Finding meaning in my life/making my life meaningful

[monkey00]

I wake up, I go to work, I come back home. I watch tv, I hangout with friends, I make conversation, I socialize. I talk to family, I have good grooming habits, I take care of myself, I dress well, I have hobbies/activities..and etc.

 

Day in and day out, I feel like a zombie just going through the moment/life. Although I probably do have a bright future ahead of me with good family and friends, it just feels like I'm not really living my life. It's as if I'm watching myself from a 3rd person perspective. I've been very bored lately, and people dont interest me as much as they used to...I mean sure I joke around, smile, and make conversation but I dont feel anything, I always feel as if my mind is elsewhere. I've also become a poor listener lately also, so it's hard to stay focused and truly BE interested in what others have to say. Even if I were to meet a girl that's interested in me, likely i dont think my mind would be there for anything to happen.

 

Lately I've also been finding myself doing high risk activities, like skydiving, bicycling in the city (daily)...and I dont know why but I have an urge to own a motorcycle.

 

Is this a consequence of stress or something other?

[Trialbyfire]

Has this ever happened to you before? Do you normally crave adrenaline in your life? This isn't a criticism because a number of people I know, including myself, also share this need.

 

Were you more stressed in school or do you find yourself more stressed in your job?

[monkey00]

Has this ever happened to you before? Do you normally crave adrenaline in your life? This isn't a criticism because a number of people I know, including myself, also share this need.

 

Were you more stressed in school or do you find yourself more stressed in your job?

 

I've only been like this the past 2 months as far as I can remember. Usually I dont crave adrenaline in my life. But it seems like there's a craving need to do something new/unpredictable just so I can avoid the thought of everyday routines we call life. But doing it doesnt necessarily bring a rush of adrenaline...

 

I think my job adds to stress. School was good while it lasted, just engaging with classmates and talking about stuff actually made my day. But that was then, this is now. Id hate to say it but I feel like some emotionless bastard...

[Trialbyfire]

I've only been like this the past 2 months as far as I can remember. Usually I dont crave adrenaline in my life. But it seems like there's a craving need to do something new/unpredictable just so I can avoid the thought of everyday routines we call life. But doing it doesnt necessarily bring a rush of adrenaline...

 

I think my job adds to stress. School was good while it lasted, just engaging with classmates and talking about stuff actually made my day. But that was then, this is now. Id hate to say it but I feel like some emotionless bastard...

Okay, then shake it up a bit. Do take up more hobbies that create intense feelings for you. Get that bike, if it helps you get through the day. Either accept your grind and make your non-working time exciting, or find another career or job that gets the ol' adrenaline pumping again.

 

While a relationship isn't the be all or end all of anyone's lives, perhaps this is the element that you're missing, to round out your life.

[monkey00]

Okay, then shake it up a bit. Do take up more hobbies that create intense feelings for you. Get that bike, if it helps you get through the day. Either accept your grind and make your non-working time exciting, or find another career or job that gets the ol' adrenaline pumping again.

Ill be honest, doing it doesnt necessarily create any or much excitement...its just new and different. I would consider getting it but I dont have a garage and well..its the city, stuff happens. A major problem with me is I have to be faced with hardships/challenges to stay motivated - even if that means being happy and excited, or miserable. As much as I favor change, I also enjoy stability.

 

While a relationship isn't the be all or end all of anyone's lives, perhaps this is the element that you're missing, to round out your life.

It could be what I'm missing. But if I'm as bored as it is right now, i dont know if adding a girl to the equation is going to make it worse or better.

[Trialbyfire]

Ill be honest, doing it doesnt necessarily create any or much excitement...its just new and different. I would consider getting it but I dont have a garage and well..its the city, stuff happens. A major problem with me is I have to be faced with hardships/challenges to stay motivated - even if that means being happy and excited, or miserable. As much as I favor change, I also enjoy stability.

Balance. Find other stimulating hobbies and find a job that challenges you more. Set some unreasonable goals for yourself and attain them. It's what's always kept me going. The search for more knowledge and challenge.

 

It could be what I'm missing. But if I'm as bored as it is right now, i dont know if adding a girl to the equation is going to make it worse or better.

Whoah, I smell a guy who might end up with a high-drama girl...but...if it works for you to keep yourself interested, each to their own. In hindsight, apparently that's what I've done, except the male drama queen.

[monkey00]

Balance. Find other stimulating hobbies and find a job that challenges you more. Set some unreasonable goals for yourself and attain them. It's what's always kept me going. The search for more knowledge and challenge.

Well..I did want to take martial arts classes, but my work schedule cuts into it. Who knows maybe I can cut a deal with the boss

 

Whoah, I smell a guy who might end up with a high-drama girl...but...if it works for you to keep yourself interested, each to their own. In hindsight, apparently that's what I've done, except the male drama queen.

