confusedinVA Posted April 19, 2003 Share Posted April 19, 2003 [font=courier new][/font][color=darkblue][/color] hi there. i have a big problem. i live in an apartment complex, and i started hanging out with my neighbor across the way. i soon found out that she is really special. we hung out all the time. things started to get sorta serious - i let her know how i felt, she let me know how she felt. we both admitted that we liked each other A LOT. we had so many interesting discussions, and did things like slow dance to frank sinatra at like 3am. ok well about a week ago she came over to my place. we had a few drinks, and ended up in my bedroom... ...ok i paused the story to fill you in on the problem. things seem to be going well right? i mean, we had a really deep connection - even deeper than with my last girlfriend that i was with for almost two years. ok well here's the rub - she has a fiance. he works nights, so he doesnt get home until like 5am. now, she was all the time telling me about how shes too young too be married, hes a dirtbag, she never sees him (hes only ever really home on the weekends) and stuff like that. so the only reason that i kept on pursuing her was because i figured there was a really good chance. ok - so continuing... ...she asked me to kiss her, and i did. it was so excellent - it made me feel SO good. i asked to kiss her again, and we did. then we ended up rolling around on my bed. she told me i was lovely and beautiful, she apologized for making my life complicated; i told her exactly the same. well it got really late and she ended up going home after a good night kiss. a couple of days later i went over to her place and we ended up naked on her floor because she wanted to see my body. we did not have sex...being with her does not require having sex to feel wonderful. well it got really late and i had to leave cause the fiance was about to come home. fast forward to now...she got a job working nights, and now i never see her. the only day she has off is mondays, and who am i to think that on her one off day i am going to come first before family, friends, etc. you know? i have been heartsick for the better part of a week. she called me the other day and asked me how i was doing and i told her that i was going crazy cause i could not see her and we could not be together. she said "youre just gonna have to give it some time." what do i do? do i wait? theres something so powerful there that i cant just walk away...but i dont want to screw up her life. im so confused. please give me some advice!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted April 19, 2003 Share Posted April 19, 2003 Hate to break it to you, but she's someone to stay away from. So did you she tell you right from the START that she was engaged to someone? She surely should have. So her and her fiance live together? So basically, she has her fun with you, while he's away at work, then you have to leave because he's coming home? Sorry friend, she's a ho. A good person wouldn't be screwing around (sex or not) with someone else, while they're engaged. And if her fiance is such a jerk and she's not happy or ready to be married, then she should be enough of a decent human being to just break if off with him so that he can move on with his life and find someone who's honest, decent, loyal. I would venture to guess that she got this new job (or new schedule) working night shifts so that her and her fiance are now on the same schedule..........I mean, if she really wasn't happy with him, why would she want to work the same shift as him? I think you need to try and forget all about her....before her fiance catches onto all this and comes over and cleans your clock. Why would you want to be with someone who is sneaking around behind their fiance's back? If she's done it to him, she'll do it to you. Sounds to me, too, that she's perhaps been using you for fun/companionship/affection, while he's not been around. I say forget her, break off all contact, and invest your time in someone who's truly available and able to be in a real relationship..not some skank who's slinking around while her man is at work. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 19, 2003 Share Posted April 19, 2003 So you honestly want to have a girl who screws around with her nextdoor neighbor while her fiance is hard at work? DUH??? I don't care how nice it was, she was betraying the trust of her fiance. If she said bad things about him, she was being two-faced and insincere. This girl does whatever she wants to make herself feel good for whatever time she wants. She's certainly not someone I would want for a casual friend. You been had, my friend. But it's your fault. When you violate the basic morals and ethics of man, you get it straight up the butt every time. Go buy some Vaseline or KY Jelly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author confusedinVA Posted April 20, 2003 Author Share Posted April 20, 2003 thanks so much for the advice...since i read the replies i felt so relieved. you guys put into words the random thoughts and feelings that have been rolling around in my head. now that i read them, i realize i was such an idiot. what was i thinking? i dont know...anyway, thanks for the prompt advice and for making me feel so much better. til the next post... Link to post Share on other sites
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