with us for 3 months until he too finds a job and can find a place and get back on his feet (he's from up north and we're in the south so it's not like he can just go back home) sooo he moved in monday and it's taken getting used to having another guy in the house, he's great though. very polite, doesn't make a mess, just a good roommate. well, this is when my week went horrible. i don't know what is going on. it's like my fiance has a stronger bond with him now that they've hung out ALL week long! i'm not exaggerating. last night i asked several simple questions throughout the night and i get snapped at. like i'm an idiot for even asking. when all it took was a yes or no nad move on but instead he has to make a big deal out of it. i'm very frustrated...sad...don't know what to do. i don't want these 3 months to be like this. we've set ground rules and such. i just feel like i'm second now. i know i'm not but i'm not understanding why it feels like he wants to be 'mean' to me in front of the roommate guy. ego thing? i don't know.... it has made me so down this week...i know the weeknd is going to be worse. what do i do??????? we haven't had sex, no dinner together, nothing alone. when we do get a second my fiance is all over me and that's great but then the roommate comes back and it's back to making me feel bad and it's like he is ignoring me or doesn't want me around...any advice?? ?opinions???? Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted September 28, 2007 Share Posted September 28, 2007 Don't blame the roommate...... this is your F's choice to treat you this way. If in doubt do not get married..... even the slightest doubt. Link to post Share on other sites
cld24 Posted September 28, 2007 Share Posted September 28, 2007 Tell your fiance that you need to talk. Maybe ask him or tell him a time for you two to sit alone and discuss things. Let him know how you are feeling without making it seem like it is all his fault. Let him know that you understand he may be stressed over being laid-off but that you are there for him. Hope it all works out! Link to post Share on other sites
Author overanalytical Posted September 28, 2007 Author Share Posted September 28, 2007 there's so many new factors being thrown in ie new roommate and this really changes our lifestyle, no job, have money but knowing it is going to end and how to pay bills if cant' find a job, i'm sure all this is adding up and he's nto even realizing he's doing it. i don't think this is grounds for not getting married. i think this is a test. but it sucks. majorly. i don't know how to communicate to him without coming off like a bit#h and i need help with this, i know i do. he was a butt last night and wrote me a sweet email apologizing and called and texted me so that did make me feel better. i dont' know. not sure how the roommate will work out. i need time by myself with my fiance!! i guess i'm missing him Link to post Share on other sites
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