Last Gasp

[trent]

I am so confused. I have been seeing the most wonderful woman for the past 2 1/2 years and we are now officially "broken up". We have lived together for about one year until she recently moved out. From the beginning our relationship was very special yet very difficult. We have been talking about marriage and children until it seemed like it was a "given".

 

She came to me recently and said that she was not happy and wanted a breakup. This has been very difficult and hard to deal with lately. But we still talk nearly every day and still go out. But she says that she can't open up to me right now, which I miss very much. I love to hear her say "I Love You", but I haven't since the breakup.

 

I am giving her space and time, but I guess I am afraid to let go completely. I am the one that continues to persue her and ask her out. She never asks me out or shows me affection. It is becoming more and more difficult to be patient and sometimes I think that it may be better not to talk to her and be dissappointed by her lack of caring. But I don't want to give up.

 

I know she loves me and I have always been her greatest love which makes this so confusing. I don't spend nearly as much time with her as I did when we were together. It is hard to picture her with someone else, but she seems to be going out with friends all the time.

 

I don't know where to go from here. Should I continue to put my heart on the line and be dissapointed. Or should I gather the strength to sever all of the ties between us. Time seems to be going by very slowly when I can't spend it with the love of my life. Any advice or perspective would be helpful.

[Joe]

If you've been seeing her for 2 1/2 years, that adds up to 30 months. What I would do is invest another 10% or 3 months into the relationship. If after 3 months after your breakup, she still is cool to you, then I would cut the ties and look elsewhere.

I am so confused. I have been seeing the most wonderful woman for the past 2 1/2 years and we are now officially "broken up". We have lived together for about one year until she recently moved out. From the beginning our relationship was very special yet very difficult. We have been talking about marriage and children until it seemed like it was a "given".

 

She came to me recently and said that she was not happy and wanted a breakup. This has been very difficult and hard to deal with lately. But we still talk nearly every day and still go out. But she says that she can't open up to me right now, which I miss very much. I love to hear her say "I Love You", but I haven't since the breakup. I am giving her space and time, but I guess I am afraid to let go completely. I am the one that continues to persue her and ask her out. She never asks me out or shows me affection. It is becoming more and more difficult to be patient and sometimes I think that it may be better not to talk to her and be dissappointed by her lack of caring. But I don't want to give up. I know she loves me and I have always been her greatest love which makes this so confusing. I don't spend nearly as much time with her as I did when we were together. It is hard to picture her with someone else, but she seems to be going out with friends all the time. I don't know where to go from here. Should I continue to put my heart on the line and be dissapointed. Or should I gather the strength to sever all of the ties between us. Time seems to be going by very slowly when I can't spend it with the love of my life. Any advice or perspective would be helpful.