 

Hahah whoah hold your horses TBF...no drama queens for me, at least i dont think so. If that ever became the case, I may as well me screwed in the head as much as her But thanks for the laugh! It made my day

 

I was talking to my friend about it and he brought up this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization_disorder

It's familiar when I read about it, though for such a disorder it seems like a paradox.

[Trialbyfire]

You probably saw the part about short periods of this being normal. We all disassociate when times are tough. Otherwise, we'd all be basket cases...oh...hang on, this is LS, we are.

 

Factors that tend to diminish symptoms are comforting interpersonal interactions, intense physical or emotional stimulation, and relaxation.

Does this sound familiar?

[whichwayisup]

Are you really happy at your job? It does seem you're missing that zing and passion for life. Mild depression, maybe? Depending on where you live, the upcoming winter months, the light changing, feeling more tired, irritated, bored COULD be a mild symptom of SAD.

 

Why not start a project that you will get alot of self satisfaction.

 

Life is full of up's and down's, sometimes you feel great, other times you feel crappy. You can't be happy, fufilled, stimulated and passionate ALL the time, so maybe right now you're having a low period in your life and nothing really seems too interesting.

 

I find journaling helps, write out all your thoughts, fears, the way you're feeling down on paper...

[marlena]

Monkey,

You seem to be in good company. Many of us feel a slight discontent now and again particularly as we move into the autumn and winter months. I myself am feeling the brunt of it. I know what you mean about going through the motions of, say, seeing friends, doing the shopping, trudging to work and not really beina "all there".

 

I think to understand we have to try to understand what triggered this off. I think it is a good beginning. Think hard and be honest with yourself. Ask yourself, "Why am I really feeling this way?' More often than not, if we delve hard into ourselves, we are like to get to the root of it. Once we have, we may stand a good chance of fixing it.

[Darkzen]

Sounds like me at times. I usually need to shake up things and start over or I find myself slipping into depression. Kind of like I feel "what's the point of it all?". I ache for stability, but at the same time I dread it. I'm constantly changing my mind when I pick projects and/or goals. I'm an idea person, but I don't have the ability to take an idea and make it into a reality. I have a few movie treatments, but no desire or skill to turn them into scripts. I have a few video game concepts, but once I start putting thoughts to paper, I seem to lose interest. I have concepts to start my own martial arts style, non-profit organization, religion, etc... I have no clue how to begin usually. I end up getting bored and frustrated when putting any of my ideas to action.

 

I could probably do many things in life, but nothing seems to bring passion to me. Probably the only thing that does is thinking up a new idea, once it's in my head, the passion fades quickly. I always attributed it to a feeling of loneliness. I feeling of not being understood. I feel Esoteric at times, just without the enlightened few around me. I'd probably love to be a scientist (F-ing with stuff and seeing what happens always interests me), but I don't have the patience to deal with Universities or Colleges. I end up losing interest extremely fast and with it goes my desire. Even now I'm in school for 3D animation and I'm always done well before everyone else in the class each day. Then I start to get bored while waiting for them to catch up. I don't feel challenged pretty much ever.

 

I also have the tendency to start discussions/debates on message boards, hoping to find someone that'll give me a run for my money, intellectually. Make me honestly question things, challenge my thinking and present points that make me see inconsistencies in my views. Most people aren't into debating for the sake of debating though. Hell, even on sites dedicated to intellectual pursuits usually bore me nowadays... everything comes back to perspective. Arguing it, is merely an exercise in futility, besides very rare circumstances. It's almost like I have to push the edge of madness to ever get people involved in the conversations. Basically all conversations/discussions/debates end in "let's agree to disagree".

 

Anyways, I rambled enough. I'd suggest finding something that challenges you on all three horizons... mentally, physically and spiritually. Although, they all don't have to be at the same time

[marlena]

Yes, I too have a number of aborted projects collecting dust in my drawers. An almost finished doctoral dissertation, a quite but not yet finished novel, a splatter of poems everywhere, a half-baked article and an array of unpaid bills just to mention a few,lol.

 

I too get bored easily. I get all enthused about starting something new and then midway I give up. This is one trait of mine I distinctly dislike and one that has caused me much mental anguish as well. It makes me feel like a failure which sets off a new bout of depression. I just can't focus long enough or I get sidetracked by something else.

 

 

A number of things can set off a bout of immobilizing depression. A lost lover, a deceased parent/s, loneliness, a child that has moved away from home, the hangings in Iran, the years gone by, the few left and on it goes and goes. At times it can be something as simple as a few added pounds!

 

And then, there are those stalemate periods of our lives where nothing seems to happen, nothing seems to CHANGE... there is no intensity, no passion and that can drag a person down too especially if he/she thrives on new stimuli to feel alive and kicking.

 

Deep down inside we all know what ails us.

 

Travelling is a good way to feel excitement again. This I plan to do more of.

[BeAlive]

There are times that I feel lost and also look out for a meaning in life. I used to worry about it more than anything else and get real stressed out.

 

While looking out in the internet for materials that might help me, I came across this book called The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles. But what was really interesting was that there was available an ecourse that helped to put to practice what is in the book. And it was not just about getting rich. It helped provide quite a mental clean-up.

 

Not sure whether you have ever seen this anywhere else, but the author of this course lets you set the price for this ecourse.

 

It helped me and I have a squidoo lens on this if you are interested in checking this out. Have indicated under my signature.

 

Regina

Be Alive With Self Help

http://www.squidoo.com/getthescienceofgettingrichforfree/

[monkey00]

Are you really happy at your job? It does seem you're missing that zing and passion for life. Mild depression, maybe? Depending on where you live, the upcoming winter months, the light changing, feeling more tired, irritated, bored COULD be a mild symptom of SAD.

 

Why not start a project that you will get alot of self satisfaction.

 

Life is full of up's and down's, sometimes you feel great, other times you feel crappy. You can't be happy, fufilled, stimulated and passionate ALL the time, so maybe right now you're having a low period in your life and nothing really seems too interesting.

 

I find journaling helps, write out all your thoughts, fears, the way you're feeling down on paper...

 

Although the winter is coming around the corner, where I am it's been sunny so far daily so it shouldnt be SAD. Though I think my job is a great contributing factor to this because figuratively speaking it pulls a shade or foggy curtains over my mind. I get off late from work so it's difficult to do much afterwards with or without friends. And when I do get off work, it's late, I'm tired so I just wind up going home.

 

You might be right though, I probably have hit a low period right now though I've never experienced anything like this until now because generally I'm an optimist - so I am facing some difficulty coping with this.

 

I think to understand we have to try to understand what triggered this off. I think it is a good beginning. Think hard and be honest with yourself. Ask yourself, "Why am I really feeling this way?' More often than not, if we delve hard into ourselves, we are like to get to the root of it. Once we have, we may stand a good chance of fixing it.

Over the weekend, I kind of looked at the things I did that felt good - such as being in the company of friends or people, and just laughing..releasing all those good endorphins really helped clear my mind. But that's only a temporary relief.

 

Anyways, I rambled enough. I'd suggest finding something that challenges you on all three horizons... mentally, physically and spiritually. Although, they all don't have to be at the same time

I think that martial arts class could help a lot in those 3 aspects. I've always wanted to take it when I was in college, but couldn't because I was a night student. I figured I'd do it after college was over, but now I also can't because I work late:mad: But aside from that, I'm sure there are other ways to compensate.

 

As for projects of my own, I do have a few that are constantly ongoing. But like others here, I get sidetracked at times. But one thing I reflected on is that probably having a girl in my life would make me happier, she would make my achievements appear more promising, and I might even have something to look forward to after work even. I've been out of the field for awhile, I think it's about damn time I got back into the world of dating again....!!

 

Much thanks to everyone that replied!

[marlena]

But one thing I reflected on is that probably having a girl in my life would make me happier, she would make my achievements appear more promising, and I might even have something to look forward to after work even. I've been out of the field for awhile, I think it's about damn time I got back into the world of dating again....!!

 

 

 

Ah, see? We all know deep down inside what is lacking in our lives...Having a partner to come home to is ...or differently put ...finding that companionship that will fulfill us is vital to our well - being if we are to have an optimistic attitude towards life.

 

I do not have a SO in my life right now and like you it is causing me a lot of depression. That and the fact that my daughter moved to another country and so now it is me, myself and I that I am coming home are both contributing factors to the way I am feeling. Plus a few other things as well.

 

They say that happiness will find you when you are most happy with yourself. Perhaps if we smiled more often then maybe it will.

 

How long has it been since you've been in a relationship? Are you ready for a new one, do you think? For it will happen..surely you must know that. I assume that you are quite young and that many opportunities to meet someone will come your way.

 

Create an image of that girl in your head and she will come to find you. Til then do some of the things you have been thinking about.

 

Try to be with friends however hard it is when you are feeling so low that all you want to do is hide beneath your sheets. Force yourself if need be. Even that temporary release is a first step in the right direction.

[BeAlive]

I can relate to those who get ideas and excited about the possibilities but just do not seem to get things going to achieve results. There is the initial quick enthusiasm and then seems to fizzle off.

 

The good news though is I have noticed that writing down things seem to have a very good effect on me. This seems to clear my brains so that things can get organized and structured in there. Action plans are part of this.

 

When I write down my actions, then I am able to get through them and then results come in. Most times results are not immediate. I just got to keep doing enough actions until it happens.

 

What really has been a great help all my life have been books that I have read that give me the momentary boost to restart again. I keep getting into the "lazy and lost" stages but get myself out through reading books and getting into seminars, ecourses that are helpful...and forums are a great help.

 

Regina

Be Alive With Self Help

http://www.squidoo.com/getthescienceofgettingrichforfree/